Episode 106: Modi and Periel are joined by Arthur Luxenberg and Uri Schneider for a special episode about stuttering.
Modi's special "Know Your Audience" is available now.
For all upcoming shows visit www.modilive.com.
Follow Modi on Instagram at @modi_live.
Episode 106: Modi and Periel are joined by Arthur Luxenberg and Uri Schneider for a special episode about stuttering.
Modi's special "Know Your Audience" is available now.
For all upcoming shows visit www.modilive.com.
Follow Modi on Instagram at @modi_live.
Welcome to and here's Modi. Hello everybody back to and here's Modi. We have a house full of guests. We have we have Arthur Luxemburg back, we have Ori Schneider. Am I saying it right?
Speaker 2:I accept all variations, is it?
Speaker 1:Schneider. We have Perrielle and me. We are on a high from. We just finished the two shows in Paramount. Perrielle did a hot five upfront and slayed the house down boots. It was so good she wore her first outfit was rag and bone and was gorgeous no-transcript the shoot. Super beautiful. I'm happy to be a point. Uh, you know, we went to get our AM ihr Nik and it knocked over all the masses out here to see two full pool or two.
Speaker 3:He's a Lafayette 148.
Speaker 1:The makeup was amazing and you looked great, and your husband's in the audience and Shkoyek.
Speaker 3:You can't tell me not to dress like a cleaning lady.
Speaker 1:I said you can't come out with your Schmatta. I didn't say cleaningly, I just say that some of the shirts you wear looks like what we give the housekeeper to use with the Glass Plus, even though they're $500, but the Schmatta it's Schmatta's we used to go. Don't throw it away, give it to the housekeeper, she'll show Glass Plus with it. Anyway, we are back in the studio. We of course want to thank up front our collaborators, friends, sponsors, whites and Luxembourg, the law firm that not only does well, they do good, they're very philanthropic and they're close friends. They help us. They know that people enjoy this and this brings machine energy and they want to be a part of it. And authors in the house Also. A&h provisions best Glockocher meets best hot dogs. Even the Goehm realizes this and that's where they get their hot dogs from and their website is kosherdogsnet and WhitesLuxcom, or also WhitesAnluxcom, because I was saying it wrong.
Speaker 3:So they added a website. Yes, look at him.
Speaker 1:He's an author in shock Author, just so you know. Never listens to this His wife. He gives him the updates and the reviews.
Speaker 3:You have two websites.
Speaker 1:Okay, so we on the podcast here, when we had author last time, we spoke about stuttering and we had never received so many DMs and emails about this, most of them from parents of children that stutter and Uri from what's the name of the organization Schneider Speech. Schneider Speech not an easy thing to say.
Speaker 2:We had well stuttering also, like it's a funny word for people who have trouble getting words out. S is a hard yeah, it's like, and it has the double sound. Did you do that on purpose? We didn't do it. Also it's interesting, in Hebrew also gim gum it always. In every language the word for stuttering has a repetition and Really Stutter.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, I didn't realize that gim gum.
Speaker 2:And in Yiddish it's keketsin, keketsin. Is it Keketsin In every?
Speaker 1:language it has this Keketsin good word. So listen, you are the. I mean, I've seen the videos from your about your work and we are here and the number one thing I was calling it tricks to avoid stuttering. You said it's better to use techniques, or what were the?
Speaker 2:other words you used, you can call it anything. I think the important thing is that it shouldn't have like a negative connotation, like if you're trying to like slip something by a trick If you like trick, that's fine. Tools, strategies, techniques and I think different words work for different people. You know, when you make jokes about the Holocaust you talked about the importance of picking the right words you don't want to trigger the wrong thing. So if you walk into a room and you say listen, I have a few speech tricks, that doesn't really. People could think all kinds of tricks.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, so you want to think of things that work for the person. But the most important thing is it's funny. You do an episode on stuttering and people start talking.
Speaker 1:That's right, it's pretty ironic. One of the stickers you gave me. He was very sweet, he. One of the things I love most is backstage when people send gifts and people. People send you like homemade cookies, brownies, a toy or whatever something from their company and he sent stickers and one of the stickers you had was Speak, Talk, more, talk, more, fear, less, fear, less, very, very nice.
Speaker 4:Yeah, that would be amazing Take the badge.
Speaker 1:There's a whole set yeah. Oh, they're all different yeah.
Speaker 4:They're all different.
Speaker 1:So that's it's true, and I was watching the videos you had of people who, like the one guy that said he had to speak in class and instead of speaking he jammed a pencil into his hand.
Speaker 2:There's a crazy thing about that. That's a documentary. It was on PBS, yeah, and my dad filmed his work. My dad is Dr Phil Schneider. He's in Riverdale. He continues to do his work. He's amazing and should be well 120. He taught at Queens College. She had an office in Great Neck. We drove past her on the way to the show in Huntington. I took him to the show on Sunday night, yeah, and it's unbelievable, because what he did is he realized?
Speaker 2:Stop focusing on the stuttering. It's not about treating stuttering. It's about treating people and helping people talk more. People who stutter want to talk. It's not that they want to stop stuttering. They think they want to stop stuttering. What they really want to do is, if they want to stop stuttering, go quiet. But silence is the most dangerous thing. Nobody wants their kid to go dark, nobody wants their kid to be quiet. And so many people who stutter. You don't hear them stutter and it's interesting when you were having the conversation. Some of the ways people cope is just by ducking and dodging and staying safe, staying away from a certain word lest I be heard or exposed, and so the danger of stuttering is less about the words and sounds getting stuck. It's more about not saying what you really want to say.
Speaker 4:So it's really great to be here again first of all, and thank you for joining me.
Speaker 1:You're welcome whenever you want. And thank you for including me in this group, and thank you for wearing what you're wearing. Those of you who are only listening to this, you have to just go to YouTube just to see the outfit Arthur hit us with today.
Speaker 4:So I also spent a little bit of time watching some of the documentaries you and your dad did and they were very meaningful to me because it opened my eyes to certain things that I was not even aware of. And, the biggest thing, because I had formalized training, I didn't overcome and I don't think you never formally overcome stuttering You're always on edge about it. But unlike you, I went to Long Island Jewish speech and hearing for many, many years just mentioning his name I don't know if he'll ever hear this Gabbard name of Arthur Jacobs, doctor Arthur Jacobs and I actually spoke to him about a year or two ago. We worked extensively on techniques and if we have a chance to talk about that today, we should, because it's a lot different from the takeaway that I got from you and your dad and you and your dad's techniques and the way you approach this was very, very interesting in giving the stutterers, giving the community and people that are I don't want to even call it afflicted, because it's just a-.
Speaker 4:Facing this adversity challenging, with this peckle Facing this adversity a way to get comfortable with it without necessarily overcoming it. Learning how to be comfortable with your stutter and not necessarily finding a trick. Sure, there are ways and techniques and there are things that children and adults who are overcome with this can learn, but the biggest thing would be that teaching people to live with this effectively, which I just want to again go on record as saying that I'm a much greater advocate for speech therapy because I think that, in a lot of situations, children, of course, if they're living in a community where they feel safe, finally, amongst people that are similar to them, and they're never going out and challenging themselves and going to high schools and colleges and starting to work the worst thing and I watched the documentaries I did, periel, and I formally apologized to you for jumping down your throat in the middle of the night, for sending me the Schneider homework in the middle of the night- we were talking about videos that you're my father and I produced two documentaries, one is called.
Speaker 3:Transcending Stuttering and one's called the Guide Going With the Flow, the Guide to Transcending.
Speaker 4:And it's real people.
Speaker 2:It's the story of real people growing up and what they went through.
Speaker 4:They weren't. I thought I was gonna hear about techniques, and not at all. It was all about the psychological impact of these children and learning how to overcome that and get through it. And look at you and I, modi, and I don't know who in your family was the starter, or or maybe your father was just a renowned speech therapist and realized this. But I'm telling you, modi and Uri, we need to light this up and I think, modi, that you are the perfect touchstone for this, and I think I am as well For sure, because I'll support it. I'll support it financially. I wanna blow this up.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 4:I wanna blow it up. I think that we have to give back. Besides all the incredible Jewish, jewish charities that we're involved in, this is something that's near and dear to our hearts and we have thrived in life because of it and despite it, and I think that we owe a great deal to our afflictions that we've managed to not overcome but live with and become the top of our professions, and I think that we need to do something.
Speaker 1:That's Mashiach energy. The Rebbe said, when Jews meet, the first thing they should do is discuss how to help somebody else. We gotta come back to my dad Mashiach energy.
Speaker 2:When the Rebbe had a second stroke, they needed a speech therapist.
Speaker 4:No, yeah, I mean, I saw that in.
Speaker 2:My father was not a religious man.
Speaker 4:I read that he was a prophet.
Speaker 2:He didn't know who this Rebbe Schneerson was, the Lubavitcher Rebbe which we've heard so much from you on the podcast and everywhere. Rebbe Menachem Mendelsch, Niersen Habad. So this person had a command of what more than 15 languages.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:He had a stroke and suddenly he couldn't communicate. Not only was he a leader in this sect, he was running a global enterprise and all kinds of decisions financial decisions, interpersonal. So the two people that were helping the Rebbe they care the Rebbe. They called my father and they said Dr Schneider, you can do a much better. Brooklyn, lubavitch phone call. Hi, this is Goldberg. This is Goldberg, we need you to. You're gonna come treat this rabbi. My dad says I don't do house calls. I don't know who this is and I'm also not the person that is the best person to help someone after a stroke. I'm happy to help connect you and they wouldn't take no for an answer. There's no, we'll send you a car. He says no, no, no, you don't understand. I'm not that guy. Wow.
Speaker 3:So what are the stories?
Speaker 2:So that night he goes to sleep. And he turned, he rebuffed them. He said no, he speaks it over with my mother.
Speaker 1:He speaks it over with my mother that was Yiddish. Your head that was basically Yiddish with English words.
Speaker 2:It was yeah. So he has a discussion with my mom. He doesn't make the final decision. He knows to run it by the boss and my mother. My mother says I think you should help this man, I think you should help him. Wow. Now, what my father does next is what really blew me away. You got to go all in. And this comes to stuttering too, like if you're hedging what you want to say, you're going to stumble and stutter, whether you stutter or not. And if you stutter even more. So my father didn't hedge and say well, what time can you meet my schedule, can you do? My father said when is he most alert? Anyone knows the Lubavitch Revvy was always most alert at four in the morning. So my father said send the car at three AM.
Speaker 3:Oh, my God.
Speaker 2:So I was 12 and a half and my father was treating the Revvy. I didn't get to see the Revvy, but my dad had private time with the Lubavitch Revvy. Wow, he wasn't speaking and I learned how to put on to fill in downstairs in 770 with Rabbi Groner and by Krenski.
Speaker 1:Wow, no, that you didn't tell me until now. Wanted to leave something good.
Speaker 2:We got lots more.
Speaker 1:I did not see that happening Did you call my father.
Speaker 2:My father has incredible stories.
Speaker 1:First of all, everybody, every rabbi that the Revvy, every rabbi, that the Revvy, every rabbi that ever helped the Revvy, has such insane stories. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So my father and it also ties into everything his ethos and his way and with stuttering he came in and he said that the two rabbis were holding him, like locking his arms, because they saw he didn't know exactly how to interact. What was the conduct, what was the culture, what were the codes? So they walked, my father and holding him tight, and he sees a person who, on the one hand, should be in a hospital maybe, but they've set up this room so beautifully, with such respect and such dignity and instead of having like a robe with the backside open, satin robe with like buttons so they could access, get a line in, get a line out, but everything very dignified. So that was the first lesson my father takes, like how we should treat people who are older and people who might be not well, and the way people are treated in hospitals. They like strips, people of all their dignity Comes in and the Rev is not speaking and they said do you think he'll be able to give a frebrengan?
Speaker 2:Do you think he'll be able to? My father said, well, what's a frebrengan? So he says, well, it's kind of like where there's thousands of these chassidim hanging on every word and without any notes, he's pulling up sources seamlessly for hours on end, speaking malefluously, and my father's looking at a man who just had his second stroke and he's not speaking and he's being brought in to ask can he also make decisions? So my father says I don't know, but let's try. I don't know, but let's try. It's also a big lesson. I don't know, but if you don't ask, the answer's always no. So you gotta try.
Speaker 2:So my father? Basically, the first question was there were letters being sent to the Lvovich Rebbe to ask him to make big decisions. They wanted to know could he understand, did he have the ability to understand and could he give answers that were reliable and what would be the code? So my father said we're gonna take three people One is a Yiddish speaker, one is an English speaker, one is a Hebrew speaker. My father took the English. They presented the question in both ways a yes or no and they asked him a question about a financial decision that came in from somewhere in Australia. And my father said just look at the Rebbe and then we'll come together and compare our notes what the answer is. And so they asked him six ways. They compared their notes. They all got the exact same answer just by looking at his eyes.
Speaker 2:The second question was a young woman who was set up in an arranged marriage to marry a divorcee, and he was older and she wasn't in for this and she wanted to know if she could cancel this arranged marriage. And they all agreed that the Rebbe's answer was yes, it was full agreement. And the point was that, beyond words, you look at the face, you look into the eyes, you look into the soul and you see what's there. And so my father was able, thank God, to help Chabad Lvovich see. The Rebbe knew what was happening. He was able to be dependable in his decisions. My father wasn't able to help him get to the point where he could give a frebrengan again, but he had many sacred encounters. That was his first encounter with a person of the magnitude of the Rebbe. Sacred encounters, that's what my dad's called.
Speaker 1:There's your title of the podcast.
Speaker 2:My dad says every phone call that we get and every meeting that we have should be a sacred encounter, wow.
Speaker 1:Amazing, amazing.
Speaker 2:So that's the prelude.
Speaker 1:They asked when the Rebbe had a stroke, they changed 770, they put him in the back, but everything was always dignity and beautiful and you felt his energy still.
Speaker 2:The other thing that he did, the Rebbe. They built as you said. They turned it around. They built a balcony. They broke a wall from his study which was the room they were taking care of him into the study hall so that he could not have to go downstairs and around there was no tunnel then, but just go out the balcony and see the chassidim. And they brought him out and no one knew if he'd be able to speak. He's standing there and nothing's coming out For the community. It was very painful because I hadn't seen him. So much wanted to see him, to hear. It's a painful, traumatic experience for the community. But my father takes away is that you see his attendance, trying to pull him back, but you see his determination and he stood there for a very long time. My father feels that in standing there he was also transmitting a message.
Speaker 1:Yeah beyond words.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Wow, wow, wow. I didn't see that coming through.
Speaker 2:There you go, thank you, wow. But what Arthur said I think is really important, which is it shouldn't be misunderstood that the work with people who stutter should be just psychological and emotional. We need to integrate the two sides. So we created a framework called transcending stuttering framework. There's four parts. One is self-knowledge to know what is stuttering. Who are you, what are your strengths, what are your weaknesses, what are your interests, what are your talents.
Speaker 2:Understanding that so many people that stutter don't know what makes me stutter more, what makes me stutter less. I'm so busy shadow boxing with this thing, but I don't know what it's all about. And I don't know what I'm all about. What do I really want?
Speaker 2:The second thing is self-adjustment, which is the techniques, the training, just like you would train for golfer, for tennis. There are things you can learn. It's like shifting gears when you shift gears, the engine performs differently, so there are things you can learn mechanically and drill. The third thing is that self-acceptance Looking in the mirror and seeing you're worth it. You're perfectly imperfect, just like every other human being. That's the way we're made. And love yourself. Love yourself up, because if you love yourself, other people will come to love you too. And then the fourth is self-advocacy, which is what we're doing here and what you talked about, arthur and Modi, for having this conversation, talking about it, putting it out there, whether you're a young person or a parent, telling the teacher what's up, telling people in your family, in your circle, how you want them to respond when it comes up, so they'll be more comfortable, you'll be more comfortable and you can have real connections. So those are the four pieces.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and that's an interesting thing. Breaking it down that way is very, very helpful in the community, which I never did, and I mentioned off camera maybe we were on camera before that I watched one of the podcasts or one of the documentaries the Uniadad did. You know, it was very emotional to me because I haven't studied this in a very long time. I had extensive therapy and when I saw how painful it was for some of these younger children that you highlighted in the documentaries and I watched all of them and I appreciate the diversity of children and young adults that you presented you presented them from, you know, from the look like observant to inner city youth, and it was good to see that because I have my own views on that and people that can get help and people that aren't getting help, but I really. But what I'm saying to you is that I never remember having one single example of being ridiculed or criticized never, won and I was a profound stutterer, so it was very odd to me.
Speaker 4:Did I block it out? Did I not remember this? And I could not?
Speaker 1:care, Maybe I don't know, maybe there was, you don't remember it?
Speaker 4:Yeah, but I'm a very, like, sensitive person. Okay, oh, I don't know if I was sensitive as a kid, so I call my mother right. And one thing about my mother and my family we were, like, very supportive of each other. You know, might was my grandmother and I think I might have said this before was my grandmother that took me for speech therapy three times a week and it wasn't like going across the street or next door. It was going from Queens, going from Queens, going to Long Island to pick me up from school, taking me to Long Island Jewish Hospital, waiting for me there and driving me back to Woodmere. So it was a very special time that we spent together and she built me up by making me feel like I'm special. I could do anything along the lines of what you and your dad did.
Speaker 2:And any anecdotes remember with your grandmother.
Speaker 4:There were endless anecdotes. I mean, I would say to her and I was almost, I was in college at this point, at the end of high school, going into college, and I would say to my grandmother I'm not afraid to admit, you know, that I felt I was ordinary. I felt that way, I didn't feel I was extraordinary, I felt like I was a regular kid or, you know, ordinary kid. And she's telling me how extraordinary I am and how I could do anything and I'm going to be something great. And I would say to her you know, grandma, that's so great, but I don't get it. You know, I'm just very ordinary and I have a speech, a speech impediment. You know, how do I get there? She says, you'll see.
Speaker 4:And I don't know if she ever saw, you know, my successes, whatever those are, but you know she gets the credit. So when I called my mother, I said to her I said, mom, you know what's the story? Do you have any stories of me coming home, you know, talking about being shattered? And she said, no, you know. You, I guess, lived in a great environment at a time when, you know, you had teachers that also supported this and you never let it happen to you that you know and I, because I've listened to old recordings of myself, you know, and I said to myself it's not like I'm speaking normally. I'm clearly have a real problem, which is why I went for therapy for many years and I needed to get the help.
Speaker 3:But I never I never felt that.
Speaker 4:So it was very emotional that children were feeling that way and I said to myself I got to do something about this. It's not just getting them the physical help and treatment. And because I guess sometimes and some of the comments that we got was, luxembourg is wrong, you know, you can't be in a room alone and not stutter, I said, yeah, people that people jumped on me, jumped on you for that. Yeah, I'm not saying I'm a doctor.
Speaker 2:I'm saying stutterers are like Jews, you know they don't have one opinion. You state opinion, you're gonna have somebody, that's gonna do a different stuttering thing, and that's fine, but I said for me, I said for me.
Speaker 4:you know, I'm in a room alone.
Speaker 2:I'll tell you what my father said. Well, you.
Speaker 1:I can never. When you and I first began hanging out, I never would have thought you were a stutterer. Well, he doesn't stutter like stuttering John. He doesn't start out, he doesn't stutter at all. We've had dinners together, I think. Maybe months later he tells me he's a stutterer because he saw me stuttering.
Speaker 4:And then I never saw you that way either, because I just saw you as the funniest guy.
Speaker 1:No, but you, I get caught at a dinner. I'll get caught. I just want to get something out.
Speaker 4:Just thought that was one of your affectations. I never viewed that. That's good to know. I've ever viewed that as and when you're on stage, unless you're really blocking, and I know that's a stutterer. I know that's a stutterer. Yeah, I never thought we were together at Dean's house and other places A lot. Yeah, on stage a lot.
Speaker 3:You don't stutter on stage.
Speaker 1:It's so. It's very funny. You say that I stutter on stage when it's new material and I'm not sure what words to use. At the show in, at the show in Huntington, long Island, the Paramount, I was about to do a new bit and I was exhausted and I said this is not going to come out cute. It was a bit about because we're in Long Island and it's all of the, the community's roslin and great neck and this point and that point. Yeah, you know all the rich neighborhoods and and what's funny now, and we also had the guy from the diner right with the posters all over the the hostage.
Speaker 1:posters all over the diner Gold and gold and gold diner and I wanted to say something along the lines like I love how all the Jews are on missions now. They all go on missions to Israel, they go on these programs to Israel and they're all trying to up out through each other. My mission staying at, I was staying at the King David. I'm at this Amethyst Citadel. We're going to get t shirts and the dog tag, but ours is in gold. We're going to barbecue with the soldiers right on the border. We're going to barbecue in the tunnel. I'm actually going to make my daughter's butt mitts, but in the tunnel with glott kosher tunnels. It's, it's, it's the.
Speaker 1:The end of your body and I was going to do this bit on stage. I said I am too tired to get all of these words out In my mind. I had it. I knew where the tag lines were it's the it, the barbecue in the tunnel, the gold instead of the silver dog tag and which hotel they're staying in. And then you can throw in like lamb chops and you know things that the Jews know. But I was like wow, because I was on, I was, I was fifth gear.
Speaker 1:You were a beast, so I said oh, you are way too tired to start doing a new bit now and the words are going to come out. I remember one time when I did this the bit on those stupid presidents of the schools and I and I was just. It was that day and I sent it and I started through the entire bit. Tell me to watch it. I sent it to author right away and, just in case you think I don't stutter here, I couldn't get one word out, but it was funny. I stayed with it. But I couldn't get the word genocide out, the killing. It was a mess, but it was a funny bit and got a lot of hits, but okay, so so talkless. But what's interesting is this is talkless.
Speaker 2:And then when he was Arthur and you had the same conversation in the other interview, where Arthur is saying to you I didn't know you stuttered and you're saying no, I'm telling you, I was stuttering and so you had this narrative of yourself stuttering and a lot of it was probably not even visible on the outside. It was how you were maneuvering on the inside and I think that we need to acknowledge that that is a big schvitz. That's a lot of energy that people consume. I mean what both of you do is hard enough to be a class act in your craft, but then to have to say, okay, it's like a taboo game. We got like many words we're going to not say we have many potholes we have to navigate. It's exhausting and the experience in here doesn't match without here.
Speaker 2:So parents sometimes don't recognize what the kids going through. Oh, no, you're fine, because they don't stutter, like stuttering John or someone else they saw on a movie that's stuttering and blinking and moving and getting and wrestling with every word. People say, oh, that's stuttering, you don't stutter. And then people say no, no, like I need to prove to you, I'm telling you, I know, like you said, the words are lined up, the bits lined up, it's all. It's actually awesome.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't trust it's going to come. Nix it.
Speaker 4:But what we could never allow, guys and lady, or you could never allow, is a situation where one of the people you had on a very meaningful man watched him get older in life and he seemed to be a lot more fluent than he ever was, and he said it was a scene in like a supermarket, yeah, where he actually had to pretend to be retarded In order to I don't know. I was hysterical.
Speaker 4:I can't even talk about it now because it was so emotional that it was. So he was in such a bad shape and how to get out of that situation that it was better for him to be retarded than for him to go through whatever he was going through at that moment. We can never allow for there not to be a better heightened awareness. We need to take billboards out to address this Okay, to address this in a meaningful way, using some of the things that you're using, working with you and your dad working with you, Modi. We can never allow people to think that a person that's presented as a stutterer is retarded or has Tourette's not that these are not diseases that also need to be highlighted and need to be overcome and need to be worked on. But what we're working on now is stuttering, and we need to make sure that people don't confuse a stutterer with other diseases that just don't correlate to stuttering.
Speaker 3:I think it's also giving people the power of their voice, like imagine what the world would miss if stutterers don't speak.
Speaker 4:I mean, what a great. By the way, Whoa, Whoa Right yes like you don't even have to close the show right now.
Speaker 3:No, I have one more thing.
Speaker 4:No, but I'm saying, perry, just imagine what the world would miss if stutterers didn't speak, and there were some very famous stutterers. You'd be missing a sponsor for the podcast. Yeah, lawyers, marilyn Monroe was a stutterer. There was a whole Jack Welch Jack.
Speaker 2:Welch, I mean, and he didn't have time for speech therapy. That was his attitude. He said I just don't give a and he just went forward. John Stossel.
Speaker 3:John Stossel, I've had him Hello.
Speaker 4:Yeah, john Stossel, was he ever on the podcast? No, we've had.
Speaker 3:We've had him on the seller podcast but we should have him on this Absolutely.
Speaker 4:That's awesome. I mean, we could stutterers are everywhere.
Speaker 2:You do the podcast and they all come out of the water. But how do we help the stutterers?
Speaker 3:We.
Speaker 1:I just want to say.
Speaker 3:I just want to say one thing quickly after the show in Huntington I don't know. Somebody came and said this guy's in the back and maybe Leo texted me and he spoke to Leo and this and that, and so I was in while I was talking to Uli and Dr Schneider and I started.
Speaker 2:Phil, he's the original doctor.
Speaker 3:Phil the, the goat of speech therapy apparently. And I said, you know, this is really interesting for me because my oldest and best friend from growing up is a stutterer and so she was always like my little sister and she had a very bad stutter. Very good stutter very strong stutter or a very good stutter.
Speaker 2:That's where the language matters there you go, the specificity of language, the talk, exactly the specificity, the precision because of appearances to the kid oh, did you have a, did you have a good talking day? Is that kid going to want to take a risk tomorrow? Wow, so messaging to kids good, bad, the sooner we can get to descriptive language. You could say one to ten. Ten is really fluid. Oh, those are the stutterers Wow, winston.
Speaker 3:Samuel.
Speaker 1:Robert's Ed Sheeran.
Speaker 3:Samuel L Jackson.
Speaker 1:Biden, who we spoke about.
Speaker 2:Samuel L Jackson is very interesting.
Speaker 1:Moses, Moses should have been.
Speaker 2:There you go, ed.
Speaker 3:Sheeran, ed Sheeran, yes.
Speaker 2:Yes, wow, but, but I'm not sure about it, Moses.
Speaker 3:how do they know Moses?
Speaker 2:I thought you were making that up.
Speaker 1:I thought you were being funny, I could hold a whole bit on that.
Speaker 4:What do you mean, moses, when? When he was, you know, going to the Coles right Instead of they directed him and he his first thing, when God said to him you're going to be the leader, you got to go, you know, lead the Jewish people and take them out of Egypt. And he said me, I tell me, I can't. I have a hard of speech.
Speaker 3:Are you serious?
Speaker 4:Yes, you know directly right there in Exodus directly in the book.
Speaker 3:I have to.
Speaker 4:Oh. Perry that you've never read the Torah, but you have to admit never read, but I actually our own and that's why our own his brother, you know became so important to him because he was sort of his spokesperson.
Speaker 3:Wow, so welcome to being Jewish.
Speaker 1:Yes, there's a story, Harry. Feel free to feel free to read. The Torah is really interesting.
Speaker 3:I read the Torah right now, because I'm reading the five people you meet in heaven. But wait, let me.
Speaker 4:OK, it's 100.
Speaker 2:My dad talked about so.
Speaker 3:I meet Dr Phil yeah.
Speaker 1:And OG Philly.
Speaker 3:OG and I'm telling him, my best friend growing up had a very strong stutter. So I really grew up and she used to go to camp for this and Dr Phil says to me what's her name. You know, I'm like you know it's so crazy after the show and everybody's talking and I'm like you know I didn't really have like a clear sense of like who you guys were.
Speaker 2:You were busy talking to Peter. It was like unclear. That's right, we just come from the hostage diner.
Speaker 3:It was like a whole thing and but your dad's so intense and like we were like it was like a very like focused conversation, Like I was almost getting like Almost like a sacred encounter.
Speaker 2:Almost like a sacred kind of good callback good callback Callback.
Speaker 3:And he said what was her name? And I said I told him her name and he said she was my student.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it's great. And then he said and volunteered on the video?
Speaker 2:Oh, which one, which one? Would she help catalog some of the clips to make those documentary films Erica did? Yeah, that's what my father remembers, wow. You said yeah my dad said can I send you a video message?
Speaker 3:So, and so I sent it to her from the show and she was over the moon, she was in California and she loves you, and so she. I mean, that was just so amazing. Wait, can we can?
Speaker 1:we, so I don't want to lose track here. How are we helping people? How we're not going? To figure it out right this time. But we have to start somewhere where someone can go get help. So we're going to just for us. When the DMs start coming in from this, where can my kid get help? Where can? What can I do with my child so we can set?
Speaker 2:up. We can set up a page that you can send people. That will have some very practical do's and don'ts, practical things to do. It doesn't help anybody to tell them don't do this, don't do this, don't do this, don't do this. It's so individualized, the stuttering, but there are certain definite no-nos. So telling a kid, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up, take a deep breath, relax, think about what you want to say. Those are all messages that are going to hold a kid back. Ok, let me start off your technique.
Speaker 4:But let me start off this way.
Speaker 4:Yeah let me say this OK, we'll talk offline. I'm committing a certain amount of money to people, to scholarships, that people that come into your organization that don't have the means or insurance to pay. I'm committing a certain amount of money right now to champion those children, for your organization and us to do something and I'm hoping Modi will do some kind of a show on a grand level that will raise a ton of money and you'll hopefully contribute money towards that also, where we can put together a scholarship fund for these children and young adults and people that can't afford and have no opportunity to get any help. I'm talking about both kinds of help the actual training and I'm talking about the emotional help that gets a person through the day so that they don't feel Menuchas, ha-nefesh guys, is everything OK? I pray for it.
Speaker 4:You know just lightness of the heart. You know that we have a day that we just don't aren't overcome with difficulties and these children. I think from what I've seen, you know, in the last week, since you asked me to come on, and I've actually studied some of this, you know, is overwhelming to me, and so I'm willing, whether you do a show or not, I'm willing because I'm looking for something and I think I think I want to ride that. I want to ride that with you and your dad. So I think it's a great opportunity that we've joined today. By the way, just I know we're 10, 50.
Speaker 4:I'm just going to say this. It's a funny thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:So you know, I never like going to a courtroom unprepared, so, like I'm going to meet this famous speech guy, you know, phil Schneider. So I'm, you know, yelling at my people in the office get me everything on Phil Schneider, you know, get me volumes, you know. And they're sending me things. And you know my son-in-law, my son-in-law, shows me that in WhatsApp there's a new like AI, right. So he says, watch this. You know you could ask him anything. So I say, send me stuff on Phil Schneider. You know, on Phil Schneider, anyway, sends me stuff. They send me these documentaries. Ok, whatever, it's documentaries. I'm laying in bed, like you know, two o'clock in the morning and I'm watching one of these documentaries. It's on UFOs you know it's an UFOs.
Speaker 4:I'm saying myself. The guy was also a UFO, like a famous UFO doctor you know, phil Schneider you've got the UFO guy.
Speaker 2:So if you go to look up the YouTube video, it's like 10,000 hits and comments. Yeah, oh, it's the wrong Dr Phil, there's a guy. Phil Schneider, who was a conspiracy theorist who disappeared.
Speaker 3:And so when you look up.
Speaker 4:I'm calling my people.
Speaker 2:I'm yelling at them.
Speaker 4:You sent me the wrong Schneider. I go you crazy. It's spelled this way, not that way. And then I realize it's that AI thing, right, the dangers of AI, right, Right, People have to talk, the dangers of AI. So anyway, dad's got to make sure that you know. You know he comes up first, absolutely, that's great.
Speaker 1:How can people reach out to your organization and find out about you? What are the websites? The easy thing is Schneiderspeechcom.
Speaker 2:That's the private practice. Spell it out S-C-H-N-E-I-D-E-R-S-P-E-E-C-Hcom. That's our private practice, and we have offices in person and we also have teletherapy. We also have. We've always wanted to make sure that we don't just help people who have resources and have means and when we don't have partners to provide scholarships. We created something called transcendingxcom T-R-A-N-S-C-E-N-D-I-N-G-Xcom Create a podcast called transcending stuttering and we have a community around that, a private online community for people who stutter, a private online community for therapists who want to learn how to do this life-changing work, and so in this way, we're reaching a global audience of people and transcending financial barriers, geographic barriers or barriers, because, in the end, when human beings learn how to be their best and they can bring out the best in other people. I think the key from Arthur's story is his grandmother put a belief in his head of Mashiach energy. Mashiach is believing that the world to come will come.
Speaker 2:Even though I don't see it right now. I look around, the world is upside down. It's the furthest thing from, but I have a belief that it can happen. And when you put that belief into a person, that's the agent of change. And I think, as much as Arthur talks about the therapist and not to downplay the therapist, when my father and I interview people like yourselves, it might be interesting to hear from you, moti, what was the change, what was the game change? What drove you to be able to transcend stuttering or however you think about it? Most people say it was a certain person, a certain adult, a certain caring. It might be a teacher, a family member, a parent. So I think that's the key. It's really highlighting if parents are asking what they can do, if teachers are asking, listen to, what changes a kid's life? It's putting belief that they could be somebody, that they could do something that they doubt they could do. What was the change for you?
Speaker 1:What was the biggest thing you did From Moti into your documentary? I remember when I realized I was a stutterer, when it was, I think, first or second grade, and I was asked we had to say something and I said it and the teacher said, wow, that came out perfect. So I go, are you saying everything else I've been saying has not come out perfect? And that's when I realized, oh, I have a problem. And I don't know what the other thing was. I'll tell you a funny thing.
Speaker 1:With your grandmother, I was a horrible student. So at Hofstra University, which is far from the five towns, there was a program that my mother used to drive me to and wait for me, and it didn't help a thing. It was the effort that she came in. She used to drive we should drive back and forth and we used to listen to Avan Fried and Yom Go On in the tapes, back in the tapes. Yeah, and it didn't help a thing. And, like your grandmother said, you're special, you're this. I remember this so clearly.
Speaker 1:We were in the guidance counselor's office and he's saying to my mother Modi's very, very smart and very, very. She goes, he's not so smart, but he's not an idiot. My mother literally said that he's not so smart, but he's not an idiot, he doesn't have to be in the remedial class. She wanted to keep me out of the remedial class. I can and I should stay in the regular class.
Speaker 1:I would have loved that other class. Instead of I swear to God, my mother said you know my mother, she is my mother's zero edit. Nothing just comes right out. But a big change in my life besides learning my techniques alone was taking voice lessons Was when I was taking voice lessons and they showed me how to put everything up front, take it out from back here and put it all in the facial mask, and then you know, that was a big, that was a big, big difference in my speech. So if I can catch that breath before I go and then move it to the front rather than back here, he-he instead of hey, it's a big, big difference in my that means, do you?
Speaker 2:do that while you're speaking in the background. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're thinking about your tone of focus.
Speaker 1:Yeah, especially if I'm about to go into a bit, I grab the air and then and then bring the bit out like that in the front voice, do you ever let that out Now in 10 minutes. Not yelling, but loud on stage. You can't, unless you'd have no voice.
Speaker 2:Do you ever let that down? Like let that like just put let it go.
Speaker 3:What do you mean? Not focus on that?
Speaker 2:Like when you're at home having an intimate conversation. Are you also doing that?
Speaker 1:No, no, because you're at home. That's a performance. Yeah, it's a performance.
Speaker 2:I think for kids, when parents start reminding their kids remember, do your voice thing, do your breathing thing, yeah, that's not where a kid should be so self-conscious. Like tremendous respect to Arthur's fit, every time right, but I imagine, arthur, there are times you put on pajamas and I'm sure they're lovely too.
Speaker 1:I'm sure they're gorgeous.
Speaker 2:I'm sure they're silk stunning and his name is everywhere, arthur.
Speaker 3:They're like Julian Schnabel and on the back it says schluf gesundre hei.
Speaker 4:Guys, I don't wanna disappoint anybody, but I sleep in my underwear.
Speaker 2:Perfect. Well, that's even better.
Speaker 4:By the way, very nice underwear, but sure.
Speaker 2:I don't even wanna start visioning that, but my father's line is nobody should feel they have to dress in formal attire and talk in a formal, controlled way all the time, right. So we have to tell kids they can just be themselves and equip them with the ability to dress up when they want to, to have that new gear in their transmission, that they can kick it into that gear when and where they want to.
Speaker 4:Because I think that and the takeaway from the documentaries were that kids felt that by always being on in that way, they lost their voice. It wasn't them. And there was a very interesting piece where your dad asked a young child to take breaths between each, and they asked them. Well, and the child was much more fluent when he would concentrate very hard on taking breaths. And then your father asked them how difficult was that on a scale of one to 10? And this was a very young, astute child and said you know, that was like an eight. And then he says just talk now.
Speaker 2:He says which way do you feel better? Which way, which way do you prefer?
Speaker 4:And he said and the other way was he was painfully blocking and stuttering and trying to get through just a couple of words and it looked like this was the most painful experience you would ever go through as a child. And when your father says which was easier for you, he said the other way, where I'm blocking on every word and stuttering because it's a natural. This is how I am and, yeah, I could be more fluent, but it takes enormous effort and I'm also I'm always on. I am never without being aware of a word that I might block on, and there have been a number of them in this hour where I just substituted or canceled.
Speaker 1:Well, whenever I speak to you, whenever you ask you a question, you always do this thing with your face you go and then you answer.
Speaker 4:That may not always be, but there are different things You're always like I don't know if that's how you should do it, modi. Right, it'd be like yeah yeah, but that might just be my-. And then the big pause.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, but I don't think that that pause-. Where was it that you wanna ask me about that? Look, look, look, look, look, look look.
Speaker 4:I'm like right away yeah, there have been a lot of things that I've adapted over the years that have helped me. As I said, I had extensive training and it was using a lot of different methods and I didn't. The interesting thing is was I didn't learn any of those methods from your dad. Your dad really focused on the emotional relationships and emotional, and I wanted to. I thought we were gonna get into that today.
Speaker 2:I'll say one word about it Is that the techniques and the tools are not rocket science.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you don't need a documentary on that.
Speaker 2:That's right. You can give me practically any person in the room. I can help them get the words out like this. The question is the magic how do you bring it to life? How do you make it a new, comfortable skin to be comfortable in your own skin and to be able to do this easy?
Speaker 4:But I wanna say In real life, but I wanna say, with this therapist, arthur Jacobs, who's now a much older man, I did this. You know, 40 years ago we used to go across the street to the mall, going to the store With you. That was one of the techniques. Yes, we physically went to those difficult places that the phone we started off with the phone call the airlines and we had all this video taped and tape recorded how I sounded when we first began, how I sounded two years later, how I sounded four years later. And then we would go across the street, go into a restaurant, order something you know where. You would hear on the videos a young girl who was panicked. She would be in a bathroom, she would go to the bathroom deliberately at a time when she would have to order to avoid having to order, and she'd stay in the bathroom long enough so that she wouldn't have to, so that she'd make sure her mother ordered.
Speaker 4:Wow, I need to. We need to challenge that and we need to. And it exists and it's alive and it's well. And I'm sorry to an organization that I may have been critical of on the last podcast, where they seem to have really been focused on giving children a community and a voice and a place. I was overly critical of that where I said, no, give them therapy, get them on the streets, get them out there, because one day they're not gonna be in this beautiful community. I apologize for that because I see from the things that I learned from you and your dad that you know that is equally, if not a lot more, important. But I think together those things could be very powerful.
Speaker 2:You gotta feel good you gotta feel well, then you can speak well and then you can be best.
Speaker 1:Yes, Be best. Thank you, melania Trump. Okay, so all DMs and all questions should go directly to Schneider speech spelt with C's and I before E's and all kinds of ways that you'll figure out.
Speaker 2:It's EI actually. Yeah, I have no idea, but we also have on Instagram at Schneider speech.
Speaker 1:I before. E was the worst thing ever in school for me Except for all the exceptions right, except for the exceptions and then a nightmare for me, anyway. So they should all reach out to you directly and talk to you about what they can do for their children and whoever else is in their life that has stuttering. We are so happy that you joined us. Thank you so much for the story about the Rebbe. Wow, did not see that coming. That was really a sacred encounter that we just had today. Arthur, I can't thank you enough for dressing the way you did today. This is just. You killed it. You slayed. Every slayed, slayed Again. Thank you again to Whites and Luxembourg for being our partners and collaborators and making this happen, and thanks to A&H provisions, and thank you all for listening. I am wow.
Speaker 1:Modylivecom, be the friend that brings the friends to the comedy show. By the time this airs, there'll be shows still available. A matinee I have a matinee in San Diego. Improv shows in Hollywood is sold out. Then we have Kennedy Center sold out. St Louis, ladies and gentlemen, st Louis is gonna be an off the hook show. We are in. Help me here. I forgot where I'm going. Modylivecom, find the show near you or show near friends. Send them the link. Be the friend that brings the friends to the comedy show that is MoshiachEnergy ModyLivecom Periel, anything.
Speaker 3:I am at Periel and I'm here to help you. I have my own Ash and Brand on Instagram.
Speaker 1:For now.
Speaker 3:For now, mody's trying to change my name, and all my upcoming shows and endeavors are on there.
Speaker 1:Thank you. Anything you want to plug for you? No, I just want to say thank you, the most important thing for people who stutter is.
Speaker 2:I'm one to keep talking and for the world to listen, we need to learn to listen to each other. Everybody has to learn to listen to other people, and people who stutter just need that chance to be heard. You're gonna be happy you did. You can hear great things, Great.
Speaker 1:Thank you all very much.