AND HERE’S MODI
AND HERE’S MODI is an inside look at the man behind the microphone. Hosted by comedian, Modi (@modi_live), AHM features a raw and unfiltered side of the comedian rarely seen on stage. He always finds the funny as he navigates the worlds of comedy, trending topics, his personal life and spirituality. AHM is co-hosted by Periel Aschenbrand (@perielaschenbrand) and Leo Veiga (@leo_veiga_).
AND HERE’S MODI
AHM & Unidentified Aerial Phenomena
Episode 121: The AH'M crew is joined by Rabbi Bellino of Sixth Street Synagogue to discuss everything from UFO's to his Christian Louboutin shoes.
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Welcome to. And here's Modi. I can't believe we are back. And here's Modi. Oh my God, we haven't been in the studio for a while. We are here with Gav, the holy rabbi of Sixth Street Synagogue, and my friend, and I think the order is the other way and Leo is here and Perry L is here in the cutest little outfit. If you guys get a chance to see it, she's got her little name. She's like a waitress that like I think in the 50s from.
Speaker 1:Happy Days when they roller skate when they roller skate to the car and put the tray on the car and they eat it.
Speaker 4:A soda jerk.
Speaker 1:I've been watching a lot of Mad Men. Okay, is that on Mad Men? No, it's more Happy Days, it's giving Happy Days. We have done so much since we've been last here and you guys are great. Comments have been coming in and they're so much fun. Can I just tell you, last night at the Comedy Cellar, I've been backar, I've been back, so I've been back and I've been, I've been, I put it for spots at the comedy cellar and last night, um, as he's giving me, me, those prime spots the middle of the show where they're all warmed up what juicy spots.
Speaker 1:The juicy spots like the yummy blah, yum yum yum spots like there's, like there's the MC. Then the first comic, second, and then me, and last night, was Matteo, lane and Regina and they were both power acts Like bah, screaming, yelling, getting Matteo flying up there. It was amazing. And the audience that's right around the stage was lit you know they're always lit because they have cameras on them. And there was a woman who and her husband right next to it, and she wasn't wearing a hijab, she was wearing the, just the cover of the hair, but really nice, like a texel almost. But for somebody who's Modernish, modernish, she was very modernish, okay, but still I, but still I was watching her the entire show while the other comics were on. Her and her husband were having the best time in the world.
Speaker 1:Of course there was this big over-the-top woman and then there was Matteo, who was as gay as a goose. He literally his opening line was I'm gay. That was his opening line, right, and I came on and I'm Jew and it was like the obvious. She laughed so hard during my set, this woman, and it just literally gives you hope and it lets you know that the peace is going to come through comedy.
Speaker 2:Anything she laughed too hard at.
Speaker 1:I did do the joke where I hit the wall looking for the Jews. They loved that.
Speaker 3:They could not have laughed harder. That's an old family heart warmer it's a go-to.
Speaker 1:It's a go-to. It's a joke I do sometimes where I just it's a quickie and it gets them all set up for what I'm doing. I'm doing a brand new joke and I talked about Leo being Catholic, or used to be Catholic, and they were loving it. They were just so happy and it was just. It gave you such hope. It gave you such hope.
Speaker 3:I don't know good, I'm glad you had a good set does that comedy comedy.
Speaker 1:Does that okay? Um, I wasn't there with you last night.
Speaker 3:You weren't there last night, it's okay, I think you've, I think lately you've been having better sets when I'm not there, so it's better for me to watch the footage back later and see if there's any nuggets in there. Then, if I'm in the room with you while you're doing it, I think usually it's better.
Speaker 1:That's his way of saying I don't want to go to the comedy cellar anymore.
Speaker 3:It's a 1050 spot. I I'm gonna be moisturized in bed.
Speaker 1:So I put in for spots and then you wait to see what SD gives you and, like Monday, she gave me two spots. I'm like what Am I, matteo Lane? Two spots in one day, and I forgot it's when Norm has the band there. Oh, the music night. Wow, is that loud? There's trombones and sax. The room is the size of this. You know, it's a small little restaurant and there is like a guy with a trombone, a tuba, trumpets, it's. It's a music man. It's literally your ears are bleeding, but it was so. Everybody there was having a blast and that's just what I love to see. So, since we've been here, I think Leo's going to be a little bit in shock of what topic I'm bringing up is. First, we've been to fire island. We had our week in fire island. It was absolutely amazing. We were there with dr k, who was previous guests.
Speaker 1:A few episodes, a few episodes ago and he was with us and we had this amazing house on the beach and thank god the beach is still there and there's one night saturday night we went out. We went out dancing and doing your fire island thing and we got back to the house at 3 30 am and we went upstairs. There's a, the hot tub is on the roof of the house and we saw ufos oh, I'm going.
Speaker 3:Everyone, calm everyone. Look at me, everyone, look at me. We saw a ufo. Okay, all three of us saw it. It went on for like 25 minutes. It was. At first it was that, it was is that star moving? And then we're like, yeah, it's moving. And then it was like it's an airplane. And then we saw airplanes. And this was not an airplane Different color, different shape, not blinking lights. It would move, like so it would be here one second and then it would be over here, and then it would be over here. It would be over here.
Speaker 1:So now, just to set this up, we are five men in a hot tub, I mean. At four in the morning, at four in the morning staring at the sky and seeing a UFO. Leo is locked like this. There it is, it just moved, it just stopped.
Speaker 3:It can't, I stand by. We saw a UFO.
Speaker 1:Now, of course, what do you do? Do you call Now, on the island there's a little.
Speaker 2:You call Hatzala no.
Speaker 1:You call Hatzala. On the island there's like a little police station with two policemen that are always there and they're from the Sable Police. They bring them over on the how do you call and say, hi, we are seeing a UFO. And, yes, we're on blank, blank ocean walk. We're on the hot tub upstairs. We just came back from the pavilion which is the duke downs club. We're all on mushrooms I wasn't on any.
Speaker 3:I was not on mushrooms, we, that was a ufo, you saw it.
Speaker 1:We saw it a hundred percent, but we we were like it was.
Speaker 2:It was a ufo?
Speaker 1:I'm not.
Speaker 2:I'm not so mad at you I didn't stop it. I needed another thing to be anxious and upset about. My heart is racing.
Speaker 3:Let me tell you something. When it was happening, I was screaming. First of all, please take me, Please stop and take me.
Speaker 1:I want to go up there. I want to see what's going on Probe away.
Speaker 3:But I was like, finally, this happens to me. I've been reading about UFOs you know I'm obsessed with ufos I've read, I've seen every documentary. I've read the the senate hearings. I am primed for this and I am telling you you were trying to convince me. It's a drone.
Speaker 2:You're like, oh, someone has a drone because that makes us feel I was like that's not a drone we can get back to the hot tub I'm dying, no, and then I looked it up and it says long island is a hotspot for UFO activity.
Speaker 1:This is by the way, right where flight TWA 800 went down. Oh God, okay, no, no, not that I've been there, okay, wait. At one point, but the funniest line of it all was I'm like Leo, okay, so there's a UFO and Leo goes. No, you don't you understand. This could be my whole new persona.
Speaker 3:Ufo. I'm gonna make this my whole new personality. Oh, energy, but again it brings you.
Speaker 1:It brings you back to every time you see a UFO documentary. They have these people. Who are they? We saw it. Here's the documentary, here's the video.
Speaker 3:And then there's always one thing that's like a little off, a little off, a little off.
Speaker 1:So the guy's like here I am, I'm this and that. Here's the video. I was here, I was there and me and my 94 cats that I live with saw them and as soon as you go, he's got 94 cats okay all right, we literally just came back from raving we saw the helicopters.
Speaker 3:We saw the airplanes. These were neither of those things. Listen to me. We saw the way it was moving in the sky was so bizarre, like I've never seen anything like that move, the way that it did Listen to me and then all of a sudden just goes like this Leaves Gone. It was hovering, moving around, zigzagging around and low it wasn't high, it was low.
Speaker 4:You guys are bugging out.
Speaker 3:I'm bugging out, I'm freaking out. You're calm, andrew's calm, no no, no. I mean you're bugging. Andrew was like guys.
Speaker 4:Andrew was in the shock, where he was like silent. He was like right, if you had witnessed a murder under those situation, like under that situation at four o'clock in the morning after a night of ingesting, god knows what it would be no one injected anything.
Speaker 1:That's what you're worried about. I don't need, there's a whole other mudraiga.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I mean what? What does the murder have to do?
Speaker 2:with this. I'm just saying like I'm not sure which you're worried about. I don't need that's a whole other mudraiga. Yeah.
Speaker 3:It's a different injection. I mean what? What does the murder have to do with this?
Speaker 4:I'm just saying like I'm not sure how credible the source is, like it might be the 94 cats.
Speaker 3:A hundred percent. That's why I Hold on. Let me the next morning.
Speaker 1:So now two guys that were staying at the house with us. They were sleeping and so upset that we didn't wake them up.
Speaker 2:You didn't have video, you didn't have your phones. Actually, Andrew has a picture as a video on his phone.
Speaker 1:Right, that's like very hard to see, but the next day the next day in the pool, completely chill, coffee, avocado, toast and eggs, and everything was all broad daylight, broad daylight. We are back at the pool and I'm looking up and I go, oh, there's a white thing going back and forth and peter saw it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so there was something flying around up there and then, and there was apparently a meteor that broke up over manhattan last week that, like nasa, announced they're like, by the way, a meteor entered the atmosphere, everyone carry on. It was like just like a little blip in the news cycle and, like they said, it exploded over Manhattan and like disintegrated. But I was like a meteor. Is that what it's?
Speaker 1:called, but Leo wouldn't go down. Leo stayed up there like this with his finger pointing here and there. I'm like I love you, but I am on the. I went back up to Okay, but we decided that can't be. But to my credit.
Speaker 3:I haven't made it my persona until right now, when you brought it up.
Speaker 1:I can't not bring that up. That was a situation we were in.
Speaker 3:I don't care who thinks I'm crazy.
Speaker 1:Nobody thinks you're crazy and you didn't see it alone. All of us saw it.
Speaker 4:Well, you saw something.
Speaker 1:Perrielle, it was an alien it wasn't, and you didn't see it alone, all of a sort. Well, you saw something, periel, it was an alien, it was an alien, it was. Whatever it was.
Speaker 3:Oh, it was not a man-made object. There's no way anything could move like that. And the way it was just hovering and zigzagging, and then the way it just like shot off, off like, and disappeared.
Speaker 4:Did it wave at you and say hi.
Speaker 3:No, but it turned blue when it shot away.
Speaker 4:You don't think you were just picking your?
Speaker 3:face up?
Speaker 2:No, I was not. I love his new persona.
Speaker 3:So hold on. You know, before this I was obsessed with UFOs. Yeah, I know that too.
Speaker 1:I'm with you. I love a documentary. I'm with you. That could be Mashiach energy. That could be what's going to save us.
Speaker 4:Okay, I'm with that.
Speaker 1:We have gone completely off the deep end, but hold on In my mind, okay. So Fire Island just for those of you who don't know and haven't been listening, fire Island is a barrier reef that's off of Long Island and it has different areas, one different areas. One of them is straight families, one of them is lesbians, one of them is gay men, one of them is billionaires and one of them so we're in the gay one, and there's a lot of guys there who bought houses and rent them out for an insane amount of money per week, which is what we did two weeks and you split up with your friends or not, but the guy who owns our house is staying at the house a few doors down. In my mind. He's just got a drone going to make sure that we're not destroying his $3.5 million house A drone.
Speaker 3:At 4 in the morning he's going to fly a drone over the house.
Speaker 1:If I had a $3.5 million house with 6 gays staying in it. There would be a drone right over the house.
Speaker 3:I've operated a drone. I've operated a drone, I've flown a drone. I know what they look like, I know what they sound like, I know what they move like. This was first of all so high up in the air.
Speaker 4:There was no way it was a drone. Do you think that these were gay aliens?
Speaker 3:I hope so. I kept saying with Gay aliens. I kept putting my the energy out. There was like, please come, get me, please come offended me why you want to leave me. I don't want to leave you. I want them to drop me back off, but it'd be a good Uber ride.
Speaker 1:I want to see what's going on up there? He's like, take me, take me. I'm like is the life with me so horrible?
Speaker 3:I didn't say that, I just want to see what that is.
Speaker 1:What's happening in there. I'll tell you what it looks. You get to a house and there's like a camera we sound crazy, we have to talk about something else like a camera like sure like a close circuit camera to see and it has, like, the lights all the way around it yeah, of course but like that's like infrared but nice but not the red ones, like a nice warm brownish lighting.
Speaker 3:It was really nice.
Speaker 1:The aliens had really good lighting, so it was good, but it changed blue when it flew away. Okay, Another funny thing that happened since our last podcast. I'm like still rattled.
Speaker 3:Well, I'm going to rattle you even more.
Speaker 1:I'm going to rattle you even more. We did a show in Jerusalem. Here we are back in Eretz HaKadosh, israel, after the war began and we left on the war and we're in the Jerusalem theater, which is stunning, and we're doing a show with Live Nation and their representatives there. And tread carefully, I'm treading very carefully, but I have my walk-on song. I sing Hatikvah afterwards and there's a walk-off song. That's it. There's no, there's no. I don't need queues of pictures on a monitor. And they couldn't get it. And they just couldn't get it. And then at one point, of course leo's running this thing. He's, he's the producer of the show and the guy that speaks is speaking. There has that whole in between every word, he has a, and so he. At one point we said I want this song to play at this and he was like they couldn't download, download it. And he said to Leo, there's no internet in there. Leo screamed at the guy this is Israel, you invented internet.
Speaker 3:Startup nation. Don't give me that. I was so. Don't give me that.
Speaker 1:But my parents were there. It was great. We were in Israel. My parents got to see him perform.
Speaker 2:That's so nice. You had a wedding.
Speaker 1:We were there for a wedding too, but we pulled the show together, 900 people in Jerusalem, and it was amazing.
Speaker 4:It was amazing it was amazing and here we are. No cue, I'm cuing you. You wanted to talk about. No, I don't know.
Speaker 1:I know I just that was just my burst of just that's amazing what else happened in Israel?
Speaker 2:no UFOs. I'll tell you that no, ufos no what happened? The aliens don't like.
Speaker 1:Israel's, israel's vibing. It's's weird it's Tel Aviv. You can't get a reservation in any restaurant. But when you do get the reservation and you're sitting with all of your friends, you're talking about the war, and that's the buzzkill, and that's the situation in Israel.
Speaker 3:Speaking of reservations, I got us a very hot ticket reservation. I got us a table at Polo Bar for this weekend. Amazing yeah, and we're going there with a it's very hard to do.
Speaker 1:I know the hoops I had to jump through. What hoops? Oh, there are hoops, honey. No, Michael Hoffman took him to some event A restaurant opening. And.
Speaker 3:I was talking to the PR girlies. You know I love a girl with a clipboard any girl with a clipboard running a guest list with an earpiece.
Speaker 3:I like gravitate towards them and I was like what's up, what's going on, what are we doing? And they're like we do hospitality, like food and beverage pr for like chefs and restaurants and I was like who tell me who? And they were like listing them off and they were like polo bar. I was like that one, I want to go to polo bar. She's like okay, like send me an email and I'll like reach out. You cannot get a reservation at polo bar you cannot.
Speaker 3:You, if you, you have to call a month in advance. So, like today is the 23rd, 24th, so if you wanted to go next month on the 25th, you have to call tomorrow in the morning and try to book it.
Speaker 1:And we're going with Cody.
Speaker 3:We're going with Cody, we're going with some guests of the podcast.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 3:Anyway.
Speaker 2:What's so great about?
Speaker 1:it I don't know, it's just supposed to be good people watching.
Speaker 2:It's just hard to get in.
Speaker 4:It's hard to get in. That's it.
Speaker 3:That's all he and it's Goyish, it's a Goyish polar bar, that sounds nice Nice.
Speaker 1:I've been, Because Goyish restaurants are not like a kosher restaurant. When you're in a kosher restaurant, first of all everybody walks in, they just stare oh, that's going to happen here too. Look at you and your face. Like this, no, no, but they're like this, no, in a Goyish restaurant, they're just like that In Jews, they go. They look into your face just to see how they know you. It's like walking into a deportation camp. Who do you know that survived?
Speaker 3:Not the deportation camp Anyway.
Speaker 1:Gav, how are you? You had a comedy night at the shul. I had no idea until I see the next day you posted.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's in the announcements. We talk about it, we talk it up.
Speaker 1:I had told you I never read the announcements.
Speaker 2:It's so, hani, lisbon produces it. Okay, and she has some of the Jew comedians.
Speaker 1:So it's nice, but you did it in the shul.
Speaker 2:They did it upstairs, they did it in the shul.
Speaker 1:They got about 120 people, so they got about 120 people, so you just sat up front, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly. Good for you On one side, like on the women's side. So everybody filled the left side. It was good. She brings in the spotlight. They brought in a sound guy.
Speaker 1:Amazing, that's cute. If I would have known I would have been right there.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:I had no idea. You know that I don't know anything.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you didn't text me.
Speaker 3:I'm sorry you didn't tell me oh.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry.
Speaker 3:I don't get the Sixth Street announcements.
Speaker 1:There's a whole underground of Jewish comedians. Now, when I say Jewish comedians, as we've discussed before, it's comics who are Jewish comedians, not comedians who happen to be Jewish Correct, and there's a whole.
Speaker 2:I mean, you sort of created them all, did I yeah?
Speaker 1:But they're very and they have these little venues that they do and it's very funny and they're Jewish.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and they're Jewish.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and they're working it out and they're working their material out and they're having fun with the audience, knowing that the audience knows what they know. And it's a vibe, it's a little niche.
Speaker 2:It's a little niche, it gets a little but that's where you start.
Speaker 4:That's where you start. That sounds great. Listen to me. Yeah, talk to me. Wow, I saw a picture of you on Instagram wearing the most fabulous pair of shoes.
Speaker 2:Oh, thank you. Yeah, I had a wedding. I have some fancy shoes.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, you have some good shoe game.
Speaker 4:We need to talk about the shoes, specifically those shoes. And then also, how are you gallivanting around in Christian Louboutin? Is that what they were? Yeah, it's not gallivanting. I did a wedding, I did a wedding. You're wearing a Galavanting around in like Christian Louboutin. Is that what they?
Speaker 2:were yeah, it's not galavanting. I did a wedding. I did a wedding. You're wearing a tuxedo. You do a wedding. Tuxedo is fair. Everyone's supposed to look the same.
Speaker 1:So if you want to look a little different, so you dress up the shoes.
Speaker 2:I think that's the move.
Speaker 4:Can we talk a little bit about?
Speaker 2:Also, I'll tell you I did the wedding. I'm the rabbi of the wedding, I facilitated it and in my mind, the rabbi who does the wedding gets up, sucks the air out of the room. Immediately Correct no one's listening. Doesn't look like the people getting married. Doesn't look like the same crowd. I don't want to be that guy anymore.
Speaker 1:You were never that guy I might have once, I don't know. Maybe. Yeah, were you for me annoying? I was for a bigger beard or whatever.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not that. It's that maybe I felt the role, maybe it was more of a part of my personality. So how did you?
Speaker 4:do. Did you have jokes?
Speaker 2:So yeah, personality, um so how did you do so? Jokes, so yeah. So you know, I do this thing. I I go back and forth between joking and explaining and roasting, and then that's an opportunity to get everyone's attention. I mean, you know, you start with a joke and then everyone wants to hear what you, that, what the next thing is going to be, and that's when you can.
Speaker 1:You can actually what was your joke was opening joke um, I don't remember.
Speaker 2:I often like to start, you know, like, you know how rabbis always get up and they say that, like that, there are two parts of the wedding kiddushin and the sewer. Like everyone has like that line right. So I, I didn't do it. I didn't do it at this one, but, like when it's a more modern crowd and they need to know that I'm normal, they need to know that I'm one of them so that they listen to me. So I get up and I'll say, uh, the jewish wedding is in, is pretty involved. Um, much like dick wolf's criminal justice system. It's composed of two separate yet equally important parts and like that gets a huge laugh. It's television, it gets a huge laugh. And like this, like it, like it's this relief. Actually it's comic relief. That's it's comic relief. That's what it is, because, okay, he's one of us.
Speaker 2:What's the next thing going to be? Right and he'll move it along and I give my couples about 12 or 13 questions to answer about themselves, about each other, that they do separately. So then I can weave that into a speech where I'm actually speaking about them as if I know them much closer than I would have naturally.
Speaker 4:So I ask us some of those questions here today.
Speaker 2:Oh, sure I love talking about a first date and hearing everyone's perspective of the first date.
Speaker 1:I hope they say grinder. I hope they say grinder, you know so.
Speaker 2:I mean, there's a lot of hinge. There's a lot of hinge. I wanted to make a joke. I didn't want to upset anybody, but I wanted to say Hinge, it's the app designed to be deleted, just like your browser history. But I took it down. I wasn't going to ruin anybody's day.
Speaker 3:I feel like I've heard a lot of couples who have met on hinge there's a lot of hinge, there's uh, there's j date, there's um.
Speaker 2:It's fun. So one time I got them to actually go into the account and find their first conversation the first texting and then I'll like read it and enhance it and like tease them about it.
Speaker 3:always you can tease the guy, always tease the guy about whatever horrible, which is the app where the girl has to make the move first.
Speaker 2:Bumble. I think it's Bumble yeah.
Speaker 1:What would your opening line be? I won't be as annoying as I look.
Speaker 2:I won't be as annoying as my pictures look I.
Speaker 3:So we just connected on Bumble. And now I can't message you until you message me first.
Speaker 4:So what's your opening line? What picture are you using? Just that, okay, that.
Speaker 3:It's me in this lifeguard.
Speaker 4:Speedo In this Speedo.
Speaker 3:The lifeguard Speedo. Yeah 0% body fat. That's my opening line. Unattainable levels of body fat I'll feed you, I'll feed you, I'll feed you.
Speaker 1:Is that good stuff? What was your opening line?
Speaker 4:I don't know, I think that maybe I'd have to start watching Baywatch.
Speaker 3:Okay, a Baywatch line, you know what mine would be for you.
Speaker 2:No, do you believe in aliens?
Speaker 3:Yes, oh then there'd be automatic date, automatic first, be automatic for date, automatic first date. Yes, I think that's one of the questions or that you can put, because, like one of them on hinge or whatever you can like, pick standardized questions to answer as part of your profile, like what are you reading, or this, or that I will tell you.
Speaker 1:Do you have sex on the first date? I'm not sure about this, but okay, that might be. What are the other questions um?
Speaker 4:what that's the first question what are each other's quirks?
Speaker 2:that's the first question. What are each other's quirks, so you have sex on the first?
Speaker 1:date you have to google quirk what that means.
Speaker 2:I know what it means you're funny. What's annoying about him? Let's talk about it. What's annoying about Modi? What bugs you? What's annoying about Modi?
Speaker 3:I'm starting a fight you can't the only thing that I I don't get annoyed with, but I'm just like not completely um on board with, is like when, for example, we tried to do the promo videos just now for your upcoming shows.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you pretend to just not know what they are I don't know the date and I'm like if you just looked at it you would remember so me doing aoma video holding the camera, like, hey, I'm here on the 12th and here on the 15th and I'm here. It's not cute, but when you you are the producer of the show, you are the one.
Speaker 2:No no no, no.
Speaker 1:So, by the way, there's a new thing we're doing which I remember my mother, my mother and my father, my mother, my mother and my. When we were growing up, we were like the only kids in the five towns that my mom brought us to shows, not just Broadway shows. If some singer was at the Beacon, if some singer was at Town Hall some is Rami Kleinstein.
Speaker 1:Rami, whatever my mother brought us to see it and I always remember the producer of the show walked on stage first, and if it was an israeli performer or whatever. But thank you all for coming. Uh, uh, I'm so happy we saw the show out. I have another show coming up with this other singer, the producer. Producer came out and welcomed the show, which is what Leo's going to be doing from now on. You produce the show, you have them sitting in their seats. You are going to be the one welcoming them.
Speaker 4:I love it 100%. I love it.
Speaker 1:So when we're doing a promo, so when we're doing a promo, and you know that I'm dyslexic and I don't have the dates. I don't have that in my head.
Speaker 2:I don't know. We write your pro.
Speaker 1:Just to the promos without me.
Speaker 3:The intro. The intro for the show.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, no, we kind of have a little bit of it. No, no, no, we need your help. Help, sure, I need help. We need your help, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:But he's beginning and this is happening at West Hampton, you're going to dress him up like a kangaroo.
Speaker 4:No, no, no, no, no. This is happening at the West Hampton.
Speaker 1:West Hampton, oh by.
Speaker 4:Schneier.
Speaker 1:Yeah, West Hampton.
Speaker 2:The theater. The theater, yes, that's nice. There, yes, oh, that's nice.
Speaker 1:Nothing to do with any synagogue, nothing to do with any religious organization. There's a theater that I'm performing for, for whoever, is coming and they might not all be Jewish Wow.
Speaker 2:That's on this Sunday. West Hampton, not all Jewish. Yes, got it.
Speaker 3:As your mother calls it the Jewish ghetto in West Hampton. It literally is it's amazing.
Speaker 1:I was there a few weeks ago. You were there, you had some event.
Speaker 2:It's a lot, you know, you gotta give him a lot.
Speaker 3:Isn't that where the wedding was, you gotta give him a lot of credit.
Speaker 2:He's running a shul in a vacation community. Who, rabbi Schneier? He's running a shul in a vacation community. That means his competition is the beach and the beach is losing that. He fills his shul and he keeps them there for hours. It's endless, endless, endless, endless, endless. And everybody's there and everybody stays.
Speaker 1:It's unbelievable. I've been there Arthur Luxemburg took me there and it is a choose your own journey. Shul, you can be inside inside the synagogue. There's one wall that doesn't exist, so there's a whole outside area. There's a chazen that they have, Hirshtik, who is the loveliest, the loveliest. The voice is insane. He's amazing, and if you're on that wave, go inside, sit there. You listen to him, listen to the Torah reading. You connect, you have your Shabbos experience. If that is not your vibe, there is an entire whole section outside.
Speaker 2:It's the John Wilkes Booth section.
Speaker 1:Why do you call it that?
Speaker 2:That's where the character assassinations happen. Oh, we can't joke about that. The character assassinations.
Speaker 1:No, I don't know what they're talking about, but everybody there, everybody, everybody doesn't want to be sitting and listening to a chazen is out there, but they're still in shul. It's a community. You have a synagogue, that there's people who go right to the lunch. No one goes upstairs. So that's okay and we love it. And we love it. So it's a it's choose your own do you know whatisions?
Speaker 1:we love A&H Provisions, the hot dogs which, by the way, I had on July 4th and Seth. Thank you again for being a part of our podcast. A&h Provision kosherdogsnet.
Speaker 3:Your first order 30% off when you use promo code MODY M-O-D-Y and they don't just have hot dogs, they have pastrami and other things. How?
Speaker 2:about some vegan hot dogs.
Speaker 3:Seth.
Speaker 1:Leave him alone. No, leave Seth alone. We're just doing a nice promo. Leave him alone, can we?
Speaker 2:have A and H and V. Why Are you a vegan? No?
Speaker 1:I'm a vegetarian.
Speaker 4:He's not not vegan I don't eat animals, okay.
Speaker 1:I'm not Okay, listen to me. I've gone full circle on the eating animals thing. Yeah, we've gone full circle. I've gone full circle. We've actually had. We were with Jake Cohen up in Hudson at his beautiful home and he made this meat that was so kosher, so delicious. I don't eat meat often, but when it's like done and there it's A&H, it's A&H, or whatever it is. I don't always eat meat, but when it's like done and there it's A&H, it's A&H or whatever it is.
Speaker 1:I don't always eat meat, but when I do, no no, but like when I get to Dina's house and she's performing Choosing, mom's choosing, you know, then you eat it. That's a lot, it's so good.
Speaker 2:You were there, oh my God.
Speaker 4:Okay, there's so much food Refocusing, refocusing Please.
Speaker 1:God help us. Thank you, thank God, you're here.
Speaker 4:Your questions at the wedding Questions Okay, I want to say one thing, which is that these two were the only couple on earth that I know that you could ask what annoys you about each other, and they're literally like.
Speaker 3:No, I'm sure he has answers. But he loves me too much, that's not true. I don't have To. He loves me too much, that's not true.
Speaker 1:I don't have to like say them on camera no, no, no, nothing, nothing, everything you do, I find adorable.
Speaker 4:You know that If you asked my husband oh we'd be.
Speaker 1:we'd need four hours of podcast. We'd be here for no, he comes in the morning. He doesn't want this. He talks too much.
Speaker 4:You could stop with. He comes in the morning.
Speaker 3:Wait, what does?
Speaker 1:that mean she wakes up in the morning and he's already annoyed. She woke up.
Speaker 4:What are the other questions?
Speaker 2:I want to hear about how they are with each other's families.
Speaker 4:That's also.
Speaker 2:that's a really important point of information. If it's rough on one side or the other, then you can't talk about it as if it's not. You just sort of sidestep it and avoid that and maybe not talk about how they integrate into each other's families at all.
Speaker 4:Maybe leave all that out. You mean at the wedding, as the rabbi At the wedding, correct?
Speaker 2:So it's all for making a speech and you know most of these rabbis. They get up, they don't put any work into it. No, they give a d'var Torah that lasts forever.
Speaker 1:Horrible.
Speaker 2:That has nothing to do with anything.
Speaker 1:And no one remembers.
Speaker 2:Or they're giving marital advice. Well, if you listen to more and who wants to listen, who wants to hear that?
Speaker 1:So, when, I perform a wedding which I just officiated, a wedding for family. Literally. Now I just do family and friends, and the wedding I did in israel was family and friends and it was in israel. So the rabbanut, the, the rabbinical which is controlling everything there, you have to go through them. It's not just an officiant of the state.
Speaker 1:So he was a very sweet guy, he's the chief rab Yafo, which is where the mother of the daughter comes from, and he wanted to do the first two. But he was like, and I asked him please just dress like a little knight. And he wore his kaput his robe. I wore mine, I wore the yearly kaput. How good did I look? You looked good. No, first of all, it adds like four inches. When you're slim too, it looked amazing. I killed it.
Speaker 1:But my main focus is the blessings, the seven blessings that bring you to the next, bring you from the lower worlds to the upper worlds. You know that's where you put the energy in, you know. So whoever's giving those blessings you're taking there? So I had one of the grandfathers who was married to his wife and I bring him up and I said and you're married to your wife. How long he looked at me? I may well ask him what's the cure? What are the winning lottery numbers? He had no idea. So I go to the audience. How long have you been married to the wife? She was 64 years. Now the father of the bride, he's in his third marriage. So I said to the couple I said you are being blessed now by a man who's been married for 64 years. And then I turn to the father and I go to the same woman.
Speaker 2:Nice, oh my.
Speaker 3:God, it's so nice, that's risky. It was risky, but no.
Speaker 1:But by then I had already established that we are here with a purpose Connect the souls, Bring them into the upper worlds. We are friends, we are you know, and we gave that rabbi. I let him do the first, I didn't let him. He wanted to. I'm like all yours. I got it and that was it. And we moved on.
Speaker 4:I don't understand.
Speaker 3:You're a rabbi, I'm clergy, he's ordained, he can marry people.
Speaker 4:You can yes. Is that new? I have a license.
Speaker 3:No you can go do it too. You can go get a license and do whatever.
Speaker 1:I'm good. No, you couldn't, she couldn't.
Speaker 3:She could? Yes, she could.
Speaker 4:Anyone can Cookie's like no, she couldn't.
Speaker 3:Yeah, she's like. No, not this one.
Speaker 2:She could get ordained by the UFO of the Alliance.
Speaker 3:That's me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3:He's going to perform with wings for aliens, if anyone listening to this, is on my team and believes that I did see a UFO. Please send me a DM. We're all on your team. We're all on your team.
Speaker 1:But what are we going to do about it? There's nothing we can do about it Maybe they'll come back.
Speaker 4:Okay. What do you want to go to?
Speaker 3:I want to see what's in their medicine cabinet, I'm like what are these motherfuckers taking?
Speaker 4:You want to go into the UFO.
Speaker 3:I want to go inside of there.
Speaker 4:But you don't want to leave Earth.
Speaker 3:If they want to take me for a little spin, I'll go Really.
Speaker 4:You wouldn't.
Speaker 3:Woody does not like that at all. I don't think so, assuming I don't get into an Uber with four stars. This is assuming they're nice, they're not going to kill me, they're going to bring me back, right?
Speaker 4:No, you have no guarantees of any of this. That's insane.
Speaker 3:Oh, so they could bring me on board and then just kill me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they could do whatever they want. They might be homophobic.
Speaker 1:No, they're definitely gay, you think aliens are gay.
Speaker 3:No, they're probably genderless. They probably procreate.
Speaker 4:It's a lot of assumptions. First of all, the aliens on Fire Island are definitely gay.
Speaker 3:Just because they vacation there doesn't mean anything. They could have been lost.
Speaker 4:This is the situation the alien, the thing lands, what's it called the UFO lands.
Speaker 2:The flying saucer.
Speaker 4:Leo, we've understood. It has come to our attention. There's an alien who comes out with a clipboard and an earpiece it has come to our attention that you have a great interest it's like take me for a spin, but I need to be back for Polo Bar.
Speaker 3:Yeah, You're like. I have a reservation at Polo Bar at 730. Are you getting on?
Speaker 4:You have no guarantee of anything. I mean of course you have no guarantee.
Speaker 1:I would probably. I don't have one password for any of the accounts we have. Are you insane? Are you insane. All of the shows coming up, all of the shows coming up at the Beacon in Denver in. Australia, in all of those places, they would just have to end because there's no passwords for anything. Oh my God.
Speaker 3:Anyway, should we like wrap this up a little bit and then do a shorter episode on like what's happening politically?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, let's do that, you guys. Thank you for listening. Oh, my God, god, when I meet my audience and they tell me that they love listening to me while they're walking their dog and it's mind-numbing and they don't have to think.
Speaker 2:I don't know, that's not really a compliment.
Speaker 4:That's not a compliment, it's a compliment.
Speaker 2:Oh, you're mind-numbing, it's a compliment.
Speaker 3:I love listening to you. It makes me feel like my brain doesn't work.
Speaker 1:It's literally. It's like 45 minutes to an hour, hour 10 of just not having to really think or need to fight with somebody about something, and that's it. It's a comedian, his husband, his rabbi and Periel, his waitress, his waitress.
Speaker 4:I have to tell you guys something before we wrap up the show, that you'd be very proud of me.
Speaker 3:No.
Speaker 4:I have been coaching one of my closest friend's daughters on her bat mitzvah haftorah.
Speaker 1:How do you know how to do a bat mitzvah haftorah?
Speaker 2:I don't but she's at sleep Clergy. Oh no, clergy, exactly.
Speaker 4:She's at sleep away camp.
Speaker 2:This is going to be the most vulgar Haftorah.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 4:And I'm doing. She got like permission To do zooms with me, so I'm helping Her read it.
Speaker 1:She has oh, just, but not sing it.
Speaker 4:No, I don't know no, but she has to be Able to read it before she sings it.
Speaker 1:You know, it's like. It's like. It says that and she's like, you tell her to go into the house, you don't tell her not to go into the. It's her house too, not just Abraham's house. She should be able to go in. You know, that's how, that's what. Oh my God.
Speaker 2:Do you need help? What? What?
Speaker 4:are you offering?
Speaker 2:This sounds like you've taken on a lot.
Speaker 4:I just need to be able to read it. What do you mean? I thought I was doing a mitzvah.
Speaker 1:It's a mitzvah. Good for you. Do you know what else is a?
Speaker 3:mitzvah. Getting tickets to the comedy show with your friends? Go to wwwmodilivecom. There's tickets in Australia, zurich, london, denver, st Paul, minnesota, wow, new York. We're adding a show at the Beacon Theater. That's like a huge milestone event. We're doing two nights at the Beacon Theater. Do you know who else does that? Jerry Seinfeld and Sarah Silverman, and now Modi. That's right. You don't want to miss it. I'm working on adding shows in LA, South Florida, Las Vegas for early 25.
Speaker 1:Zurich again. We're doing the Palladium again.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we're coming back to the Palladium in February because the veils with the venue and our schedule didn't line up, so we're flying back to London to do another show for everyone who didn't get tickets for the first show, and you can stay up to date by signing up for the mailing list. Yes, my mother.
Speaker 1:so there's some I don't know online. So we're announcing this Friday that the show, the second show on the Beacon, is coming out, and I had no idea that there's some online chat.
Speaker 3:On Instagram there's a broadcast channel. It's like a text thread where I could like text everyone. So there's a broadcast channel.
Speaker 1:It's like a text thread where I could text everyone. So there's some. I don't know. My mom is on it. So my mom calls me to tell. So in my head, friday we're announcing this is going to be a big deal. My mother calls me You're adding another show to the beacon. How?
Speaker 3:did you find out? I've started leaking information into the broadcast channel once I know it's confirmed, because then it creates a little bit of a buzz.
Speaker 1:Thank you, a&h, very much for being our partnership, and thank you, weitz and Luxembourg Arthur, luxembourg, randy tell them how great the episode was and you guys are the best for helping us make this podcast happen. Thank you for listening, modilivecom. Let us know what you need or need to know about, and we will be back with another episode in a week.