Episode 96

Episode 96: The AH"M crew covers everything from colonoscopies to hypochondria, plus that one time Modi had to smoke a cigarette (for a movie)!

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Transcript

Discussing Openings, Costumes, and a Colonoscopy

Speaker 1 0:00

Welcome to Andy's Modi.

Speaker 3 0:11

How does it go?

Speaker 1 0:22

And that's when Leo goes. Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready for a great show? And then he goes. Are you ready for a great show? Please help me welcome Modi. That's how I begin my shows.

Speaker 4 0:37

Leo's in the back.

Speaker 1 0:39

That's the opening. We're trying to figure out a better song to walk on to.

Speaker 4 0:44

I already know a good walk on song. The killer's called the man, but just the first 29 seconds of it before there's any lyrics.

Speaker 1 0:54

OK, by the way, the song that I walk on to in the comedy special is a great song.

Speaker 4 1:01

What's that one? It's like an instrument.

Speaker 3 1:04

You're going to die when you hear it. I can't wait.

Speaker 1 1:11

It's like every 1970s, 80s, what's it called? Game show host. Welcome to. The Price is Right. It's really good.

Speaker 3 1:27

I can't wait to see that. Should we say hello to everybody first?

Speaker 1 1:32

Well, everybody, shulam aleikhem tu. And here's Modi. We're back in the studio and we, of course, begin with a chorus. I think it's good and also thankful, being being in appreciation to our sponsors. A and H provisions Glut, kosher foods, that's top of the line, a number one, king of the hill. A and H. A and H. So, good that even the guayim understand that this flash is gashmack and delicious Best hot dogs in the world. Use promo code MODI for your first order and you get 30% off. And their website is wwwkosherdogsnet.

Speaker 1 2:27

Men and whites, and Luxembourg, the law firm that not only does well, they do good, they're very philanthropic. They are a part of our family here Arthur, luxembourg close friend, and Randy, who listens to this and tells Arthur what happens on the podcast, and that's basically it. Whitesandluxcom.

Speaker 3 2:53

Whitesandluxcom, w-e-i-t-z or Whitesluxcom. So I just want to say that my Halloween costume. Yes. Was a nod to A and H, because I got dressed up despite Leo's.

Speaker 4 3:12

I don't know if they're going to want this nod.

Speaker 3 3:14

Well, maybe they don't have to take it, then they don't have to take it. I got dressed up as a hot dog with a name tag that said Ann.

Speaker 4 3:27

Ann Ann Frank.

Speaker 1 3:29

Modi. Oh, ann Frank, wow yeah.

Speaker 4 3:34

Wow. For the record, I advised against the costume beforehand.

Speaker 1 3:39

I don't I. Whenever you can mention anything about the Holocaust, whenever you can, even if it's in it, brings it through, brings it to light through a joke. Do it Because some people go Ann Frank, what does that mean? And you tell her that's a girl, that you should Google and read her book.

Speaker 3 3:57

That's exactly what I said when I got accosted for wearing the costume. I said Modi told me. Somebody said are you making fun of Ann Frank? And I said God forbid.

Speaker 1 4:09

You're bringing it to light. You think people would never heard of who Ann Frank was or is. They might be like Ann Frank, like what's that, and then tell them, google it, and they might order the book and read the diary and share with their friends. We, as a comedian, as comedians and people that write jokes for comedians that's how you bring it to light. When I mentioned Holocaust Museum, it's not to make fun of the Holocaust Museum, it's that someone goes. What is a Holocaust Museum?

Speaker 3 4:42

I wish I wore the costume on the show today.

Speaker 1 4:45

I'm so happy you didn't. I'm so happy you did not wear that costume. Thank you for not wearing the costume on the show today.

Speaker 3 4:52

It was so brilliant.

Speaker 4 4:54

I'm sure. No, you dressed as that and as Golden Mayure yeah, I had another costume.

Speaker 3 4:59

Because we welcomed all of these new Israeli families who fled Israel and I felt like I wanted to give all of these kids, you know you have like a flash of a memory of something when you were little.

Speaker 4 5:10

Yeah.

Speaker 3 5:13

I wanted the kids to maybe remember like their first Halloween in New York, instead of remembering that they had to flee their country.

Speaker 1 5:21

Oh, that's great.

Speaker 3 5:22

And so we threw this big Halloween party. And I got all the kids pumpkins with a bunch of other things and I got the kids pumpkins with a bunch of other local moms. We got all the kids like little pumpkin trick or treat baskets and I got dressed up as Golden Mayure.

Speaker 4 5:36

That's cute. That's very cute, that's very nice.

Speaker 3 5:40

And I learned that Jewish kids across the world are getting a garbage Jewish education because nobody had any idea who I was.

Speaker 4 5:47

No one knew who Golden Mayure was, no one knew who Gold.

Speaker 3 5:50

They just it's such like an obvious costume, if you know anything about.

Speaker 1 5:55

No, I'm if anything Ben Gurion, not Ben Gurion.

Speaker 3 6:03

Moshe Dian with the pad.

Speaker 1 6:04

Moshe Dian is the patch that's a hot costume. Moshe Dian. If you don't know, leo is the big general that was that led Israel in a few wars and and insane.

Speaker 3 6:17

I had with an eye patch, iconic, iconic.

Speaker 1 6:21

I even had a joke that I did with Ilan Gold on stage. I when we're talking about how Israelis always try to yeah, that's hard to updo each other.

Speaker 3 6:29

Yeah.

Speaker 1 6:29

I said I knew Moshe Dian he was. I said I am the one that told him put the patch on the left side, that's a hero, on the right side, you're a pirate. And so that was one of the jokes that people know who Moshe Dian is, but the most iconic of any single Israeli politician is Menachem Begin.

Speaker 3 6:51

More than Golda, more than.

Speaker 1 6:52

Golda Menachem Begin was was epic. He was a Holocaust survivor and when he spoke he spoke in that old Hebrew that might try to say. That's like it's so epic, that was amazing.

Speaker 1 7:24

Whatever just babbling Like, if you see the face of Israel and there's an epic video of him I don't know what year it was when Israel was just forming and and and they were doing something at some war, and of course the whole world was against them. And Germany, the Chancellor of Germany, said that Israel shouldn't bomb and shouldn't whatever. And then he goes and the Chancellor of Germany. He said to us what to do. It's so epic.

Speaker 1 8:03

He's by far the most. I didn't know you had that character, golda Meir. When she spoke she was American. I don't know if you know.

Speaker 3 8:11

She's from Milwaukee.

Speaker 1 8:12

Milwaukee. I had a fake cigarette Speaking of which I will be in Milwaukee. This will be airing after this.

Speaker 4 8:20

And the Milwaukee show you guys have to get vintage T shirts.

Speaker 3 8:24

In Milwaukee they have. It's like the home of Sturgis Harley Davidson.

Speaker 1 8:29

Isn't also where happy days was?

Speaker 3 8:32

Very well yes.

Speaker 1 8:35

Happy days was a show, Leo, that was on the air Happy days. And I have to wake up for this podcast. Now Put your feet off the ground. I had an ice match, a lot.

Speaker 4 8:44

You better. Do you want the rest of my Celsius? I know I've been up early. I was up early today, I know.

Speaker 1 8:52

I wasn't because I had a colonoscopy.

Speaker 3 8:57

Today no.

Speaker 1 8:59

Yesterday, yesterday.

Speaker 4 9:01

Oh, it was fun, it was the only day we could schedule in our calendar with the doctor I have been putting this colonoscopy over for baby two years.

Speaker 3 9:11

Really, I just didn't have time for it. Was it your first one?

Speaker 1 9:14

My first one. Wow, shashayanavi Qimanovic, geno Manaze Boire.

Speaker 3 9:18

Preyagaf again Tell me.

Speaker 1 9:23

It was just my God. First of all it was at NYU. I guess they have a department that just owns this colonoscopy. Is you go there and it's a factory. I think they did 84 that day, or my doctor told me he did three before he got to me and has a whole rest of the day doing them.

Speaker 3 9:43

Did you have to drink that stuff?

Speaker 1 9:45

Yeah, can you tell me, because I'm getting my first one in like a few weeks they give you this medication, these two bottles, and I say at 4 PM you drink one full bottle and then drink Five or eight glasses of eight ounce water. Yeah, I just chucked a lot, a lot, a lot of water and I listen, doing nothing. This is done nothing for me. I'm fine, I'm home, I'm staying home. I'd they said stay home in case you got to be near a toilet. And then when I went to the toilet I Think it went all the way into Into 408 I Just bam Everything. When I did it again and then I was there, I was completely cleaned.

Speaker 1 10:33

I fasted the whole two day. I love a good fast anyway. Oh, by the way, which is really tells me I love to fast. It's fun to fast, especially like not a young kipper fast and you can't drink, or drink coffee or drink water. It was like a fat. I had basically a day and a half of fasting but I could have water and tea. And then what was amazing was when I broke the fast, it wasn't on a young kipper break fast with his bagels and cake and fruit, and it was just. Leo ordered me a sandwich and Some borscht and I had a nice break fast and it was lovely.

Speaker 3 11:07

Okay, that's really nice. I'm really more interested in the part that you have to like drink this stuff, which I've been told is just revolting not it's.

Speaker 1 11:16

It's this big bubble ball.

Speaker 3 11:17

You just chug it, it has some kind of a flavor in it and you cannot leave the apartment Like you have to be chained to the toilet.

Speaker 1 11:24

I have to drink a lot of water and then do it and then, um, this is so gross. And then you just, yeah, and you just blows your ass out. It just blows your ass out and that's it, and it feels great and it you're done and you feel clean. And then you go to the guy and you sit in a chair and then the chair becomes the bed and then the guy tells you the anesthesiologist says please roll over on your left side, he right, roll over. And then he puts that stuff in me and I know you're awake for.

Speaker 3 11:56

No, no, you're completely out. I said to the anesthesiologist.

Speaker 1 11:59

I said I don't know how much they pay you here standing your pajamas, but if you want to come to our house every day around 11, 11, 30 after the news, we'll be happy to pay whatever. Because he put me out, it was. I mean, I would hope so. It was so good.

Speaker 3 12:18

And then I've been told it's like the best sleep best sleep in your life. It's proper fall, right, it's what Michael Jackson used to take to go to sleep.

Speaker 4 12:25

Oh it's general anesthesia, as, yeah, they put you under general general for.

Speaker 3 12:29

Have you had those?

Speaker 4 12:31

have. I had a colonoscopy.

Speaker 3 12:32

You're too young, I haven't had a colonoscopy.

Speaker 1 12:34

I had it, no. And then he says he came down and it was um and it was just all.

Speaker 4 12:40

It was just You're listening to this and you're over the. If you're at that age where you're supposed to be getting screened and you haven't done it yet, it's not a big deal. Go do it, yes.

Speaker 1 12:49

I go do it. Yeah, psa, go get your colonoscopy. It's amazing. And then, like he even I even saw how the camera before I went under he's like the cameras are taking pictures of the room, like. And then he's, like, you know, looking for the. When he had this thing, I'm like, yeah, he goes, this is what we go into to look with. I go for what a parking spot.

Speaker 3 13:12

But he went in and he and, and it was that you groggy after you had to pick him up, right, you're not?

Speaker 4 13:18

picked him up, I got a text from NYU being like the patient is ready, and I Sprinted down because I thought they were gonna give me a little bit of warning or something like that. You were in recovery or whatever. So I I ran down. It was a few blocks away and I Expected you to be like kind of groggy or like lying down. You were fully in conversation, getting dressed. The nurse was like had her arms like up in the air around you because she was Thought you were gonna fall.

Speaker 1 13:42

No, I was like oh no, honey, he's like a tank, he's fine. No, I also. It's not my first time coming out of a drug. You know it was we've we've recovered from this stuff before, but it was very easy. Dr S N E L L, I smell smell smell he should change it. No, it was lovely guy, lovely guy, yeah, everybody there was. It was just very nice. It was a very easy procedure and I good luck with yours.

Speaker 4 14:15

Good luck probably should do one.

Speaker 3 14:17

No, I'm gonna sign up for any medical procedure.

Speaker 4 14:21

Something's happening with me. I am like developing more hypercondria, like hypercondiac behaviors at them, getting older like burrat rapidly, like it's because you Google stuff. In the last Couple of months I think it's increased like tenfold, like I want an MRI, I want a colonoscopy, I want an endoscopy, I want a cat skin.

Speaker 3 14:42

Are you sure you're not doing?

Speaker 4 14:44

they should have that package. They should be able to sell you the hypercondiac package.

Speaker 1 14:48

They should say you're not of age for any of this all I want is a municipal bond that pays over 8% and doesn't get taxed by the New York state, or that's all I'm looking for the doctor's officer should sell the package. I'm googling. I'm a mutual. A municipal bond is one medical do that and he's googling. What does it mean if my toe hurts, if my stomach hurts, if I'm not feeling well, if I can't breathe right?

Speaker 3 15:08

and you're so not a Hypocon, he's so not.

Speaker 1 15:10

So now I.

Speaker 4 15:12

Yeah, I'm convinced some I need, I want something, and it's right they should sell a package of like just the full body screen. They have that every time.

Speaker 1 15:22

I did get a prescription.

Speaker 4 15:24

You have to do this.

Speaker 3 15:25

No, no, no, that's it. You can't just walk in called.

Discussion on Plastic Surgery and Maintenance

Speaker 1 15:28

Ezra and they it's just, you had an MRI there, yeah, I. Okay, this is where we're going with the conversation, okay, but there's a. They. They find MRI machines or cat scan machines that are not not being used and instead of them not being used and Usually a charge I don't know what they charge the insurance companies but like they let you pay out of your pocket, not in a crazy amount, like a one, two thousand dollars, and you get a full MRI and see a full cat scan of your body.

Speaker 3 15:59

It's like spot hero, but for a lot of guys do it before they start doing steroids.

Speaker 1 16:05

They want to make sure that there's no lumps or or anything gross, because when you do steroids, your your body. Who do you know is doing steroids? All those guys, and not me, I'm not you, but people that do steroids they do they this, this full body scan, people who are doing steroids.

Speaker 4 16:21

Send me a DM. I want to know where you're getting them and then and that's so.

Speaker 1 16:25

That's what they do.

Speaker 3 16:26

Every time he tells me he has some doctor thing I'm like is this aesthetic or medical?

Speaker 4 16:31

No, it's all medical. It's all medical.

Speaker 1 16:35

I thought I'm maybe, but we are looking into some aesthetic stuff soon too.

Speaker 4 16:40

Yeah, I do know which plastic surgeons I want. It's just an order of operations at this point.

Speaker 1 16:45

We're gonna, I need, I should we talk about my eyes? I think need to just a little bit of a just Maintain some mystique about a mistake. Okay.

Speaker 4 16:53

Well.

Speaker 3 16:54

I have a couple of girlfriends who have done that, that I think. It's called a bleph that they just blaspheme Bluff I blast no, they like cut out like a little piece. Yeah, it's called a bluff.

Speaker 1 17:05

I call an eye bris. They take a breath.

Speaker 3 17:11

God.

Speaker 4 17:12

I want buckle fat removal. What and I want? Here, the bleph, and you don't need the left. There's me, isn't any that, but I think it would look nice on me. No, no, maybe a brow lift.

Speaker 1 17:24

Oh my god.

Speaker 3 17:25

You have to stop.

Speaker 1 17:26

He's insane. He's not well, he's not well. You know that we're barrage.

Speaker 3 17:31

He had his boyfriend Scott, or have plastic surgery to look like him if there's any plastic surgeons listening to this, feel free to DM me.

Speaker 4 17:41

We can know that we.

Speaker 1 17:42

I think we found the right one.

Speaker 3 17:43

I'm not gonna do. That really is he hilarious.

Speaker 4 17:46

He gets right, he'll look. You see what I've done to my body.

Speaker 1 17:50

Yes, but what have you done to you? About nothing by that has a by that looks like he's on steroids, but he's not on steroids. There's not. It's insane.

Speaker 3 18:00

You're not allowed to do anything else Until you're like in like 20 years.

Speaker 1 18:05

We can talk about it when you're pushing no okay, so you obviously are not in the 30 year old world conversations. They are all doing stuff early. Yeah, to prevent.

Speaker 4 18:17

Yeah, insane I don't think it's insane, because I think anyone who you see, who's older, who looks great, who has had worked on, they don't tell you oh, I started a few years ago, like it's a slow but steady process.

Speaker 3 18:31

No, that's how you wind up looking like Michael Jackson. No, that Michael.

Speaker 4 18:34

Jackson is an extreme that's yeah, there's not.

Speaker 1 18:38

Now you're going way crazy. There's plenty of people walking around who get regular little nips and tux and just to yeah, because you can do little things now, like my mom and my aunt together went and they did a full facelift.

Speaker 4 18:53

Like back in the day, that was another technology for that is so much better. Yeah, crazy things.

Speaker 1 18:59

The face went right back and my mom had her neck done was really done by a really good doctor, but she looks great and actually helped her now, now that she's 80. She looks, it looks good.

Speaker 3 19:10

How old is she? He's 80. I know, but how old does she look?

Speaker 1 19:12

Yeah, your mom looks good. My mom looks good. My mom doesn't look like an 80 year old my mom and she has like a young, like a youthful appearance to her. So it's it's like a and she keeps it together.

Speaker 3 19:23

So I should get a facelift.

Speaker 4 19:25

If you're getting a facelift, it needs to be a deep, plain facelift.

Speaker 3 19:27

I'm not getting a facelift.

Speaker 4 19:29

I know all the verbiage.

Speaker 3 19:30

Look at him actually checking me out.

Speaker 1 19:32

She was hoping you'd say, oh, you don't need one, I will never tell anyone they don't need something.

Speaker 3 19:37

I did not think he was going to say that for the record.

Speaker 4 19:41

No one needs it. It's if you want it. I don't know. I'm obsessed with, with the idea of like getting an intermission and then like getting a whole new face, like halfway through life, oh sounds so fun.

Speaker 1 19:54

I've had friends that you know. I'm at the age now where where you have friends that you don't see, like 10 years. I haven't seen you in 10 years, 15 years, oh my God, I haven't seen you in 15 years. And sometimes you see somebody and you don't recognize them. But you know, you know them and they tell you blank blank the name. You know, oh my God, and they literally just go. I've had a lot of work done.

Speaker 4 20:18

I think that's not my goal, not the goal, not my goal for me is slow, steady progress towards maintaining basically how my face looks now. Ok, so here's the thing that anyone have a painting that could keep it me in their attic?

Speaker 3 20:34

Here's the thing I feel like I am never going to be as hot as I was when I was 28 years old.

Discussion on Smoking and Addiction

Speaker 1 20:43

That's not the point, and we've had this kind of point on the podcast Point, missing the point Looking like you don't need you looking and you won't, and then don't need you trying to look like a 20 year old. Look like the best version of you, right, like the best version of you, and that's it, I quit smoking.

Speaker 3 21:00

That's all I've got.

Speaker 1 21:02

Good for you. You quit, you smoked.

Speaker 3 21:04

Yeah. Um well, I told you you see me smoking. Yeah, I've seen you smoking. I've never seen you smoke in my life.

Speaker 4 21:12

Yes, outside of the cellar. Yeah, really Fae, I will say you smoke.

Speaker 3 21:19

No, I, not anymore. Oh my God, this is where the judgment is.

Speaker 1 21:25

Yes, yes, don't smoke. What's wrong with you? What happened?

Speaker 3 21:29

to. I grew up in a house where every smoke and she stopped and she stopped, my mother stopped, and then she's living now to 80. Ok, but I stopped too.

Speaker 1 21:38

Yeah, that's not, that's not the that's not the only fun thing I had left. It's a form of suicide. I think it's just a form of suicide. It's a slow suicide. It's when you hate your life. Maybe it's OK. I shouldn't hear that, probably.

Speaker 3 21:52

We're 100 percent hearing that yeah.

Speaker 4 21:54

I don't know what Talk about it.

Speaker 1 21:58

I just think it's a form of suicide, like a little hey, how's things going? I'm going to go kill myself a little bit outside right now. I'm going to go outside and kill myself a little bit.

Speaker 4 22:07

I'm going to have a death break.

Speaker 1 22:08

I'm going to have a death break A cigarette break it's little micro doses. I'm going to go in the middle of your work when you're stuck in your cubicle with the wall, with the carpeted walls in the cubicle. You know I'm going to go kill myself a little bit downstairs and you go, stay in traffic. I've never been to the Avenue and you stay. You stay in traffic on Lexington Avenue and you're just smoking and you know.

Speaker 3 22:29

OK, stop. Have you ever smoked a cigarette?

Speaker 1 22:32

in my life I have smoked a cigarette. I have never smoked a cigarette. I will elaborate. I was in a movie with Brooke Shields Hot, ok. The movie is called my Italian Husband, or my Perfect Husband I forgot the name of it and I played the son of a restaurant owner and I had to smoke. Don't they give you like film, like they gave me real cigarettes and I never in my life inhaled and I learned how to inhale and I inhaled and I looked good smoking.

Speaker 3 23:03

Uh-huh.

Speaker 1 23:04

It's called my Perfect Husband or my Italian. Husband.

Speaker 4 23:08

It's like SAG or something where they're not supposed to make you.

Speaker 1 23:11

No, I went, I went.

Speaker 4 23:12

I don't know what the SAG was and I thought they give you like special ones made to look like you're smoking, that are fake.

Speaker 3 23:20

That's what Aleph Baldwin thought.

Speaker 1 23:21

I'm sure the budget was, I'm sure the budget all went into Brooke Shields price and they didn't have price for the cigarettes.

Speaker 4 23:27

So that doesn't count. You pretending to smoke a cigarette for a scene is not, but it was a cigarette and I inhaled.

Speaker 1 23:33

I learned how to inhale. Did you like it? I know, and I knew it was gross and you smell like that's my thing, you smell like well.

Speaker 3 23:41

We'll even OK so you smoked one cigarette in your life.

Speaker 1 23:44

No, I mean I had to learn how to do on a few. I mean, if you had a few takes, so maybe you get like a little head rush. No, I didn't, and you have never smoked a cigarette.

Speaker 4 23:53

Never smoked a cigarette.

Speaker 3 23:54

I hope you never do. But I want to tell you something, both of you. Yeah, smoking is a very complex addiction because it's a real bonding moment.

Speaker 4 24:08

That's what people like it. Yeah right, Other smokers, other suicidal people.

Speaker 3 24:12

What do you have to say about like David Tell, for example?

Speaker 1 24:16

Oh my God, is he dying to end it already? Yeah, of course. That's why he's changed smoke and he changed, but he when Dave smokes. I don't know if you've seen the cigarettes.

Speaker 3 24:25

I've smoked cigarettes with him.

Speaker 1 24:26

Little chuchkas and patches because they put it on. He puts on top of the cigarette His one of his best jokes. He goes I smoke American spirits and Indian cigarette. It's supposed to be really good because they, of course, wouldn't want you to die. He's one of his best, I think one of his best jokes. And then he puts these filters and he doesn't smoke all the way. By the way, I was told that if you shouldn't smoke the cigarette all the way because the really bad part is at the end, sure, no, no, I was just.

Speaker 4 24:56

The good part is they put all the vitamins and minerals at the front.

Speaker 1 24:59

At the end, all the, all the stuff that really kills you is more it makes sense Also.

Speaker 4 25:04

it's just you've been smoking on a burning piece of paper for longer at that point too.

Speaker 3 25:08

So OK, but it's a very enjoyable break from life.

Speaker 4 25:18

Well, it's the actual, like biological dependence on nicotine that you develop, and that's the social bonding aspect. And then it's also the. What I hear from people who are trying to quit, who find it difficult, is the routine. So like the moments in which they would normally have a cigarette, like waiting for the bus, or like waiting, or like in the morning or this. They don't know how to restructure that time.

Speaker 1 25:39

So then, or when we were in, France in between every bite that anybody had to make they went outside to smoke. And then there's the whole thing when you pack the cigarette, yeah, yeah, and you clap it and you're talking about it. You have a light. You have a light.

Speaker 2 25:54

I got a light. You have a light. You have a light, light, light.

Speaker 1 25:56

There, you go. I got a light, never did the cigarette.

Speaker 4 26:00

It's a ritual.

Speaker 3 26:01

It's very ritualistic.

Speaker 4 26:02

It's a ritual. It's a ritual yeah.

Speaker 3 26:04

So I stopped for years. I smoked forever and quit and smoked and quit and smoked. And the only time now that I smoke again is when I go to Israel, because everybody smokes there and there's no judgment around it Everybody smokes.

Speaker 4 26:20

I guess that's why everyone smokes in France, because there's no judgment.

Speaker 3 26:23

Right here there's judgment.

Speaker 1 26:24

Here's the judgment yeah.

Speaker 3 26:25

There people are like smoking and like ashing on top of like their baby stroller.

Speaker 1 26:30

It's so gross. I'm so sorry I'm coming out judging on smoking. I'm sorry, but I just I wish all my, I wish all my fans and listeners, I wish you gizunt health and that's not in smoking and I'm sorry, it's an addiction that that's probably very hard to. That I'm sure is very hard to to. There is God that I? The three things that I'm not addicted to is drinking. I have no tolerance or desire to drink alcohols or any of that. Smoking and gambling.

Speaker 3 27:00

Yeah.

Speaker 1 27:00

Those are three that are like I'll be a big ones. I look. Thank you, god, that's not my journey.

Speaker 3 27:08

I think smoking is probably the easiest one to quit out of those three. Really, really, I think so. Overgambling yeah, oh, yeah, wow. I mean I'm not smoking. Cigarettes are the only thing I've ever been addicted to, but I understand how people are alcoholics and get addicted to gambling and also how they're addicted to heroin.

Speaker 1 27:32

The addiction is so heroin is a chemical thing in your body.

Speaker 3 27:37

So it's nicotine is more addictive than heroin gambling is.

Speaker 1 27:41

the sad part is a lot of those people in Vegas we saw have alcoholism, smoking problems and gambling all in one shot, pressing a button on a machine that does jeopardy, or Aladdin, or whatever the machine was ding, ding, ding. Oh my God.

Speaker 3 27:56

I, I'm an. I'm a in recovery smoker because I'm not smoking, but I you know smell.

Speaker 4 28:04

It doesn't make you want to smoke.

Speaker 3 28:05

Oh yeah.

Speaker 4 28:06

Oh yeah.

Speaker 3 28:07

I'm still on the patch. I've been on the patch for like two years. I'm bad. Where did it go.

Speaker 1 28:13

You're on the patch and and I'm guys nerves, those are the two things you're on these days. I'm a good person. He must want to be, he must want to send you over to.

Speaker 3 28:22

Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 28:25

He can't stand me.

Speaker 4 28:27

I'm sure I was, I could bleep it out.

Speaker 3 28:33

Say it no. Yeah, thankfully, yeah, I'm not a smoker and I also never jumped on the vaping bandwagon.

Speaker 1 28:43

That's disgusting Every day. No, we're so judgey.

Speaker 3 28:45

Oh my.

Speaker 1 28:46

God, everybody's so sensitive when you showed me that thing about Lennox on a oh God, okay. So, by the way and let's discuss this is a like again. Everybody, you are listening to this podcast just to relax your brain from anything serious in the world. You can leave them alone there, okay, okay. So two things I want to discuss.

Speaker 1 29:08

Leo and I, as you know, love to go to listen to a good DJ, have a dance in Brooklyn, at, at, at Mirage, at avant-garde of Adam, at the knockdown center, at basement. We love to dance and the music has been bad lately. Music has been very bad and we've not gone. We've been here from our friends that you know were afterwards. This was horrible and the music and one of our favorite DJs recently addressed it, honey Dijon addressed that the DJs are playing the music way too fast. It's very cracky and it's an unununun enjoyable and we heard various things from people who went to parties and the Halloween parties. The Halloween parties, it was just horrible. When you're dancing you want to get a groove and it's like it's a sexy vibe and like hey, hi, not. And then there's that music at the end. We call it get out music like a 3, 30 or four o'clock when they want you to target, they start playing like it sounds like the alarm for your when those alarms before. We had a cell phone anyway at a Halloween party.

Speaker 4 30:22

Lennox, a someone that nightlife, a night out town, it girl is how she would describe her downtown.

Speaker 1 30:30

It girl a party promoter nightlife person. Nightlife person, yeah, gets dressed in these amazing costumes. Leo fell in love with her when she once went as a, as a as a dinosaur.

Speaker 4 30:48

Oh yeah, she wore dinosaur outfit to a club one time was amazing and Leo was just in love with her. Yeah, she wears like ridiculous things like, but like glam, like club kid fabulous like gold and mayor.

Speaker 1 31:00

No, I wouldn't say like gold and whatever is this fabulous and beautiful and she's fun and she's in whatever the and it's just nice to see her at the at the whatever party you're going to is always a cute look and and so she went this year as oh so so for Halloween she wore a fat suit With prosthetics and went as like a fat MTA worker.

Speaker 3 31:30

Isn't she going to get canceled, oh?

Speaker 4 31:31

yeah, so I was showing Modi. I was like look at the comments on here and everyone was very upset, which I guess is why you're talking about this, because, yeah, people are sensitive and we're. I don't think it's sensitive.

Speaker 1 31:42

Yes, I don't think it was judgy about about.

Speaker 3 31:46

that's what we were talking about one of my friends who told me that her kid was dressed as a homeless person for Halloween and I was like they're called unhoused. That's what I said. I was like. First of all, they're not called homeless people. They're called people who are currently experiencing a lack of housing.

Speaker 1 32:07

That's how you call them. Now You're kidding Exactly what you call it when you call home no, really there is.

Speaker 4 32:14

There is a push to refer to them as unhoused rather than homeless. Okay, it's part of the whole social like, politically correct, like.

Speaker 3 32:24

But they still step over them.

Speaker 4 32:27

Yeah, put the spikes down from their building so they don't sleep.

Speaker 3 32:31

They don't want them anywhere near them, but what you call them.

Speaker 4 32:34

So your friends kid went as a homeless person a little bit.

Speaker 1 32:38

What he did, what he do he do.

Speaker 3 32:42

I don't know, I didn't ask her, but I was just like, hmm, you're probably gonna get canceled for that and also, that's not what they're called. Oh my God, louis Sique has a great joke about that. What?

Speaker 3 32:54

he said you know this one that he went to like Port Authority wants to pick up like his ex-wife's cousin who came in from on a train from New Hampshire and had never been to New York before. And there was a homeless person, like in really bad shape, like sprawled out right at the entrance of Port Authority and this woman from New Hampshire, who had never been to New York City before, got right down in this homeless person's face and she was like oh my God, do you need help? And they grabbed the cousin and they said no, no, no, no, no, don't do that, don't do that. And the cousin said why do they not need help? And Louis goes oh, no, no, no, no, they desperately need your help.

Speaker 3 33:36

But, he's supposed to be there.

Speaker 1 33:38

Right, yeah, oh, okay, we wish them well. It's okay, it's not top of your wheel, I'm going to go into, because then also it brings you into mental health.

Speaker 3 33:49

Yeah.

Speaker 1 33:49

It's a whole. It's a whole, and Leo and I have been traveling all over America and the homeless situation everywhere is absolutely out of control. La, oh yeah what? Those homes and the tents, the tent city. I don't even know how to, I don't know what you can do, I don't know. It's so, it's so sad, but at least the weather is amazing over there. If you had to be a homeless person somewhere, do it in LA, unhoused, unhoused. If you feel an unhoused, if you're lacking housing, lack it in LA, because over there at night you're not going to be cold.

Speaker 3 34:24

No, but there is like cholera and like all of these, like awful.

Speaker 1 34:29

Yeah, it's not a good situation, oh God Okay.

Speaker 3 34:33

You said there was something else you wanted to do. You said there were two things that you wanted to talk about.

Speaker 1 34:36

Polonowskipi, what was the other thing?

Speaker 3 34:38

I don't know what was the other thing.

Speaker 4 34:41

I had. We've covered a lot of ground.

Speaker 1 34:43

We've covered a lot of ground. I don't know. We're just again everybody. We are not here to solve the world's problems. Modi, you don't have to keep telling them that they're listening. I love that because I love when they come to me on the streets or in events and say I just love to turn my brain off and listen to your podcast?

Speaker 4 34:57

Yeah, but by reminding them of that, you're turning their brain back on Okay, yeah, so stay with us.

Speaker 1 35:03

Yeah, here we are.

Speaker 3 35:04

But also, you know I don't really like the complaints.

Speaker 1 35:09

What complaints?

Speaker 3 35:09

And you should talk about this.

Speaker 1 35:11

No, no, no, we don't discuss them. I'm going to complain about the complaints.

Speaker 3 35:17

What else I want. I mean, this is going a little bit against what you're saying, but the people who are ripping down these posters have become a thing.

Hostage Situation and Anti-Semitism Awareness

Speaker 1 35:27

It's really sad, okay, so now we're back on something more the, the project of all the missing hostages. We did want to. I was honored and privileged to be a part of the of posting a hostage on my, on my platform, on my Instagram account, and I actually got the. His cousin reached out and said thank you and I was so, so, so touched. God. The guy is my guy, 73 years old, and he was on my you know, and you kept looking at me just like this poor guy, 73 years old, and he's, he's a hostage.

Speaker 3 36:16

So there are 239, I think, missing Israelis who are, and actually from 30 plus countries also, not just the Israelis who are being held by Hamas right now, and there's a huge movement to bring them home.

Speaker 1 36:35

So my guy, god, who is whose cousin, reached out to me Thank you very much for letting me know and just did that. If you look at the picture on my Instagram of God, he's standing in a kitchen and behind him is hanging pots and pans One of those kitchens where the there's the pots and pans, and if you look, it looks like there's ear, it's like earrings. Look, you see that I don't know. Yes, I just he's the smile. His smile is so sweet. You can tell he's a cute guy and probably has kids and whatever. And I it's just a sweet Israeli guy and just it's just funny how there's there's a pot and pans hanging on the side of his ears in the picture.

Speaker 3 37:18

Again, we try to find a little humor in something but it's not, it's not humorous, but but I think it's really important that people keep this in like the number one thing of what's going on right now is to bring these.

Speaker 1 37:36

And Hamas could really end some of the bombings that's happening there by releasing them, but they don't care. And I want to tell you something for my friends in Israel that I speak to. That's where I get my news, not from, from other stuff. I speak to people in Israel and they said that the families of the hostages have taken it upon themselves to do the PR and to do all these campaigns, and they said that they did it because they knew Israel would not be able to do a good job at Israel.

Speaker 1 38:04

Israel's, israel's PR is one of one of the worst.

Speaker 3 38:08

Yeah.

Speaker 4 38:09

And so we were talking that there's this. You know you did a social media campaign, but there's also. They're posturing the flyers all over different cities to raise a wave, All over different cities to raise awareness for the hostages, and what Periel was saying was that there's people tearing them down and yeah, there are people.

Speaker 3 38:27

I mean it's really sick that there are people tearing down these posters of people that are kidnapped.

Speaker 1 38:34

It's innocent pictures of babies that were kidnapped and they are and they're tearing them down, and it just shows you that you know again anti-Semitism. It just that's there. It's there and, and these hostages are just your heart and everybody keeps saying that you know like I have to go do this and this and that, and then you say, well, at least you're not a hostage. And it just reminds you immediately you could be in a much worse place. Yes, you could be in a much worse place.

Speaker 3 39:03

But I do feel like it. We, we have to everybody has to do their part, to raise their voices to help bring these people home. It's horrible.

Speaker 4 39:14

No, but don't, not to be like that guy. But don't you think a lot of them are dead? I don't know, we don't know, you don't know.

Speaker 3 39:22

They might not be.

Speaker 1 39:23

They might not be. They released one or two here and there and you have to have hope and you know it's so and it's literally the only. It's the only bargaining chip that they have over there in, and Israel has jails full of terrorists that blew and killed people up and they're probably willing to exchange. Here's your entire, here's hundreds of of of your terrorists. Just give us back our citizens.

Speaker 4 39:48

I just I was thinking when they released the first two hostages. They were both elderly women. I just can't imagine what it's like to like be at the end of your life and go through something like that and then survive it Like live out whatever remaining years you have left in this like post traumatic. I don't know, I just can't imagine. It's horrible to go through at any stage of your life but for some reason, like these elderly women, I'm like thank God they're home now. But where do you go from there?

Speaker 3 40:20

I went and these little kids go into into appreciation power.

Speaker 4 40:24

But you know, I don't know, I'm not them or know them, but you go into appreciation, you just survived, something you just think of like your golden years and like trying to enjoy, like you know, the later years of your life with your family and like that was robbed from them and it will never be like fully back.

Speaker 1 40:41

It's definitely a story to tell the table, yeah, and that when they're sitting there on a Passover, they have a story to share, you know?

Speaker 3 40:50

that's why people also keep saying like never again is now.

Speaker 1 40:54

Never again is now, but never again is. Is you? You kidnap us. You better be ready for some serious consequences. It's never again you get. You get a card blanche to just to just kill us. You're going to be suffering yourselves, but I it's such. I know we got deep into this, but it's so scary, so it's so. It's so amazing that Leo is in this world. He's not Jewish and he's in this world. He was on a flight that got out of Israel last minute with sirens and bombings and all kinds of, all kinds of, and now he's, you know, producing shows that need extra super security and all the shows that I have now have amazing amounts of security that's being organized either through Shomrim or the police departments of the area and and the the local authorities, and it's it's a new part of of comedy.

Speaker 3 41:55

I would like to put you in a bulletproof vest.

Speaker 1 41:59

No, you have fatting. That is that makes you look so fat. Oh my god, I'm not wearing a bulletproof vest.

Speaker 3 42:04

You're not Although.

Speaker 1 42:05

I spoke to Alex Edelman Uh-huh.

Speaker 3 42:07

And he's wearing a bulletproof vest. He's, he's he's.

Speaker 4 42:10

he's a but Alex Edelman friend of the show. You can go back and listen to his episode. Yes, alex Edelman, who also has a show called Just For Us, just For Us Amazing comedian. He has also one man show type thing called Just For Us.

Speaker 1 42:21

That's really good and Alex was telling me you know that he does a Q&A at the end of the show and someone asked him aren't you afraid of being killed or murdered? And he never really thought about that. But now he says when he's doing a show and he sees somebody walking in the audience, he's like, and he's, he's, he's doing a one man show, he's not doing stand-up comedy, he did stand-up comedy but it's a former one man show that's scripted at this point. And he's like, he goes, it throws me off, right, it throws me off. You see somebody walking down the, you know as a comic doing stand-up comedy. If I see somebody walking in the audience, I go sir, how, how was your pitch? You know how was it? You can just address the fact that he's walking or you're so subtle trying to get through this row. He can't, he can't break character and go into that.

Speaker 4 43:08

I will say as a non-jew yes, you know, in the beginning of a, I've we've been together what? Almost nine years at this point, kanaynahara. In the beginning, you know, when I would hear about antisemitism, it seemed like a very abstract, sort of antiquated concept, like, yeah, sure, I think it exists somewhere, but I've never seen it kind of thing. And now it's very, very apparent that it is very real and it's I, it's terrifying and it's I don't understand how people can deny like that some of the actions and some of the things that people are doing and saying at these protests is just antisemitism period. Right, some of it is thin, some of it is veiled under like political arguments Right, bullshit, but some of it is just outright. We don't like the Jews.

Speaker 1 43:59

No, but it's also hitting you directly when it's happening on a college campus. We're not on a college campus, but it's happening.

Speaker 4 44:06

I don't remember my college campus being as politically charged as what I'm seeing like in the videos that are circulating online now at college, because things have happened since you've been in college. I don't remember it being like that, like I don't even remember knowing where the kosher dining hall was in college, or like I, because you know that whole thing with Cornell happened where they had to like shut down the right, the kosher dorms, it's not a part of your world.

Speaker 1 44:31

Keep in mind, we're sitting here talking about the war in Israel. There's people who it's not a part of their world. Yeah.

Speaker 3 44:37

It's like this is happening to other people someplace else.

Speaker 1 44:41

Here's the news the guy shot everybody in Maine. There's a new speaker of the house or this thing with Israel, who cares? Turns it off to us. We're living it. And when you're in college, when you were in college, you weren't concerned about the hill L or the or the.

Speaker 4 44:54

I remember is the abortion people on campus Right All I remember they would like have those giant posters in the stand in the quad, but I never remember anyone talking about, you know, israel or Palestine, or any but, again, and even now, it's not a part of your world.

Speaker 1 45:09

Your world now is organizing security for a comedy show that you're producing. Yeah, it's a different. It's a different world, it's a different. That that's where your anti-Semitism clicks in. That's where that I'm not your. That's when anti-Semitism clicks in for you. Yeah, yeah, it's just.

Speaker 4 45:29

you know it's scary, can I just say. Even before I met you, though, I never understood anti-Semitism, because it just is like your bit. Like the Jewish people just want to be left alone. Like anyone who's ever annoyed me with religion was never Jewish, I'll just say that much. It's everyone who was either forcing it down your throat or wanting to do this, and that is never from Jewish people, right? So whenever I would hear about these anti-Semitic things, I was like why?

Speaker 1 45:58

Right, if you think about the guys on the street, the, the, the Chabad kids on the street that are asking you if you're Jewish to put on a fill in. They say are you Jewish? You say no, they leave you alone.

Speaker 3 46:07

Yeah.

Speaker 1 46:08

The ones that are Christian, catholic hey, is Jesus in your life. They like to accept Jesus as they want you to and they want to. They don't care what you are. They want you we're like you know. Go ahead, do enjoy your day.

Speaker 3 46:19

The only people that Jews annoy are other Jews.

Speaker 1 46:24

And now you have a title for your, for the podcast.

Speaker 4 46:30

Did I talk about when I told those guys the only Jews that only people Jews annoy is other.

Speaker 1 46:35

It's funny because Rabbi Posner, the Rabbi from the Chabad of Boston, says I'm going out there to to annoy the, to to annoy the Jewish kids. I'm going out there to make sure that they know they're Jewish and this is what they should be doing, and it's it's did I tell you on.

Speaker 4 46:50

I think I said this on the podcast already. But the other day I was walking down the street after the war had already this October 7th had already happened, and one of those Chabad guys asked if I was Jewish and I said yes, and but I didn't let him put, I just wanted. I don't know why I lied in that moment, why, but I just wanted him. I didn't want it to be a no and I didn't want to be like I'm married to a Jew or like I'm on your side, I'm an ally. So I just said yes and kept walking.

Speaker 3 47:18

I don't think that was the right response, but no, because then he was upset, that you and I know, but at the moment I didn't want to say no, because it's not no, I'm not not. You're not not at this point. Jewish adjacent.

Speaker 4 47:30

I will say that next time. Yeah, I'll say I'm Jewish adjacent and you don't have to put filling on me because I'm not Jewish and you should appreciate, you know what.

Speaker 1 47:38

Put it put up, if you, if anything. Back to the filling argument.

Speaker 4 47:41

We've already had a whole podcast episode about who should it be putting on filling?

Speaker 3 47:45

right, okay, yeah, but we had a rabbi here for it, if I'm not mistaken again, again.

Speaker 1 47:50

If somebody on the street asks you to put on filling and you're Jewish, do it. If it doesn't, if you don't believe in any of it, at least you have an opportunity to make somebody happy. The guy putting it to fill in on with you will be so happy. The energy of that is is the Shema, israel, the hero, israel, the Lord, god, the Lord is one and do it. You know what? Do it even if the conscious just to help uh, it is real.

Speaker 3 48:12

Put that on, even if you're not Jewish. They want to. No, no, no, no, no if you're Jewish.

Speaker 1 48:16

If you're not Jewish, you don't have to do it. Okay, it's not a part of your, of your journey, that's that's that, that's what it is. Um, anyway, this was light and heavy.

Speaker 4 48:25

This, this episode, no, yeah um good though, uh, modilifecom for all the shows this is going to be airing, most likely after we announce like 13 domestic tour dates, so go look and see if there's a show near you modilifecom.

Speaker 1 48:41

I'm going to be performing all over the place between boston, atlanta, cleveland, long island, um new jersey, new jersey, we're hitting new jersey. And um give me more. Uh, you forgot already. Orlando, orlando um Dallas, dallas.

Speaker 4 49:01

Houston, no, not Houston.

Speaker 1 49:03

Dallas, dallas, dallas um other than we did something in Houston.

Speaker 4 49:07

No, we did something in Houston, but it's a private show. It's not about but their tickets are very low for other people.

Promoting Comedy Shows and Merchandise

Speaker 1 49:11

I don't have that to go link. Okay, so, um, modilifecom for all the shows. Find the show near you. If you see a show near where one of your friends lives, let them know I'm going to be there and, of course, be the friend that buys the ticket. Be the friend that brings the friends to the comedy show. Get tickets, not just for yourself. Pick up a bunch. By the time the show comes, you'll have who to invite and you'll have those tickets. Um and uh, modilifecom. Anything with you, periel.

Speaker 3 49:38

Periel Ashenbrand on instagram. My whole information, life is there and and uh.

Speaker 1 49:46

The merch store is up and running. You can get a mashiich energy hat like this and just whenever someone says what's up, you just say mashiich energy and uh, discuss that. Make sure you're speaking about mashiich and also the yamaka, the mashiich energy yamaka. On the inside it says it all starts with me, me mashiich energy. Uh, thanks for listening, everybody, and uh, mashiich energy to you.