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AND HERE’S MODI is an inside look at the man behind the microphone. Hosted by comedian, Modi (@modi_live), AHM features a raw and unfiltered side of the comedian rarely seen on stage. He always finds the funny as he navigates the worlds of comedy, trending topics, his personal life and spirituality. AHM is co-hosted by Periel Aschenbrand (@perielaschenbrand) and Leo Veiga (@leo_veiga_).
AND HERE’S MODI
Noah Rinsky
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Episode 128: Noah Rinsky is a writer and the creator of the Instagram account @oldjewishmen. Check out his book, The Old Jewish Men’s Guide to Eating, Sleeping, and Futzing Around.
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Interview With Noah Rinsky
Speaker 1Welcome to and here's Modi . Welcome to and here's Modi . We have an amazing guest in the house , noah Rinsky , the author of the Old Jewish Men's Guide and , obviously , the guy that runs the amazing uh instagram account called old jewish men . That's correct . That's correct , yes , and uh charged , and perriel's here and leo's here , and just those of you who don't have a visual he's 35 years old and looks like he's leaning , leaning into being an old jewish man ?
Speaker 2yeah , like he just sounds like it was based on what he said .
Speaker 1No , he's got um . He's wearing a hat that says ralph lipschitz . Right , and it's brand new with the polo hat , but it looks . It looks like you've had it for 400 years . It looks like it looks sunworn and it looks torn . The hair is , is not you do for a haircut ? Wow , drag our guests right off the bat Go ahead . Yeah , and here's something I love that you're wearing a woman's watch .
Speaker 3I am wearing a woman's watch , you're wearing a woman's watch . Yeah .
Speaker 1Which means someone gave it to you and you said I'll just wear this , it was a free watch . It was a free watch .
Speaker 2I'll wear a free watch ? I don't think so . I think it was a stylistic choice and he's working on it .
Speaker 1He's made it into a stylistic choice . What's the story behind ?
Speaker 3the watch I collect , mostly women's tag for your watches . Really , yeah , why , I don't know . I like the way they look . They kind of look like toys to me and the price is kind of right , they actually have . They seem to appreciate pretty well . I mean , actually , since I started buying them , I've probably done three , four , x .
Speaker 1You've sold . I've shopped , but you haven't sold any of the ones you bought .
Speaker 2No but I've broken two . You've broken't sold any of the ones you bought Modi's the big watch guy , but I've broken two .
Speaker 1You've broken two .
Speaker 3Okay .
Speaker 2Sold zero , broken two . I like this on you . I also like when a woman has a big fat male's guy watch on , guy watch on and it's like slinking and sliding all down her wrist .
Speaker 3This one is actually… . This face is bigger than the normal women's ones , like the old little F1 watches . Those are tiny .
Speaker 1Very tiny . I've seen guys pull off thin women's Rolexes the little , small , small , small ones , but like very dainty guys , very classy , like tall bone , thin , they can pull it off . It may look like I would look like a mess .
Speaker 3I'm kind of neither I'm somewhere .
Speaker 1I'm oddly proportioned . Move your hat back a little bit . You have such a pretty face and it's all hidden . It's all hidden there . Yeah , so old Jewish men , what the hell .
Speaker 4How did that start ?
Speaker 1I really hate to be like whatever other podcast you're on , how did you get one where you go into all Jewish men ? But what the hell ?
Speaker 2You want to go into this business , yeah .
Speaker 3As my brother says .
Speaker 2We have to pause .
Speaker 4Sorry , pause , sorry , you might have heard of it somewhere , find it . Yeah , that's what we cut out of it . We have to pause . Sorry , pause Depends who you ask . My husband wouldn't say that .
Speaker 1Did you catch the beginning ? Okay , perfect , perfect . I don't want it to be like every other podcast you're doing . I don't want to be asking you the same and make you the same . I fucking hate people do that to me . But we have to set up some background about this thing , because people are like what the hell does this really exist ? Does this thing really exist ?
Speaker 4well , you have a good answer . You told me at the cellar it's because your dad moved to Israel and you missed him yeah , that's kind of the story . I mean , it doesn't have to be the story . That is a good story . It sounds great . His parents live in Israel , but you can say that too . Where in Israel do your parents ?
Speaker 2live in Israel , but you can say that too .
Speaker 1Where in Israel do your parents live ? Oh wow , no , he's kidding . Oh my God , oh my .
Speaker 4God , I was like shut up , no Stop .
Speaker 1That was funny , though that was funny when Zichroniak beautiful with the wineries and all that .
Speaker 4And by the way , his wife is like this like big shot , like fashionista , like does she work at Vogue ? Yeah , so it's , she worked at Vogue .
Speaker 1What does she do now ?
Speaker 4She's like a fashion writer , right yeah .
Speaker 1Let me see a picture of her . She's a fashion writer , right ? Yeah , let me see a picture of her . She's beautiful . I'm sure she's stunning .
Speaker 3Oh well , here's the one I have on my phone . This is every time I look down at my phone .
Speaker 2Oh .
Speaker 3What time are you coming home ? What ?
Speaker 1time , are you coming ?
Speaker 3home .
Speaker 1I have to get context of what .
Speaker 4What's going on , yeah ?
Speaker 1yeah , yeah , testing one two testing thank you , wolf .
Speaker 4Thank you for catching that okay why don't you ask it ?
Speaker 1ask it again yeah , so old jewish men .
Speaker 3What made that be like your , your thing well , I , I guess , to give some context , I think I was 20 , I was 25 , 26 at the time and , uh , I really really needed a win . And when you start something or dig your heels into something , I think like old Jewish men , where you're kind of carving out an area of the internet with probably the lowest chance of success , any positive metric , any positive feedback , you're going to pursue . I think it's kind of . What happened is I was visiting my folks and I was taking some videos of my dad and maybe I had 200 followers or something on Instagram . I was actually kind of late to the game and maybe I had 30 people say this is pretty good . So I was doing nothing with my life at that point that I'm chasing this . So I got back to New York and I was living on East Broadway in the Lower East Side at the time with my brother . We were sharing a studio apartment where ?
Speaker 1in East Broadway ?
Speaker 3East Broadway and Clinton Street , like right , you know , we lived . Actually I know it very well , we lived underneath that Stiebel , the famous Stiebel on East Broadway 247 .
Speaker 1There's like 12 of them in a row over there .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 1Yes , and each one has a minion of six people .
Speaker 3Yes , yeah .
Speaker 1And they all walk across the bridge to actually dive in there . Oh , the Bjarne Stiebel . Yes , the Bjarne .
Speaker 3Stiebel yes , yes , I live below it . Wow , they used to knock on our door to make a minion .
Speaker 1The building looks like it… . They have done nothing to it since 1950 . Nothing , Nothing . The sign is worn out and it said that's where you lived .
Speaker 3Oh my god , yeah , we had a rat crawl on my brother in his sleep one time . The poor rat . That's how filthy our apartment was . Oh my god , god , okay , go ahead . Um , anyway , so we're living there . We were sharing this uh apartment together and , um , I just started taking photographs of , uh , kind of all the old jewish guys are in the neighborhood , just basically that kind of like that block photography kind of yeah okay it's , it wasn't what it is now .
Speaker 3You know , now it's like a more of a celebration . Back then I was that kind of like that block Photography kind of yeah , okay , it wasn't what it is now . You know , now it's like more of a celebration . Back then I was in kind of a dark place . What's the year ? Give me a year 2016 , 2015
The Rise of an Instagram Account
Speaker 3, 2016 . Did you ever meet Hirsch Huber ? If I saw his face , yeah , I'm sure I met them all . Yeah , because because my brother was the president of Staten Street Shul , and so that was really where we went .
Speaker 1Wow . The rabbi there now is very close to our rabbi . He actually we just did Slichus together with them . Who's the current rabbi there ? I forgot his name Benjamin , benjamin , something .
Speaker 3But Bodner was our rabbi . You probably , I'm sure you know You're both Israeli too .
Speaker 2All right guys . No , let them do the Jewish geography , no I don't know , I actually don't know .
Speaker 3I actually heard that Stan Street was between rabbis .
Speaker 1I think they found one now , but they got . He's very close to all rabbis .
Speaker 2And they're combining .
Speaker 1It's very cute . It's very nice . They should have unity with the synagogue .
Speaker 3So you were in a dark place .
Speaker 2You were in a dark place and you were taking photos of these guys in the neighborhood .
Speaker 4And you were like 30 people is 30 people yeah .
Speaker 3I had a very dedicated fan following on this very humble page , but the page at that point was just street photography of mostly miserable-looking old guys in the rain and I would attribute a fake quote to them Life , first it's agony , then it's misery and then you die Stuff like that .
Speaker 1Right .
Speaker 3Something uplifting . Yeah , and that was basically the page . Yeah , and I did one event uh , this is when nobody was doing instagram page . It was just not , it was unheard of and especially considering that I didn't have anyone really following me . So I did this thing called lock scotch and talk at sand street shul . It was really like an urban geography event . I think I got maybe 20 , you know Alta Kakas to come and speak about the old neighborhood . Whoa . It was really nice it was extremely boring , but everyone liked that .
Speaker 2That's well . You probably made a really nice moment for them to get together and just like have a sense of community for a second because that area and that neighborhood Needed it . Yeah , Big time , a sense of community for a second because that area in that neighborhood needed .
Speaker 1It is yeah big time we had next to . We live in that neighborhood and we next door to us was an elderly man , hirsch huber , and we took care of him and he went to that synagogue which he couldn't when . The lower east side on the lower east side okay , um and uh , so we , we , we know them and they all know me too , but but uh , it's it's , but it's .
Speaker 2Were you aiming for , like the portraits of them on the street to be like artistic in a way , or funny Like ? Is it like artistic street photography ?
Speaker 3I wanted to capture realism Like I wanted to capture .
Speaker 2Then you added a funny caption . Yeah .
Speaker 3Okay , but it wasn't pictures of them smiling .
Speaker 1No , they don't smile , they stop smiling .
Speaker 4Never smile .
Speaker 1So they all got together . Even when they're happy , it's not like oh , someone's making a kiddish , oh , someone's paying for lunch . You'd think they would make them happy . Oh , someone's paying for lunch Okay , right , it's not them happy . Oh , someone's paying for lunch Okay , it's not a happy . There's nothing . Happy to their Right , go ahead .
Speaker 4You must have been shocked when this thing blew up .
Speaker 2We're not there yet . I want to hear more about how we got there Go ahead .
Speaker 3The lock session talk Raskin's fish sponsored the thing I don't know . If you know raskin yes I'm sure you do um and uh to this day . I can't believe they did it . I just did you , just cold reach out to them . I cold reached out to them good I said we're doing a community event with this instagram account .
Speaker 3And , um , they , I remember going down there I was so poor and cheap at the time that I hand carried all the locks back with my friend helped me on the train oh , because we were , you know , an uber from crown heights to lower east side , you know . But I remember that , yeah , it was , uh , my buddy helped me and , um , what was I going to say ?
Speaker 3And then , after that , Instagram's blowing up but yeah , I mean , I basically kind of For years , I ran it like that for a couple years . After that , I was just kind of doing the same , mostly doing the same thing . Then I put out I don't know why I did it , but I put out a run of t-shirts at some point in 2019 and I had like old jewish man for president with bernie sanders on it . You know , yeah , I've seen those . Yeah , yeah . So I put those out and I think I did a run of like 36 shirts and they sold out like immediately . It was basically this kind of thing where people dm me their address and I venmoed me and then I went to the post office and the whole thing was late I lost package .
Speaker 3It was terrible , horrible . I had no system .
Speaker 3I probably lost money , but I realized that there was demand yeah I had no experience in the , you know , in the online or schmata business or anything . And then I um , I contacted a friend of mine business guy and he said well , my business partner's brother , brian , is an e-commerce guy . You guys should link up . And so to this day , I don't understand why , brian , he must have looked at the page and thought , you know , yeah , why , why would he say yes to this ? You why ? Why would he say yes to this ? You know , why would he say , yeah , I'm going to take this on , you know ? So I remember he designed the website for me . He put everything you know on the back end e-commerce . He plugged it in , you know , and he said you can either pay me 200 bucks , which is very cheap and very reasonable , or , you know , we can work on this together with no agreement really in place very shark tank , yeah and I thought what do you like about this ?
Speaker 3you know , why would you want to work on this really ? And he , he said I think there's a voice . You know it's got really got its own kind of voice , as sure . You know what else am I doing ? I was bartending at the time , you know writing . I was making you know , uh , web series with my brother , actually , maybe that point but we made a web series on that block called Cellar Dwellers . Really , yeah , all on East Broadway , that's cool .
Speaker 2But yeah , so you're bartending , doing that , and then this guy helps you with the e-commerce side of things .
Speaker 3Yeah , and then we did a . I moved to during COVID . I moved to Berlin for a while , Then I moved to Israel , Then I came back . I did a casting call . We got a bunch of guys For old . Jewish men , for old Jewish men , and and then we just kind of went . It was off to the races after that .
Speaker 1A casting call for what Old .
Speaker 3Jewish men Old .
Speaker 2Jewish men , old Jewish men , to like be in the videos .
Speaker 1To be in the videos . To be in the videos , yeah , wow , okay , we had an idea I had .
Speaker 3You know , we had , probably um a document with you know , 40 different sketch ideas we wanted to pursue over the summer . Okay , just different . On the street , were you paying these old men or they got paid ?
Speaker 2they got paid . They got paid .
Speaker 3Yeah , sag old men like sag uh sad guys were hesitant to do it , but some of them were sag .
Speaker 2But they're not accepting not getting sag wages really , yeah , you're paying , all right , yeah , and where does this ?
Speaker 1live what's that ? Where does that live on the page on instagram ?
Speaker 3okay , okay and I think we we did a pop-up sale that basically funded the entire kind of project . We did a pop-up shop at do you remember ? Global International on Orchard Street ? A hundred percent , yes , we love the component Global .
Speaker 1International you can get suits . Find suits from all over the world . The guy walks around the street pulling people into the store .
Speaker 4Oh , my God .
Speaker 1What's his name ? Sammy Glick . Sammy Glick .
Speaker 3Yeah , sammy Glick , he's barking . Yeah , he's barking .
Speaker 1It's called Global International Suit . It's not like it's global . It's global and international . It's an orchard on the corner . Oh my God . Well , now it's some streetwear shop .
Speaker 2Yeah , it's not like that .
Speaker 4And you have like this like pretty robust merch line , like that hat is theirs . They did a collab with like New Balance .
Speaker 3But not at that point . No , no , no , but at this point we had , you know . Basically we were crossing our penises .
Speaker 4This thing was going to take off .
Speaker 3We basically put out three items , three or four items . That's your camera by the way .
Speaker 1Oh , just in case you want to ever show the people your face . Yeah , yeah , that would be it . No , I know , but he's like to . He's talking to in between Periel and the wall .
Speaker 4I just wanted you to know that you have a camera here on you , in case you want them to know how beautiful you are .
Speaker 1Yeah , he's like , now he's shy , you got him off track , okay , so you , you had this store at Global International clothing .
Speaker 3So we threw this pop-up event with our merchandise at global international yeah with the main item . Was this hat , was these , were these hats ?
Speaker 3the ralph , lipschitz ralph lipschitz hat yeah we put out this thing and that got us , you know , in uh , you know , maybe got in a magazine or two or something . Someone wrote us up or whatever a minor thing . And then we had the pop-up sale to fund , um , the on the street stuff , and we were making this , a short movie called ojm capital , which was about all the old Jewish guys working at a hedge fund together in an office . And after that , sammy , he liked the foot traffic of the event , so he offered us a pop up booth at Global International and the amount of fighting that ensued for the next year of my life was Between you and Sammy . Yeah , it was unbelievable . This kind of fighting doesn't exist anymore . I don't think .
Speaker 2Yeah , it was it's like that's so funny .
Speaker 4What were you fighting about you ?
Speaker 1only give me $200 . You only give me $200 .
Speaker 3You only give me $200 . Come in , this is my shop . I've been paying the electric . He's like this guy . He offered you the booth . He offered us the booth because he wanted the foot traffic and we lowballed him , of course , because he was like you got a dead store in here , no one's coming in here Dead Dead Store .
Speaker 1I'll give you more on this If you want more on this . Sammy Glick , I own a part of the building that's the back of his building . So on Ludlow there's a building that Leo's actually an owner of it too , because we were already married when I bought this , so we wanted to meet with him to buy his building , to buy this building , and you can't figure out if he owns it or not .
Speaker 1And he comes up with these stories and I can't triple net lease . Maybe you're gonna lend it out and I'm gonna lease it out to you . I'm gonna bring you out and Leo's experiencing this . And it's like we met with me , johnny Dina's husband . We met with him to go see him about the building . God .
Speaker 2I totally got it , oh yeah .
Speaker 1We totally know what you're talking about . If anybody , if you're ever on Ludlow , if you're on Orchard between Grand and Hester it is , by the way , a vibe . It's called Dime Square now and there's , like these amazing shops and out of nowhere , you just see this sign , there's this old signage from like , literally from the 40s , where it says like , global , international clothings , fine clothes , and sometimes they say two pairs of slacks with every suit , like , literally .
Speaker 2That's where that do you still live in that area ? No , no , I don't like the dime square .
Speaker 1His wife probably said that was cute for a minute he's like no , I'm in the West Village now .
Speaker 3Things are really popping . No , I live in Brooklyn , okay .
Speaker 1Because that area . So yeah , it's changed . Yeah , but go
Exploring New York City Characters
Speaker 1ahead . I think I left .
Speaker 3I think everyone always says I left just to . I got the good part , you know . But yeah , I mean there were still good businesses there when I feel like I left , I probably left the neighborhood .
Speaker 1It really blew up even more , more and more and more and more .
Speaker 3It totally blew it up .
Speaker 1I think so continue . You're dealing with this guy in the store .
Speaker 3I'd also want to know if he owns the top apartments . I don't know , because I know he owns the basement and the but whatever he rents out the basements .
Speaker 4He doesn't .
Speaker 1I don't think he owns . Have you ever seen what's down there ? I did . It's horrible .
Speaker 3It's those guys that the people that clean up the area store their dreck downstairs and there's a guy that he had renting it out , a thing that kind of was living down there and also on a sewing machine .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah yeah , it's not a cute . Global international , global international , we're making you a fine suit .
Speaker 4Okay , meanwhile , meanwhile , this guy's like running like a sweatshop out of his basement .
Speaker 1No , no , he's just .
Speaker 3Well , it's gone now anyway , but it's got , it's got , it's got , it's got , it's got , it's got it's got , it's got it's got , it's got , it's got , it's got , it's got it of this pop-up shop event .
Speaker 3We're all kind of waiting for people to have sorry , for people to come getting the thing together and Sammy's in a rotten , rotten mood , like unusually rotten Really , and he comes out of the bathroom , he goes . I'm very sorry , I've been in a terrible mood , but I just went in the bathroom , I passed a kidney stone the size of a bean and then he just kind of waddles out . Yeah , he's good to go and went right into the street .
Speaker 1He would follow people all the way down to cats's delicatessen to tell him come , I'm gonna make you a suit , we're gonna get you a suit he's a hustler he's a hustler .
Speaker 4How old is this guy ?
Speaker 1he's literally like in the comedy clubs barking yeah , he's barking for people to come in and buy suits . That's so funny . Johnny bought a blazer from him , just so we can find out what's going on with the building . Oh my God , that's hysterical we're trying to figure out what's going on . The building is right behind our building on Ludlow so we tried to figure out with him what's going on the property line whether this is , and we went in .
Speaker 4How much was the blazer the ?
Speaker 3whatever dirt cheap I mean it's you can really haggle . One time my brother went in there to get a suit and he goes how much ? Because 500 . Remember I was like I'll give you 80 bucks so then he'll say to him I'm gonna give you two for 80 , but I'm gonna give you four for 400 .
Speaker 1It's really , it's just it's .
Speaker 2I don't know where they get these suits , so you have this pop-up shop and then you're able to fund this like production with these actors that you've hired . Yeah , and , and what was that like ? What were some of the skits you did that ? Yeah , you stand out to , or ?
Speaker 3your favorite . Thinking back on it , it was a really ridiculous summer because you basically had this stable of old men , all of them over , all of them safely safe to say over 70 .
Speaker 2At that point you say you have a pasture of old men because they're certainly not in a stable . But keep going . Yeah , pasture .
Speaker 3Yes , One of the guys . This guy , Billy Weeds , was the only guy that wasn't a Jew . He was almost Jew passing , but he was so weird looking that he was just good .
Speaker 2Everyone loved him and he was the oldest of the crew . I think he was the oldest the crew . I think he was .
Speaker 3He was the personnel , yeah , and we just couldn't say no to him . He was so passionate about it and he goes no , you know , I'm not even jewish , right , I'm okay , it's okay . It's like I can be a jew for you , though I can , I you know . Right , he was like 85 , and so we'd go around , we'd spend these hot days you know , it was like in the dead of summer and we did stuff like we would buy a live fish in Chinatown and the guys would try to sell it to Russ and Daughters .
Speaker 1Oh my god Hilarious .
Speaker 3I just caught this in the East River and he's trying to sell it to them Kind of like a Borat style or… yeah , Like not everyone was in on what was happening .
Speaker 2No , yeah , no , no , we walk in there with a huge fish and we… so like the real thing .
Speaker 3No , we walk in there with the huge fish and we , so we one of us goes in there with the little camera and hides in the eye . Actually , you know you're gonna buy something . It waits five minutes , the old man will come in and then trailing him is another guy with the camera . Guy , you wanna buy the fish , you know . And then they come out and they really knew it was almost like they expected it . It was so weird because they just handled it like what kind of fish is it ? No way .
Speaker 3It's like she knew Now Nikki Fetterman .
Speaker 4Yeah , it's almost like she knew Terrible , you know .
Speaker 3My favorite gag that we used to do . That was it was really funny . What we would do is we would take we would have two of these old guys dress up in suits and we'd go to one of these fruit or hot dog vendors . You get a Bangladeshi guy who can barely speak English . If one of the guys woke up to him and go , excuse me , I absolutely love your business . I love everything about you , your look , the way you talk to your customers , thank you , thank you , thank you . Do you have an agent ? Do you have any representation ? I'd love to sign you . We're taking guys on right now , no idea who he's talking about , and then another guy would come in hey , that's my client , get away from my client . And then they're just yelling at each other .
Speaker 1You kids , bangladeshi guy .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 1No idea what's going on .
Speaker 3No idea what's going on , you're going to buy something or not . Oh my god , that's genius . That's , that's genius .
Speaker 1And your book , your book , my book . Yeah , your book , your book , by the way . So we , you know we , when we tape uh the podcast , sometimes we do a few in a row . So we had uh dana bash the uh cnn correspondent . Oh , yeah , she wrote a book called america's deadliest election , which was like this super intellectual comparison of like the 18 .
Speaker 1It was the 1872 gubernatorial election of Louisiana , and how it's , the contractions of what's happening with today's election in the world and prejudice and the black vote and all that . It was a super intellectual book . I couldn't read it because I can't read , but Leo gobbled it up on plane rides . This book is written for me .
Speaker 2Yeah , because there's pictures .
Speaker 1A . There's pictures B there's short little stents and little I hate to say it on a toilet . Of course , this is it . It's made for that . This is made for whoever sits in toilets .
Speaker 2Absolutely , of course . This is it it's made for that .
Speaker 1This is made for whoever sits in toilets . Absolutely pass a kidney stone . Yeah , yes , yeah , it's so , it's so good , and there's like , it's like , there's like so read the whole .
Speaker 2Read the whole title . Why don't you ?
Speaker 1uh-uh , look , maury , a book for us . No , that's the , that's on top . The Old Jewish Men's Guide 2 . And then Eating , sleeping and Fussing Around Includes how to schmooze like a pro , advanced deli strategies . Golf Schwitz , repeat the art of baldness . Useful Marjan , this is all on the cover . This is all on the cover . Useful Marjan throwouts uh , he's blowing he's blowing his nose .
Speaker 2This is so unbranded , it's insane .
Speaker 1Keep going no , no , this is perfect . This . I've never heard such amazing acoustics . It's perfect . And he had a schmata on him and he had that like he . He didn't ask for a napkin . Wow , okay , the complete handbook of how to blow your nose on a podcast . Um , the complete handbook for thriving in this . Fakak the world , noah rinsky . Illustrations by dick carroll . It is uh , it's such a fun read .
Speaker 2So what are some advanced deli strategies ?
Speaker 1no hold on let's just go into . He goes into the class clown . So this is uh again . Pictures are adorable , the illustrations are great , super easy .
Speaker 1I love these types of books yeah yeah , and then he has like the big , the big jewish comedians on here and he has , uh , rodney dangerfield . I haven't spoken to my wife in years . I didn't want to interrupt her . Amazing , how great is that ? Jackie mason , I have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something . Gilbert godfrey's , the chronicle of racha , blessed memory . If somebody else is paying for it . If somebody else is paying for it , food just tastes a lot better , which , if you know him , it's so true , andy Kaufman , I never told a joke in my life . He probably never did . He probably never told a joke . Joke , don Rickles , you don't have to call me
Sauna Etiquette and Unexpected Perks
Speaker 1sir . King of Jews is enough enough , it's just , it's easy . And then you put it down , you don't have to finish it . There's no , you know , and there's no through line there .
Speaker 3There's no , there's certain um , there's certain you know , things that you can do to improve your general , uh , existence in the world , to expedite , you know dying not to expedite dying necessarily , oh , living . But you know if you want to get , if you want to , you know cut the line . You want to learn how to . You know kind of haggle with the deli slicer , get the best cut of meat , get the best table sit for longer , you know maximize your experience in the sauna , you know , whatever these kind of things , the things you don't really think about , little cheat codes .
Speaker 1Give us one sauna . What's the sauna trick ? The sauna trick . I love a sauna and I love a steam . Cody loves a sauna .
Speaker 3Yeah , sauna it's a sauna trick , the sauna trick . I love a sauna and I love the sauna . Yeah , me too . Well , in the book . The book says um , you can't be anything but naked obviously I don't agree in the sauna or around the sauna .
Speaker 1You also said in the book that you should never join any golf club that doesn't have a schvitz or a sauna . Yeah , yeah , if he doesn't have a steamer or sauna do not join this golf club .
Speaker 2You're saying you have to be naked .
Speaker 3You should be naked , no .
Speaker 2I have a towel on . Leave me alone . Keep going , okay .
Speaker 3Well , in the book , you know , we recommend being naked because it's a sign of confidence , even even if you're not well endowed . There's nothing to do with how endowed you are , but the towel makes people kind of doubt . You Do you ?
Speaker 2want that ? Okay , honey , the goods speak for themselves . I don't need .
Speaker 1Yeah , it's again an interesting read , an interesting angle . I don't happen to agree with that one . That's fine , right , the towel , first of all . You have the towel on you . You have what to wipe your face , do you understand ? When you're schwitzing , you can carry the towel . Oh , so you're just saying to carry the towel but just be naked ? Okay , now there's this thing called scabies . Did you ever hear about those ? Those are little animals that live on the seat .
Speaker 2I'm saying don't , you don't want to sit bare ass on the wood okay , you shouldn't .
Speaker 3No , no , no don't do that that's a common no , no , no , no . I'm saying carry the towel . You carry the towel , you spread it out , you sit naked and to your point . Uh , leo , it's not about you know , it's not about the this , this , what's underneath it . Really , it's just whether or not you're wearing it .
Speaker 2It's just a sign of weakness , no matter what you have under there unless you , unless it's hanging out at the bottom , everyone will know I'm the only non-Jew in the sauna . That's where the mission is Okay .
Speaker 3That's a power move too .
Speaker 2They'll be like how'd you get into ?
Speaker 3this club .
Speaker 2It'll be a whole thing . We don't have to In interacting with all of these older people , because I feel like it's such a subset of our society that so often gets overlooked and pushed to the side and no one cares Like , did you have any like sort of actually poignant takeaways or moments that like they actually taught you something that you ?
Speaker 3You mean the old men that I hang out with ? Yeah , so I was just I just flew-country with one of the guys , this guy , dave , for this event .
Speaker 4I knew it was Dave .
Speaker 3Yeah , I've traveled with him several times now . How old is Dave ? He's 74 . Okay , 74? .
Speaker 2Yeah .
Speaker 3But he's Still travelable . Yeah , still not . He's really up for anything . Okay , he's a slow walker , mobile , though he's mobile . And the funniest thing happened actually um , so his wife , his wife , so his wife calls me in the morning and basically says all right , I'm gonna , you know , get you , get you and dave , to the airport , me at Sheepshead Bay , and then we'll drive you to Kennedy . So I thought it was going to be both of them . You know , when I got in the car , I got into Sheepshead Bay and she's there , and as soon as I get in the car , she's going .
Speaker 3Okay , so Dave's got his , he's got his pre-check , he's got his clear , he has a TSA . Blah , blah , blah , walk in . Just make sure that , dave . You know blah blah is going this way and that way and you know blah blah . You're gonna understand . I didn't understand anything she said and it had me a little nervous . I've traveled with him before and I it takes some patience because he's very slow . You know blah blah . And so , dave , you know we get in the airport , it's me and dave . He opens his phone . He said I got nothing .
Speaker 2I was like I had a blessed boarding pass nothing .
Speaker 3I got my ID , I got my passport , I got my pills . Other than that I got I really have nothing . I'm like . I'm like , well , you do have pre-check and clear , don't you go ? Yeah , yeah , yeah , I got it . I was like , well , I don't , and I kind of look and I was like we only got 45 minutes to this flight .
Speaker 1I got to get through the . You have to have a boarding card .
Speaker 3No , I don't know these days . He had just clear . He had clear , no , no , no , he has clear , he has TSA pre-check , but he didn't have proof of any of that stuff . Okay , all he had . Really , I feel like that works . I'm following , yes , and so I go to security . I was thinking like he'll get there , he'll get there , and I get to the gate and I call him . He's not there . I said , dave , where are you ?
Speaker 3Yeah , I'll see you in a second . So he kind of like hobbles up to me . I said what happened . He said as soon as you left , some guy points to me and goes are you the rotisserie chicken ?
Speaker 1guy .
Speaker 2The .
Speaker 1Costco guy . Oh wow , and he goes From one of the videos . Yeah , one of the videos , yeah .
Speaker 3He goes , come with me , and he just shoves him right to the front of the line .
Speaker 1Oh , my God .
Speaker 3Pulls him right to security . Dave's got a huge bottle of liquid with him , of course , he brings it on the plane . Oh , oh , my god . And we go on the plane and then , just you know , last night , when we're flying out , we were walking by the Delta Lounge the guy goes hey , congratulations , I saw that they . They ended your band . Your suspension at Costco is over oh my god congratulations . And I was like . I was like , do you mind , can you , can you pass us for this ? You go , come on in , oh no way .
Speaker 1Wow , that is so great , that is so great . That is it's like when we go to LL .
Speaker 4Yeah , why does he get banned ? I saw that video . Why was ?
Speaker 3he banned from Cosplay .
Speaker 1You guys , they know you at the LL lounge well , when we fly to LL , I mean the whole people flying there know me . Yeah , so it's like the guys that do the security also . Just bring me right through .
Speaker 3Yeah , incredible , yeah , yeah , so that's great how often you doing comedy in in israel we've been there twice since the war we did one show in jerusalem in june and we just did a show in tel aviv in september . Yeah , how's the book sales going ? It was a USA Today bestseller , wow .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah .
Speaker 3Congratulations . Thank you .
Speaker 1It deserves this . It's really done well . It's really really done well and you really are , and all Jewish men .
Comedic Banter and Personal Stories
Speaker 1There's just so much to learn from them , but it takes patience .
Speaker 3Yes .
Speaker 1You have to take them . They don't move in the way that they don't . They're not in the same um bpms in , uh , in the music . Yeah , they'll get there and they'll tell you something and they'll be a nugget of information that'd be like , wow , what an amazing piece of information .
Speaker 2But to get there it takes a minute yeah it takes a minute yeah , it's just so funny that I opened to this page um the schwitz in Detroit . Yeah , my friend who lives in Detroit , just like yesterday , the day before , texted me like I heard of this place , the Schwitz . You and Modi would love it . You need to come next time you're in Detroit .
Speaker 3It's a whole thing . It's a cult it got bought out by like a . They're like giving it to him , an Irish guy . We filmed a short film there called Sona Dreams last year about a guy who's trying to… . We recreated the World Sona Championships at that Schwitz in Detroit .
Speaker 2What's the World Sona Championship ?
Speaker 3I saw that . Yeah , you saw it . Yeah , oh yeah .
Speaker 1Wait , you saw the movie ? No , no , no , I saw about it .
Speaker 3Oh yeah .
Speaker 1Yeah , so tell us about it .
Speaker 3Oh yeah , so the World S the World Sauna Championships were a real thing in Finland until 2012 . They had to cancel it because a couple guys died , died . Yeah , a couple , not just one , a couple guys . Two guys died in 2012 , I think .
Speaker 2It's just who can stay in the sauna the longest .
Speaker 3Yeah .
Speaker 4That's insane .
Speaker 3A 2-3-0 . Oh yeah , so roast your skin . I mean , it boils your blood .
Speaker 4Oh my God , Wait a second . Why did Dave get banned from Costco ?
Speaker 1Unruly behavior . Oh my God , Unruly behavior .
Speaker 2Can I read just another section I've just opened up to ? If fortune cookies were written for old Jewish men , okay One . An incredible bowel movement is coming your way . First of all , that's a great omen For everybody , because once that happens it's a great day . Um , a faithful diuretic is a welcome friend . True , smile once in a while and you might get more free tea again . Maximizing ignore chest pain . It's all in your head , that's sure . I'm not going to stand by that one . Be wary of those who ask you to schlep .
Speaker 2I just asked questions about schleping for people on the last podcast You'll never get better at golf and you still have to tip , even though it's Christmas .
Speaker 1Oh , that's great . Where'd you come up with all these ideas in the book ? Just ?
Speaker 3like the little segments . Yeah , yeah , there's so many of them , there's so many , there are all , really so it's so many how .
Speaker 1How did you come up with them ? They're paying me , so I had to oh , you had the oh , you gave the proposal they gave you money , and then you had to come up with it yeah what am I going to do ?
Speaker 3I mean , they I hope they hear this too they fucked up too , because they ordered twice as many words as they needed , so I actually wrote double that . And I'm thinking when I'm turning this in , I'm like this is just ridiculous . I mean , this is all shit . I mean , you know , I mean not all shit , but you know you really got to carve this thing down .
Speaker 1It's not , it's not , don't say that , it's that , it's that , it's , it's that word , but it's , uh , it's , it's nothing that needs . It's a book that sits on the table on shabbos , yeah , when you , when you can't open your phone or your tv and you pick it up and you read a little bit yeah , it's cute and it might spark a conversation and it might remind you of your grandfather or your uncle or whatever , and you can start that talk . There's an energy in the book . The book has an energy . It is a great Shabbos book . It's a great Shabbos book .
Speaker 4It's a great Shabbos book , do you guys ?
Speaker 1keep Shabbos In our way . Yes , yeah , yes .
Speaker 4You have a .
Speaker 3Same thing for me .
Speaker 4In my way . I keep Shabbos too Do you go to synagogue .
Speaker 3I'm a Super Bowl Jew .
Speaker 1So the big ones , I'm there , easter and Christmas is when he goes , that's when he goes .
Speaker 2We call those Choristers .
Speaker 4That's funny . There's a sweet history here . Did Modi do something for your mom ?
Speaker 3Yes , what did I do for your mom ? Yes , I mean it would you may . I can't , I can't tell you how many points I scored with my mom on her birthday . I dm'd Leo and I said you dm'd me directly , not even . I did his account or something it was on Modi's account because I knew that you ran him yeah yeah yeah , yeah , um , it's well known that you run the account .
Speaker 4Thank , god , it's well known , there's help now , but yeah , keep going .
Speaker 3Um , and I just said I don't know . I don't know if he's on cameo . I don't use cameo . I'm happy to you know , I did offer to pay .
Old Jewish Man and Rotisserie Chicken
Speaker 3Can I get a video of modi wishing my mother happy birthday ? Okay , and you got it like the same day , and my mom now , really any time that she's down , she says I just watched the modi video again . What did I say in the video ? You ?
Speaker 2said like happy birthday .
Speaker 3Uh , rita , you know , may you live to be 120 , but you know , blah blah have a , you know , a wonderful year . You have this one , you know , and you said you have this incredible son , noah , and I said to my mom she was so happy with her family text and she , my brother , goes . Modi couldn't have said no , and Ephraim .
Speaker 1Ephraim didn't DM me , so here we are they always oh my god , send my love to your mother and your entire family and Ephraim Ephraim . Oh my god , what's next ? Okay , you have the book . You have this amazing page on instagram . That's killing . What's the page again ? Uh , old jewish man period , that's it , oh , written out . Yeah , old jewish man . Yeah , um , on instagram , and it's fun . I , I popped in and out of there . Um , this is , it's all easy , it's just , oh , it's stuff that gives you a break from , like the news and things of that sort . What else is coming up ? Or just continuation of of the um , I mean for the book .
Speaker 3I'm doing like , um , a little , a small , a modest book tour of the midway in the midwest . I'm going to ann arbor and st louis , all these jccs , and you know , uh , you know little shitholes in jersey and you know little shitholes in Jersey and you know then , we're , what am I ? What are we doing ? Oh , we're putting together well , we're actually we're putting together a , a show that revolves around the old guys and rotisserie chicken . So look out for that .
Speaker 1Rotisserie chicken , by the way , is a very it's not a healthy food .
Speaker 2You always say that .
Speaker 1It's delicious Because the oil it's very delicious , but the oil that comes down , all the oils are coming in from one chicken to the next . It's not a healthy thing . What ?
Speaker 3if you have the one on top .
Speaker 1The one on top is okay , okay .
Speaker 3Can you request that one ? Oh , hey , get the one that's on top .
Speaker 1No , but the one on top doesn't have all the fat and all the chemicals going into the other ones . But yeah , yeah . But rotisserie chicken is delicious period .
Speaker 3Are you concerned at all about your salt intake ? Very much , I have to show you guys . Okay , we did this video in LA . I think you guys would like I had these two guys . I I think it's a good bet . We had these two guys basically sit on the on the side of the street and we had a , a defibrillator , a blood pressure machine .
Speaker 3oh my god and we had a sign that says come , and if you can beat our blood pressure , we'll give you a hundred bucks . And so we had all these people coming up and taking their blood pressure . Was it rigged ? No , oh , somebody beat him by higher .
Speaker 2The hoof get higher . Oh shit , I probably would have beat him .
Speaker 1No , yeah , what was the highest you had over there ?
Speaker 3Somebody hit a really high .
Speaker 2You're like we need to call you Hatsala , yeah .
Speaker 3I mean , his mom was there and he was like she was like check , check , check .
Speaker 1A boy , a young guy , with his mom .
Speaker 3And then a woman . There was a woman there who her blood pressure was extremely high on the reading but I felt like in the moment everyone's yelling at you too and you're probably moving around . It's not really . It can't be an accurate reading . It can't be Because it was kind of crazy high , like the bottom number was the diastolic . Whatever the bottom number was the diastolic . It was like 121 .
Speaker 2Oh my God , you're like… You're actually medically dead right now . Yeah , oh my god yeah . Wow .
Speaker 3The pressure was low .
Speaker 2But so small , what a small thing to do you should organize an outing to bring some of these old Jewish men to like the Beacon Show or something Sure , and do some funny content there . That would be cute .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 2Imagine just a whole row of all these guys .
Speaker 4I heard that one .
Speaker 1It's the staring . It's the staring . Yes , it's that pause they take . It's that the worst thing about ? Again , when you're with old people , it's amazing that you can get such amazing information . I always tell anybody , anybody 20 years older than you listen to them , listen to them .
Speaker 4Is that what you tell , leo ?
Speaker 1Yeah , he does listen . But the one thing that's super annoying is when they're walking with them and talking and they have to tell you something , they stop . Yeah , to emphasize a point , and that's why it was three years later that it took him to get there . They stop , but we could have already been because he just kept walking . But they stop and Dina's father , 93 years old I love him and you know he tells me he goes . I'm going to tell you a story like this , story you never heard . And then he tells the story and goes like this is a story you never heard , right ? Yeah , no , but him I listen to all the time and sometimes it's conversations just how are you doing ? How are you , sweetheart , have a good show and have a good this and that then I don't know where , he'll hit me with some piece of like wisdom , that's like life-changing , like a really good piece , and uh , and old people really have that . They've , really , they've lived life , they've I like that .
Speaker 2You've um shown a light on on some older people yeah , it's important .
Speaker 1I think it's beautiful and uh , that's where the opportunity was you're such a character , you're such a it's like you fit this thing , like you're already . You're 35 and you're already leaning into being an old guy horrible it's horrible .
Speaker 2There are some people who are like I can't wait to get old like . There are some people who are like what is your wife ?
Speaker 1your wife isn't an old woman ? No , she doesn't . Your wife isn't an old woman ?
Speaker 3No , she's like a young , beautiful woman and for some reason she made the mistake of her life .
Speaker 1No , but she must adore you or something , I guess , so it's inexplicable .
Speaker 2He's so charming . Look at him , he's adorable .
Speaker 1I'm telling you . That's why I keep telling him to look at the camera .
Speaker 2He's hiding his face and he's nice to old people that's such a green flag .
Speaker 1It's such a you're going to go to heaven .
Speaker 4Now he keeps looking at the camera .
Speaker 1No , no , you're going to . It's yo taking care of the elderly people .
Speaker 2You probably gave them so much Nachas yeah .
Speaker 1And what to do . And you know people , a casting call for an older person . I mean , wow , it's an amazing thing .
Speaker 4I have been around these guys and I can attest to the fact that they are just in heaven . They are like so sparkly and like so excited and people come up to them and you know it's like a big page , like people recognize them and they are just lit up . It's really .
Speaker 1It's so wonderful . That's real Mashiach energy . Hey , thank you , that's real , real Mashiach energy , bringing such light and happiness to people and all that by the way , I think about a bit that you had .
Speaker 3Years ago I was at this small show at Yonah Schimmel's and you did a bit there .
Speaker 4Oh wow , that was a while ago , yeah , I just remember .
Speaker 3You said something like you're like . People are always asking me . You know you like Seinfeld , you like Curb , blah , blah , blah . The rest of them are just . I don't watch Jewish shows . No , I'm around Jews all the time . When I get home , I want to watch . I want to watch Goyim .
Speaker 1It's in the special oh , it's in the special . Yeah , it's such a good bit .
Speaker 3I think about that a lot , because people ask you know this Jewish actor ? He's so much… I don't watch any of that . I don't watch .
Speaker 1Maisel , any of them ? No , I don't want to see any of that . I want to see Goyim . I want to see Goyim in Alaska .
Speaker 2He wants to watch the Crown .
Speaker 1I want to see Goyim in Alaska drilling and pulling out trees . And have you ever seen these ?
Speaker 4shows Swamp People , swamp People .
Speaker 1Those guys that ocean . They're looking for the shrimp and they're ripping and the boat's sinking and the and the waves are flying and they're wearing this raincoat . That's what I want to watch . Yeah , I don't want to watch larry david order a bagel . I did . I want to watch guyan . That's what I watched , yeah , yeah looking for a shrimp in the deadliest catch .
Speaker 1I going to risk my life , because my father used to risk his life to catch these fish Fat Disgusting crabs they're catching out there . All right , I cannot thank you enough for coming on .
Speaker 1Thank you for having me on this is probably airing a little bit after New Year's , but still I wish you and your wife and everybody you're working with a happy , healthy New Year full of Moshiach energy . Bring light and laughter to everybody working with a happy , healthy new year full of Mashiach energy . Bring light and laughter to everybody . The book is the Old Jewish Man's Guide to what's the full title Eating .
Speaker 2Sleeping and Fussing Around Okay so that's the by Noah Rinsky and illustrated by Dick Carroll , available everywhere .
Speaker 1Available everywhere . Fussing is a by the way .
Speaker 2I love that word . I've adopted that word .
Speaker 1Well , yeah , so fuzzing . I want to discuss fuzzing for a little bit . Leo and I , b'hoshem , bought a house in Connecticut where you know , just an escape from the city and you'd be setting up a house . You really hate being around Jews and you God forbid . And fuzzing is is how do you even explain ? But you're moving one thing to the next and this there's a task . Like modi , hang this picture up drill bit , uh , drill , screw , boom , measure , bop , bop .
Speaker 2the task , the task is done , but futzing has no end futzing is when you think you're lining up to do tasks but then none of them happen . That's .
Speaker 4That's a good one too , yeah or if like , yeah , you're not doing anything right you're futzing , no , but you think you are . But you think around different than putzing around ?
Speaker 1yeah yes I don't know let's , let's see the expert .
Speaker 3Yes , I'm gonna take this one to the parliament . Get official ruling on this .
Speaker 1Futzing is your . You're moving . So if you're just in the room leo's answering emails or whatever it is , I'm . I'm clearing the table , but I'm sometimes I put something somewhere but then I bring it back , you know , and it's just that that's a futz . There's nothing really happening with it . A task is a beginning and an end , but but futzing is . Hit us up and let us know what you think futzing , putzing and tasks are . At any rate , the book is available there . The Instagram page is Old Jewish Men . You're amazing . I'm so happy we got to hang with you .
Speaker 1Happy , healthy New Year Tour Dates .
Speaker 2You want to do , it Do you want to do the whole thing .
Speaker 1Yeah , give it to them .
Speaker 2All right , it's going Zurich , starting in November , followed by London . Then we go to Skokie , illinois , for two shows , november 13 , 14 . Then we're in St Paul , minnesota , montreal , for two shows , november 30th and December 1st Still tickets available for December 1st . Then we're in Denver , colorado , december 5th . New York , the Beacon Theater . December 17 , 18 , and 19th . The 18th and 19th are sold out . If you want to go , get your tickets for the 17th now . Don't come crying to me when everything is full . Uh , then we are in austin , texas , january 21st . Houston , texas , january 23rd . Phoenix , arizona , february 2nd , tampa , february 13th , fort lauderdale . We have like a bunch of shows we've added there . We just keep adding shows february 16th and 17th . There might be more coming .
Speaker 2Um , then we go back to london , february
Comedy Show Tour Announcement
Speaker 227th . For everyone who couldn't get tickets to the november 6th show at the palladium , at the palladium , uh . Baltimore , the lyric theater . March 2nd , las vegas , nevada . I've gotten a lot of requests for las vegas , march 8th . And then we go to la , march 20th , hartford , connecticut , the Bushnell Theater . March 23rd . Pittsburgh , march 26th . Then we go to Buffalo and then we wrap things up in Toronto on March 30th .
Speaker 1Oh man , be the friend that brings the friends to the comedy show that is Mashiach Energy . Don't just get tickets for you and your spouse or your friend . Buy a bunch of tickets . By the time the show gets there , people are going to be looking for you for those tickets . Everything is available on modilivecom . Thank you very much , noah , for being a part of today's episode . And thank you to our . Did we talk about our sponsors ?
Speaker 4In the middle of the show .
Speaker 2No , we did Right .
Speaker 3I'll add it Great length for a show , by the way .
Speaker 1Yeah .
Speaker 4No , we didn't , it was the first show , so do it now do it now .
Speaker 1Um , okay , so sorry , we forgot about our sponsors . Noah , you cannot have something like this without amazing sponsors . We have to fit your , your jewish theme . We have a and h provisions the best glott kosher meat out there , especially the hot dogs . A and h provisions and their website is kosherdogsnet , and if you use promo code MOTI you get 30% off of your first order . And Weitz and Luxembourg , the law firm that not only does well , they do good , they're very philanthropic and do amazing things for the community . And our friend of the podcast , arthur Luxemburg , and , of course , his wife , randy , who listens to the podcast and tells him all about it . Thank you everybody .
Speaker 4Lots of love .