AND HERE’S MODI

The Choosing People

• Modi • Season 9 • Episode 129

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Episode 129: The AHM crew catches up (and takes a new studio for a spin). Be sure to follow the podcast on Instagram at @ahm_podcast. 

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Modi:

Welcome to, and here's Modi off time, but this is airing.

Leo:

You always do that. I never have an answer for you. We have like four episodes in the can, so I can't exactly tell you when this is coming up.

Modi:

When this is airing, leo and I are full, deep and touring. We have been to Zurich, we've been to London, we've been to everywhere and we're been to London, we've been to everywhere, let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Leo:

We're now speaking in future tense.

Modi:

Right, there's no need to Okay, this is like a message in the bottle to the past as we record this.

Leo:

Message in the bottle. Ariel looks like she has something to say. Go ahead.

Periel :

I have a question.

Leo:

Go ahead, go for it.

Periel :

I know that we started to discuss and I didn't get the full take that you guys started to watch the Menendez brothers.

Modi:

Yes.

Periel :

And I have some really strong feelings about it. And Leo, I asked Leo about it and he said that he was really too young, that he didn't really remember like that being like a craze.

Leo:

Well, what year did that happen? Again, it was 93, 94.

Modi:

So I was one year old. I remember all of it, but you don't like it.

Periel :

Did you?

Leo:

What If it was in 93, I was one year old. Let's look it up.

Modi:

It was like the OJ Simpsons Just every night they gave you a little bit more of what's happening, just a little more, a little more, a little more. But I don't remember it, I didn't like clock it Me neither. All of a sudden, you get it. It's like Chernobyl.

Leo:

I wasn't even born.

Periel :

It was like Chernobyl, you know, we saw it every night on news and then, like until they do a documentary about it 20 years later or 30 years later, you don't remember anything about it. So I feel like all of these people who are talking about Israel, who until like a year ago didn't know jack shit about Israel, who have suddenly become like experts. That's how I feel now about the Menendez brothers after watching like a Ryan Murphy television show and a documentary.

Leo:

Well, I think, like Kim Kardashian, who is an advocate for all sorts of wrongfully convicted people, has made a statement since the show came out that she wants them to reopen the case.

Periel :

And I have to say I am in full agreement with Kim Kardashian.

Modi:

Absolutely. I think it would make amazing television again to revisit the Menendez brothers To bring them back.

Leo:

They should retrial them. But if they get out, they have to be featured on a season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Absolutely.

Modi:

And back to that hair club for men. The hair club for men, I the hair club for men. I forgot about all that Wait.

Leo:

They heavily feature a hair system, like one of the brothers has, like a clip on hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Modi:

Yeah Well, you didn't grow up with those hair club commercials. No, when the guy comes on, I'm not only a member, I know that Right.

Periel :

Do it.

Modi:

I'm also the president. I'm also the president, not just a member, I'm also the president. So the Menendez brothers we got to the point where they were just talking about being diddled, yeah, and so the crazy lawyer who was coming in, which is making us think maybe we should revisit. When that crazy lawyer came on yeah, I don't remember the specifics of it, it was just like that was on the news every night.

Periel :

I don't remember the specifics of it either, but I just watched both of these shows and these two brothers were, like, sexually abused and tortured.

Leo:

It's also important to know this is through the lens of Ryan Murphy, so I don't know exactly how trustworthy or how much weight he should be.

Modi:

That's how I know how Versace was murdered. That's how I know all of my like. That's how I know how Versace was murdered. That's how I know a lot of things Ryan Murphy brings us back.

Leo:

He does a great job.

Modi:

Ryan.

Leo:

Murphy, if you're listening, we'd love to have you on the show.

Periel :

Yes, that's how everybody on TikTok learns about the Middle East too. No, but I also. I also watched the documentary.

Leo:

OK, we haven't watched the documentary.

Periel :

Okay, I would like everybody to please write in who listens to our show and tell me if you think.

Leo:

Info at ModiLivecom or you can submit a DM at our new Instagram handle, AHM underscore podcast. You can go follow that. We're going to be posting clips directly to there. Some special content. You can DM us there.

Periel :

Please tell me Another channel for want to soak us all in. I want to know if you think that they should be released or not.

Leo:

So let's ask it. Let's ask and we'll post as a poll. Why don't you?

Periel :

ask do you think that, do you think that the menendez brother? Brother do you think that the Menendez brothers should be let out of jail?

Leo:

Let us know your thoughts. At our last episode, I had some questions written down in my notes app. Go for it. Nothing too groundbreaking since then. One thing I did write down, though, and this is a genuine question is blowing your nose and your hands in the shower a guy thing, or does everyone do?

Periel :

that I mean I don't want to say it's a guy thing, but um, I certainly don't do it is it?

Leo:

you don't blow. Do you blow your nose when you're in the shower? It's not disgusting, do you? Do you blow your nose in the shower? You never blow your nose in the shower. It's not disgusting. Do you blow your nose in the shower?

Periel :

You never blow your nose in the shower, I don't know, I mean, maybe I don't think a thing of it.

Leo:

It's like a nice you're in there. It's like a nice steamy, hot shower and then your nose is kind of like a little bit anyway.

Periel :

Do you blow your nose in the pool? No, ew, no, no, I'm not an animal.

Leo:

This is going down the drain Do you blow your nose in the shower?

Modi:

Yeah, I poop in the morning, so is it a guy?

Leo:

Let's ask that Is blowing your nose in the shower a guy thing If you're a female who blows your nose in? The shower call me, is that gross?

Modi:

Yes, it's not gross, it is gross.

Periel :

It's completely okay. Blowing your nose in your hands is disgusting.

Leo:

I also sometimes pee in the shower. For being honest.

Periel :

That's different, oh.

Leo:

Now we have an agreement. Did you have you peed in the shower before? Yeah, of course, but I don't stick my hands into the stream of urine.

Periel :

I mean, I'm not like peeing in my hands.

Leo:

To me, urine is more gross than snot. That's coming out of, actually, okay, that's coming out of Actually, okay, that's a good question.

Modi:

Hope everybody had a great Yom Kippur and a happy new year and your Sukkot was great and yeah.

Leo:

Not only does Modi blow his nose in the shower, he blows his nose in the steam room at Equinox. He grabs one of those eucalyptus towels and he goes to town on that thing.

Periel :

And it clears out the steam room, makes more room for me. Yes, that's okay, though, because that has like function like you're clearing out the steam room and his sinuses?

Modi:

yeah, I don't do it disgustingly, I do it very, you know.

Periel :

No, I don't hook on that when I used to smoke cigarettes, I would sit down on public benches and that would clear out the public benches.

Modi:

With a cigarette.

Periel :

Yes.

Leo:

I would just sit down.

Modi:

With a cigarette.

Periel :

Something happened today on the way to the podcast studio.

Leo:

What.

Periel :

That we passed by. We were walking in the Lower East Side and we passed by this amazing, like old school a million years ago little store that said vintage Dior on sale and suddenly this woman came running out of the store and pretty much attacked Modi.

Leo:

Yes.

Periel :

And she said you have to. You have to answer your phone, your DMs and I need tickets to your show.

Leo:

For free. She said For free, For free.

Modi:

She's like when's your next show in New York? And we said the Beacon. Well, I'm at the Beacon show for free. She said for free, for free. She's like when's your next show in new york? And we said the beacon. And while I'm at the beacon, I, I, I, I didn't, I don't have tickets for that and and it's, it's in december. I don't know where I'm gonna be and by the time I get there it'll be sold out. So I'm like and what's, what can I do for you?

Leo:

right now.

Modi:

She wanted a private show on the side she was on orchard street, uh, between grand and the Land—no, between Grand and Broom. It's a store that her family has owned since 1924.

Periel :

Amazing.

Modi:

The store is the size of this desk and she is selling vintage Dior—.

Periel :

And just lingerie.

Modi:

And lingerie. She's been there forever.

Periel :

I was so taken aback. I was like hi, miriam, I'm Perrielle, nice to meet you. And she said hi, and she took my hand and she started shaking it and twirling it around.

Leo:

Yeah, like you're playing jump rope.

Periel :

And she said, hi, I'm Miriam.

Leo:

and I said that's usually a better way to start a conversation, yeah she came in hot, she came in very very hot, but do you remember that time on Orchard, we went into a different Shmata store that was also run by a member of the tribe, the chassid guy, when you wanted to buy a corset. Yeah, remember, I got fitted for a corset by a chassid.

Modi:

Stop it For Halloween. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and he did not bat an eye. One.

Leo:

Halloween I wore a corset. I don't know what for what he has had.

Modi:

many gays walk in there.

Leo:

He was like. He eyeballed me, knew my size right away, put it on me and zipped me up into it.

Modi:

It's on Orchard between Rivington and Stanton. It's a store that's been there for probably way over 80 years. And they sell corsets and his big thing is that he sold Lady Gaga her corsets. And he's a chassid. He's sitting there with a white shirt, the vest. He's a ger chassid.

Leo:

We should go to him. We'll go to him.

Modi:

He's a ger chassid A who? A ger chassid, that's a Polish chassid. So so he has those, the knickers with the black socks. Okay, and so he's got the payas. And we walked in there and I right away speak to him in Yiddish and I said he wants a corset and he looks at Leo and goes turn around and he goes number seven, number seven he gives.

Leo:

Leo a black corset.

Periel :

I'm a plus size woman.

Modi:

And he gave Leo a corset. And then Leo walks, he gives Leo a black corset yeah, I'm a plus size woman. And he gave Leo a corset. And then Leo walks and then he says to him in Yiddish come here, come here, come here, come here. He walks, perfect for you. Then we paid for it and I was like you know, I was going to negotiate with him. He said $79. And I said to him in Yiddish what if I do it in cash? He goes then it's $79. Oh my, yeah, and so and he sits there all day and he does corsets.

Periel :

I love that he didn't bat an eye.

Modi:

He did not bat an eye, he did not care he's had many gays walk in there ask him for corsets that actually it's for. Halloween, by by the way, this isn't just for him sitting around the house with a corset, or is it? Yeah, well, you threw it away after that night.

Leo:

I barely made through. I got into the door of like this I don't even know how to describe that Halloween party and it was like you have to come in a look or else we're not letting you in, so I came in. A look, honey, I was in a corset.

Periel :

No, no, no, it was like guy drag.

Leo:

I was like muscles out, arms out, but like in a corset.

Modi:

Cute. And then he but it was so uncomfortable, and then I got in and took it off To throw it right out. It was so uncomfortable.

Periel :

But you're telling me, like I don't know, that You've worn corsets. I mean, they're in like some dresses. Yeah, sure, do you wear Spanx Sometimes?

Leo:

Depends what I'm. Yeah, I get a lot of ads now for men's shapewear.

Periel :

I don't think you need men's shapewear.

Leo:

I think it's because I bought there's. It's called Leo, by the way.

Periel :

Oh, my God.

Leo:

I bought their underwear because the band of the underwear says Leo. That's cute, so I like when it peeks out of my pants and it says my name.

Periel :

I love that. Because then you're like do all his pants do all his underwear say Leo, it's very Dave Chappelle of you.

Leo:

So I bought one thing and apparently that's like their side project is the underwear. Their main thing is like legit girdles for like men and I was like do people wear that?

Modi:

I guess so Well, they have ads like we know. When the guy just says blubber, or having it all over the place, it organizes all the blubber it organizes the blubber.

Leo:

Organize your blubber, yeah organize your blubbercom.

Modi:

Speaking of com. Yes.

Modi:

We are sponsored by we are sponsored by A&H Provisions, kosher a lot of kosher meats that are on the next level, so delicious, and you guys have been supporting it. I see that you've been using the Modi M-O-D-I code for your first purchase, getting 30% off, and their website is kosherdogsnet. Best hot dogs in the world and they're friends and family and Seth and it's just, they're great. Contact them, go to the website, get some provisions from them. And Weitz and Luxembourg, the law firm that not only does well, they do good, super philanthropic. Our friend, arthur Luxembourg, friend of the podcast, been on the podcast. And, of course, randy, his wife, who listens to the podcast and tells him what we talk about.

Periel :

And it's Whiteluxcom.

Leo:

Yeah, apparently you've been saying it wrong.

Modi:

No, we haven't. We've been saying it very right, and that's our sponsors, which are great, and what else.

Leo:

I'm curious to see what you have rattling around in your brain, in your brain, because we like it's your podcast, it's my podcast, yeah.

Modi:

I don't know when we get carried away.

Leo:

You seem a little.

Modi:

No, I'm so interested I feel like I'm a guest at my own podcast.

Leo:

We've fully commandeered the ship here. Yeah, no, I love no, it's because we hung out with Periel this afternoon for like three hours.

Modi:

We've really been podcasting all day. We have nothing left to talk about.

Leo:

You're not allowed to talk to us anymore unless there's a mic connected.

Modi:

We bought Lulav and Esro today.

Periel :

Yes.

Modi:

The palm branch and the citron for the holiday of Sukkot, and it was your first time buying one. I was a and they sell it every year. They sell it on Essex and Canal. There's usually three or four guys there. Today there was only one, and it's a tradition that I've just been always buying there.

Periel :

You told me that we were late to the game.

Modi:

Yeah, usually you buy it like the day after. Like Sunday would have been the right day to buy it, like the day after Yom Kippur.

Periel :

It was a shocking experience on numerous levels.

Leo:

Why?

Modi:

Because you paid $100 for two lemons and a piece of buckwheat. It's not a lemon, it's a citron. It's a lemon. It has to have the right thing, the pitom, the little thing on top of it, whatever floats your boat honey.

Periel :

But what is it? What is first of all? Pitom in Hebrew means like suddenly.

Modi:

All of a sudden yeah.

Periel :

Is that what that thing is?

Modi:

That's what it's called. Yes.

Periel :

And why does it have to have it?

Modi:

Okay, that's what makes it kosher, that's what makes it a kosher citron, and you make a blessing with it during the holiday of Sukkot.

Periel :

Okay.

Modi:

It's very, very like it's again spiritual. There's four spices that come together.

Periel :

There's like a million explanations for it. I don't know any of this.

Modi:

The four Yud Kebab, ke. There's the whole. There's the little bands. You can put four bands on it. Everybody has their own tradition, but as long as you're doing it and it's and. I have to shake it.

Leo:

You have to shake it like every day. So the other thing I wrote down was do you guys trust poke bowl places? No, no, let's discuss this because I love sushi. I could eat sushi every day. I love it. I love raw sashimi. Give it to me, yum. Something ungodly about a poke bowl place why is it in a vat?

Periel :

and it's already chopped up. I agree with the first part of what you said. It's the same ingredients, different presentation.

Leo:

I'm totally repulsed by it.

Periel :

It's not the same ingredients.

Leo:

I think the grade of the food. Oh, you think it's not the same grade fish.

Periel :

How could it be Like sushi, good sushi.

Leo:

But that's what they're claiming, that it is in there, like when you go to these, when you see these poke bowl places.

Periel :

I think that shit was frozen.

Leo:

I just feel like several people I know have told me oh, I have food poisoning. I'm like, do you think you know where you got it? And they're like, well, I did eat at a poke bowl place. I'm like pretty sure.

Modi:

That's right.

Leo:

Yeah, I'm like pretty sure that's right. Yeah, people told us that. I forgot. Who told us this? A few people, like more than one. That's why.

Modi:

I wrote it down what would have to happen before I ate a poke?

Leo:

bowl. No, but it's weird because to me those are all things that I love Rice, fish, soy sauce all those flavors it's served like, in a way like something you'd give a refugee Right.

Modi:

It's disgusting. You've taken the romance out of sushi Disgusting.

Leo:

Because you've bastardized sushi and now you've thrown it in this slot bowl in front of me. Yes, Like I'm a cat at a fish market.

Periel :

That's right. That's right Now. Will you eat any sushi? No, or you'll go for like omakase, and you'll let them give you anything you want.

Leo:

Oh, I would go for omakase and I would yeah, I would probably eat.

Periel :

Even that unami stuff.

Leo:

Oh, the sea urchin, oh, I'll eat that. Oh it's good. No, yum, salty and good.

Modi:

The best. By the way, some of the best sushi is from high, high, high end kosher caterers. It was so obvious that he was going to say that Sushi is a part of every Jewish event. Now, everywhere you go, there's a sushi bar and all that. A good kosher caterer gets the best sushi and the Mexican guy that cuts it up and it's dressed like he's Japanese.

Leo:

Nothing says sushi like being cut by a Mexican guy.

Modi:

Yeah, but he's dressed like he's Japanese.

Leo:

Oh, okay, so that makes it okay and so then he's just it's some of the best sushi.

Modi:

What else should we talk about? That's really, really good. I had a what I had, this epiphany that, like you know that the you know. So the Jews are the chosen people and we've always said that we call ourselves the choosing people.

Leo:

But I. That's your joke, it's my joke, but it's what it's just. I don't know if it translated well how you just phrased it. Your joke is that you're the choosing people, Not the chosen people.

Modi:

I think amongst ourselves, the Jews, we are the choosing people. One does this, one does that. He doesn't do this, he does do that. He eats this. He won't eat that On this holiday. He does that, that one. But I think what we were the chosen people for because it says in the Bible that we were the chosen people it was to do comedy, don't you think so?

Periel :

I love that? Yes, I do think so.

Modi:

Because comedy is relief and healing and that's what it says we were there to do. And so which is also medicine, which is also education and culture? That's why you see, on all the buildings that have something to do with medicine, something to do with culture, museums the Guggenheim, for God's sakes, you know and something to do with healing, hospitals and all that and education, there's just Jewish names everywhere, and that's one of the things.

Leo:

That's beautiful. You let me talk about blowing my nose in the shower and sushi bowl places, and you had that in your head. I had that in my head.

Modi:

I was just trying to see when I was going to pop it in. I just figured I didn't want to. It has to be an opening to the whole thing. I just can't just pop in on that.

Leo:

Well, I was sitting here going through my notes app, being like what's rattling around the old noggin over here.

Modi:

What's that little thing you brought to the house, that black deck of cards? Oh, I should have brought it. You should have brought those. Those look good.

Leo:

I bought a deck of cards called how deep will you go. Yeah, wow, um guy asks me that's a call. How deep? It's a card game that just asks you questions. Um, one thing I wrote down in my notes app I says I want to. I guess this is a fitness goal of mine. Yeah, I want to be so jacked that I can cat call, cat call straight men without fear of hate crime. You want to be be so dragged that you can Like when a hot guy walks by. I want to be like damn and then just have them not be able to do anything about it Straight guys are.

Modi:

So I want to be like, I want to catcall straight guys. They're so into like giving each other compliments. Yo, you're looking good big that it's like a game you in the gym bro.

Leo:

Yeah, that it's like it's a game in the gym, bro.

Modi:

Yeah, in the gym, getting big, getting big, and I was stuck in. I was, uh, I was taking a schwitz, taking a steam, the equinox, blowing your nose as one does I don't blow that nose that much in there and um, and I was, it's just, it's like like 20 minutes. I just want quiet. I breathe, I'm so happy and there's these two finance bros walk in and are talking in podcast voice you know, like cadence, the cadence of kids like I don't think we speak in podcast no, but it's like it's on tiktok and stuff.

Leo:

It's like, well, you know, you got to do this.

Modi:

It's like this I don't know how to describe it. It's like and they were like talking about their job.

Modi:

They've been like three or four years in finance and they're talking about they. They one worked at JP Morgan and he worked at JP Morgan and they both left to different places and the fact that they were speaking in full voice in the steam room where the vibrations against the tile were like everybody was in their conversation. I was actually interested because I got to hear like what their worlds are, how this he works from home as long as he gets his goals.

Modi:

He doesn't do this, but KP Morgan was good for that and this is not good for this, and it was like a world that I have nothing to do with anymore and you know just to listen to. But the chutzpah, the audacity for them, did you shush?

Periel :

them.

Modi:

I didn't shush them because I was interested in the conversation and they were in like full, that podcast voice. So what I'm thinking is where I did it. I did it, but it's like so it's not conversational anymore, it's sound. They speak in sound bites, hmm.

Periel :

I'm just in.

Leo:

I'm going to um something I registered yesterday. We were at pastis and I'm standing there at the urinal and a guy pops over to the urinal next to me and all of a sudden, you know, I'm focused, I'm doing my thing and then I see like a soft glow of a screen and this guy is standing there peeing with one hand and scrolling on his phone and the other, and I'm like I will fully admit that I am addicted to my phone. It's not out while I'm peeing. And then also about the steam room. The kids are bringing their iphones into the steam room. I am capable of putting my phone in my locker for 15 minutes and going into the steam room. These kids are taking calls in the steam room. They're on their phone, not doing anything productive, they're just scrolling on instagram, like I saw this one kid.

Modi:

I saw this one kid, he, he, he brought his phone and he put in a towel so he was checking his phone like like with like fervor and then, like he put it, away. And then his watch did something. Oh yeah, his little apple watch.

Modi:

That's why I won't get so he got a little bit busy in that and then he was something was so busy in that that he went back to the phone. I was just watching this. I felt bad for him. I felt it's an addiction. I felt so bad. I once saw a guy use a vape in the steam room and I was looking at him. He goes yeah, I'm really addicted. He looked at me and goes yeah, I'm really addicted.

Periel :

That's insane. Those things are terrible.

Modi:

Here's something else that's kind of horrible.

Periel :

We are taping today in a new studio.

Modi:

We're trying out a new studio and I feel like the people that are trying us out are like I hope they never come back. This is probably the worst podcast I've ever heard. These three came with nothing to talk about.

Leo:

We usually have guests, we have guests that are amazing.

Periel :

Sometimes we don't have guests.

Modi:

We usually have what to talk about. What do you?

Periel :

mean I don't understand why you guys are doing that. I don't think that's true. I think we have a lot to talk about. We took pictures today.

Modi:

Oh my God, that's right. That was so cute. Listen, everybody. We have a dedicated Instagram page for this podcast. That's how great it's been doing. And we did a photo shoot today. We did not hire a $1,700 photographer, we went to a photo booth on Orchard Street.

Leo:

That's called Old.

Modi:

Friend Photo Booth, that Old Friend Photo Booth that has a line that's usually around the block of people going in to take a picture in this photo booth. And I've walked by this line a million times saying this is a line I will never in my life be on.

Periel :

And when did you find out that that was not going to be the case?

Modi:

And then Leo said tomorrow we're going to when Leo does that. Here's the run of show for tomorrow for me.

Leo:

Yeah, usually around 8.30 PM I go okay, so this is what your day looks like tomorrow.

Modi:

And he gives me all the waking up. You have a Zoom call at this 11.30. That 12.30. You're going to be on this call. I'm going to be on this call. I'm going to be on that call. You're free to go to the gym at that time and when he's with me, we're meeting Perriel at the photo booth on Orchard. I said we're doing what? And we went and we got photos done there in this photo booth. They're cute pictures. They're so cute.

Periel :

They look so good. First of all, Leo had taken a picture. I saw it on his Instagram at this photo booth and I was like, oh my God, that is the coolest picture of you. I love it.

Leo:

And then you said that you got some snarky comment from somebody. So there's this photo booth that appeared overnight on Orchard Street. I walk by it every day on my way to the gym and there was always a line, like a really long line. And again, I'm not one for lines, like whenever I walk by those people standing outside Katz's deli, I'm like you idiots, it's not that good. Like I don't wait in a line, but I was walking early in the morning and for some reason it was open and there was no one there at all, so I just walked in. I was unshowered, I was gross.

Leo:

I like walked into this photo booth. It's like let me see what this is about. And it was actually great. And it's like something so fun about you know, having to wait a minute and like having this analog film process and like print out for you. Um, but yeah, I posted those pictures of me on my instagram and you were, and then I archived it. I like took it down because some stranger wrote like did this guy really go into a photo booth by himself? And I was like, oh, is this weird?

Leo:

that I did this, so I took it down while I was pondering it.

Periel :

And then I was like why did you take that down? It was amazing and, by the way, you know who else used to go into photo booths by himself, andy Warhol. So I was like I'm not going to curse, thank you. This moron who decides that everybody needs the blessing of his opinion, of what leo that's just social media nowadays, but you guys should look at it.

Leo:

The, the instagram is at old friend photo booth and it's posting everyone's pictures and they're so beautiful and people are like going there, like in glam and like getting pictures done and it's really cute and we went today and I got there a little bit before you guys, as just as it turned out, and the line wasn't that bad at all you were a little bit nervous that we were gonna hog it because you were being considerate for all the people behind us yeah but I warned them.

Modi:

I was like, listen, guys, there are three of us, so a lot, pretend we're three separate people and they're like that's okay, don't worry, yeah, um, even though I don't know when this airs, but I'll tell you a very nice thing that happened during Yom Kippur.

Modi:

Okay, this is super after. But so Yom Kippur, you know, speaking of lines, my mother and dad, I put them up at the 60 LES, which is next to the synagogue. Oh, that's nice, because it's too far of a walk for them and my parents don't drive. On Yom Kippur, and my mom during the day went for a walk around Soho and she said to me it's just lines for everything. There's just lines Prada store line, apple store line, food pantry. All of a sudden you see people in line waiting for food and then another line for Prada and another line for some bakery. My mom was just in shock at the lines everywhere. So the line thing is a thing, these lines. Katz's Deli has a line that is so crazy. Yeah, I don't get that, me neither, but what was I saying?

Modi:

So in Yom Kippur I go to shul, I go to synagogue and I pray and I have like a little corner I'm in. So I don't like see everybody. I'm up front and I'm just praying and I'm singing a lot. I sing along with the cantor. Everything is very sing-alongy, it's not like solo cantor stuff.

Modi:

And all of a sudden someone taps me and says your husband's working security outside. And I know that the rabbi hired like armed men to be, but I guess one of them came late to his shift there were two shifts and it was just when Leo came to see if maybe I was done and he'd walk me home. But out of nowhere, like I'm in almost like a rave mode where I'm just singing and praying and going back and forth and like in the whole thing, and all of a sudden someone tapped me and was like your husband's outside and I went to see and A I got a breath of fresh air and because the air conditioning was just blowing on me I had like the tiles. Leo, outside in shorts, coming from the gym, goes. I thought you'd be dumb and I'd walk you home, you know you think I would know run of show for the high holidays.

Leo:

It's been nine years now that we've been together and every year I'm confused by the schedule. I don't understand. I feel like it's not the same time every year. The services start and end different times. So I showed up early and I was standing outside. I thought I was going to like intercept you on the way home. Luckily he came. Were you armed?

Modi:

No, but I got these guns on me Guns on you. Yeah, so Leo's standing outside the synagogue, his gym bag hanging on the fence. He's like working security, dressed in all black, you know.

Leo:

Obviously Sunglasses. Yeah, I looked like security. Yeah, I would avoid. And Gov was like, can you actually stand here for a second? And I was like, yeah, but I don't know what any of the members' faces look like.

Periel :

Yeah.

Leo:

Like I don't know, but you can tell.

Modi:

It's a vibe check. Yeah, you just vibe check when someone's walking in. You can tell if they're going to be crazy. But there was a lot of police and a lot of security there, so it was really good, like in the middle of Yom Kippur, just to see in the middle of prayer Leo shows up.

Periel :

And then you went back inside.

Modi:

I went right back inside.

Periel :

How many hours were you in synagogue.

Modi:

I was there from 9 to 3.

Periel :

Wow.

Modi:

Yeah, it was a long service.

Periel :

Is it usually that long?

Leo:

Yeah, it's what it is. The fasting on Yom Kippur, to me, is like pretty extreme, because you're not even allowed to drink water or brush your teeth.

Modi:

And even the Catholics are like. You can drink water and brush your teeth, I know, but it's a whole thing.

Leo:

You got that Yom.

Modi:

Kippur breath.

Periel :

It's Yom Kippur, everybody's breath is like literally, it's hard for me to go into a synagogue during Yom Kippur because it stinks. No it doesn't?

Modi:

It's a very special time. I think it's one of the most amazing days. Yom Kippur, it's the day that Satan has off. Satan has one day off, that's the day he has off. He clocks out, he clocks out. That's the day he has off. So you go to synagogue all day, because you can pray directly to God without having intervention of Satan.

Leo:

And so you don't eat, so that doesn't get in the way, where do you think Satan goes on his day off Saint?

Periel :

Tropez, the Prada store. I didn't know that. I thought Jews didn't believe in Satan.

Modi:

It's the evil inclination, the etzahara, the bad energy of the world.

Periel :

Who's giving him the day off?

Leo:

That's the day he has off. We should look into giving him more PTO. I would give him a lot of days off Is that true.

Modi:

Yes, it's 100%.

Leo:

He can work from home if he wants.

Modi:

That's a day that Satan, the evil inclination, the evil powers of the world have off, and the day that they have full reign is Tisha B'Av, the ninth day of Av, which is like a whole week.

Modi:

No, it's just one day. There's nine days that lead up to it, but that one day is—. But Yom Kippur is Satan's day off. It's like he clocks out that day, and so you want to not be eating and hanging at home. That's the day you want to go and pray and be like yes, forgive us, help us, this and that to God, because you have a direct line to him, without all that interference.

Periel :

That's so interesting. Okay, I fasted between lunch and dinner.

Modi:

I love that everybody was inviting me to a break fast way before the fast was over. Right, right, right. Hey, we're doing a 5 o'clock break fast. Why don't you come by? I'm like, because I'll—. I went to one of those while I waited for you to get done with Shul after lunch. You went to break the fast at 5 o'clock with Michael Hoffman. Yeah, so okay, whatever works for you any excuse for me to eat pastrami.

Leo:

Lox, I'm there.

Periel :

I just would like to say shout out to 6th Street Synagogue, which I had never been to before.

Modi:

Which is amazing.

Periel :

It's so beautiful, it's such a vibe, it's so cool, like it feels like so New York-y.

Modi:

It's because of Gov. It's because of Gov. Gov made that place so special and so amazing. Sixth Street Synagogue, between 2nd and 1st Avenue, and so amazing Sixth Street Senegal, between 2nd and 1st Avenue, and it's you know it's. I kept saying New York is like it's so gross garbage, homeless rats everywhere. But then you pop in somewhere and it's like you're in a different place in the world. It's like Fantasy Island. You have restaurants and all of and you're like, wow, look at this, look at the lighting, look at the seats, look at the whole thing. And Sixth Street Synagogue is like you just walk in there's a big red building You'd never know. You walk in there and it's like whoa, wow, this is like a vibe. And then everybody's so it's so accepting. And so Jared Freed came for Yom Kippur. Eric Newman came for Yom Kippur it was a comedy line. Ilan Altman came for Yom Kippur, olga Maina was there, leah Forrester A lot of comedians were at the synagogue and it was very special, the Yom Kippur service we had.

Periel :

And did they stay also from 9 to 3?

Modi:

No, this was Friday night. This was the services, which is only about an hour and change. That's doable and it's all singing along too, and really cute and fun and it was really, really special. It was very, very, very, very nice. Yeah, that's it. And what did?

Periel :

you eat at break fast other than so let's discuss that too let's it's such a shame it's.

Leo:

I can ask why we're eating bagels at 7 o'clock and I want to tell you something.

Modi:

I want to tell you something that I would love to change it's only because I love my family and my mother loves it and that she gets to see her grandchildren. It's all in my apartment and, after breaking the fast, the best way to do it is just a cup of water, a nice bowl of soup and you're done. Now I enter my house. My mom has a spread of bagels, lox, herring, everything that's like. You know, I'm like I'm not going to have soup, I'm just going to have a little bit, and then before you know it you sit there and you just start shoving food down your throat.

Leo:

On the Dana Bash, did I say her?

Periel :

name right.

Leo:

Episode we spoke about gefilte fish and that I actually do like gefilte fish, but herring is where I draw the line. Oh, herring is so good. That is like I could throw up a little bit just thinking about it, actually, and I had to open the jar for your mom because she's like I can't open this and I had to, like pop it open and it was like herring is so good.

Periel :

It pickled herring. Yeah, oh, it's so good, it's like slimy.

Modi:

What in gefilte fish isn? Give filter fish, it's so good. No, no, my mom's slimy, no it could come with slime, but usually.

Periel :

But my mom makes it without slime, it's oh your mom is making the herring.

Modi:

No, that's not. How do you?

Periel :

make herring it's cut up, but then you pickle it you like, yeah they get it's pickled and sometimes with like a cream sauce yeah, it's very delicious.

Modi:

I feel so bad for this engineer who's never heard. We usually have podcasts on much. I feel like we're auditioning in your studio, but they're also auditioning us. I hope they never call back.

Leo:

Yeah, it's not like I wouldn't say we knocked it out of the park. No, this is usually our podcast.

Modi:

We are not looking to. There's no politics and there's nothing groundbreaking. We're not looking to aggravate anybody. This is for Orthodox women that are walking their dogs. Who are your listeners? Orthodox women that are walking their dogs. This is what they listen to while they're walking their dogs, which is so funny, because Orthodox women usually do not have dogs.

Periel :

They don't.

Modi:

They have children. They have lots of children.

Leo:

Oh, I wrote a new joke for my because you know how I opened the shows in Australia. Orthodox women usually do not have dogs. They don't. They have children. Right, they have lots of children. Oh, I wrote a new joke for my because you know how I opened the shows in Australia. Yeah, did I talk about that on the podcast? Yeah, yeah, yeah, but what's the new joke? So in Australia, modi offstage goes ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats and then he goes. Please help me. Welcome my manager, leo. And then I walk on stage and I go hi, yes, I'm Modi's manager, producer and full-time husband, and for some reason that gets a laugh. And then I was like it's great to be down here in Australia. I've been really looking forward to these shows Because with the time difference down here we don't have so much of an age gap.

Periel :

That's very funny.

Leo:

And then I got a big laugh. And then I got a big laugh and then I made some other like jokes and I said keep your phones away, enjoy the show. It was like three minutes but I want to do a lot. So I want to do something at the beacon in December. But I'm trying to workshop this line because people always you know they're like, wow, what's it like being married to Modi? Like everyone loves him, like my mom loves him, my dad loves him. I go, my parents love him. Like yeah, modi's a hit with everyone's parents, just not mine.

Periel :

Funny, because he's never met my parents but I mean, I think that maybe you want but no one has that context right, I think that you just need like a word or two, like my, you know, extremely catholic parents, or like something that-.

Leo:

How do you say Maybe I need to preface that Very from parents, and Catholic like very religious parents, Radical extremist Catholics? No, not extremists, they are extremists.

Periel :

No, I know they are, but there's like a phrase Devout.

Modi:

Devout, devout.

Leo:

Catholics Thank you. We're coming back. We're coming back, we have to come back. Devout Catholics.

Periel :

Yes, that's it.

Modi:

So how would I word it Exactly what you just said, but just preface it with my devout Catholic parents aren't big fans. Beg to differ no fans. Fans is the joke. The word is fans. So that's where you're going to get the laugh on the fans. So Modi's a big hit with parents, but not my devout Catholic. But not my devout.

Leo:

See, it's a little hard, a little tricky, it's.

Periel :

Modi, everybody loves Modi.

Leo:

If you're coming to the Beacon Show, laugh hard at this part.

Periel :

Everybody's parents love Modi, except for my devout no.

Leo:

My mom loves you, my dad loves you, my parents love you, I go. Yes, modi's a hit with everyone's parents, just not mine. It needs a little bit of something up front.

Periel :

Yeah, just not mine.

Leo:

Yeah, just not, mine is funny.

Periel :

Yeah, just not. Mine is actually good, just not mine period.

Modi:

See, that's it. And then I had another joke.

Periel :

No, but before that, we have to know, you have to say something before that that you either don't talk to them or they're devout Catholic or no, but he's not doing a set. It sounds like he's doing a tight five.

Modi:

He's not doing. It's less than five. You guys don't know.

Leo:

Five minutes is a huge amount of time by then, because I've even gotten my other joke, I'm gonna do okay, let's see what's the other joke. It's in the same vein, like what you know people, what's it like being married to modi? Like my parents love him, whatever, and I go and people have said to me did you marry modi for his money? And I go are you crazy? He married me for technical support. He doesn't know how to use his phone or email or his Google calendar.

Modi:

Alright, that's a recycle joke from my special, I don't know. Yeah, that could work. Luckily you have three nights. We will be at the beacon on the 17th, 18th and 19th, the by now I'm sure they are all sold.

Periel :

But uh, as of now there's a few tickets left for the 17th you also said when I said that that picture of modi at six streets synagogue is so great. There's a photo of you taken by lemore garfinkel. Yeah, very great photo it's an incredible photo of you in three different like outfits in front of the on the bimah, in front of the Arona Kodesh, the ark where the Torah is held. And I was like Leo, this is so amazing, how come you don't have one of these in your house?

Modi:

You know what he said to me. Oh God, it's the last thing, we need.

Leo:

What did I say? What did?

Periel :

he say that's what he said the last thing we need. He said I look at Modi enough.

Modi:

There's many comedians or actors or people who their house is filled with pictures of them, their own memorabilia.

Leo:

Yeah, that's psychotic.

Modi:

With pictures of them with other, like celebrities, and it's like a thing. Don Rickles there's a video of him, like showing somebody every picture of everybody he's ever been with and that's the entire house.

Periel :

Right, right right.

Modi:

When I go home. I don't want to be, I want it to be like our sacred little.

Periel :

But this is like a very artistic like. It looks like it could have been in like a Vogue spread or something it is.

Leo:

It's like a very cool, it's unbelievable. I'm going to have to get it and like, superimpose it. Superimpose it onto this clip, yeah yeah.

Modi:

Yeah.

Periel :

Because I look at Modi enough, I feel you understand Leo.

Modi:

So Leo is my husband, producer, manager, so all day long, even when he's not talking to me, he's looking at me. He's looking at me, he's editing videos, he's putting a picture of me to some show. There's a link with my name on it. So then, like, so that's why I try to avoid him sometimes, because then I'm like I feel like he needs a break from my help. He needs a break from my face.

Leo:

I never need a break from your face.

Modi:

No, but I'm like, oh, my God.

Leo:

Because sometimes I'm just you're talking to me and I'm also listening to you on my computer screen and I'm like, yeah, so it's hard. We don't need a wall with a picture of me too, and so we have art. I do think that's like a certain level of fame, though that's pretty interesting and they do. They touch on that in Hacks.

Periel :

Yeah.

Leo:

Where, like she has the wall of famous people, and I think you have to be like the right level of famous to like have that in your house and get away with it, because there are like wealthier, like well-connected people who, like have probably met all these people, but, like if you were to have a gallery wall in your house of all those moments, it's like a little gauche.

Modi:

I think that's like the video you just saw. But if you're like in one office, it's in one office.

Periel :

Yes, I think those are pictures for your office, not for your house.

Modi:

I have a picture of the Rebbe. That's all I need. That's my inspiration. I don't need to remember that I was with James Gandolfini and all these different people. I have those pictures. I just don't want them on my wall. I just don't.

Leo:

We have the garage in Connecticut has a few pictures that I think we haven't even spoken about Connecticut on the podcast sounds like you just spoke about.

Modi:

We just began how much time do we have left?

Periel :

no well, connecticut what would you like to say about Connecticut, connecticut content.

Modi:

We have a special place in Connecticut where we live on a dirt road. We bought a place and it's in the town. It's a nice, good town, but where we live is like a little bit on a dirt road.

Periel :

Okay.

Modi:

Like a mile in from one place and much more from another place, like a super long next to a river. It's a beautiful dirt road, but you're on a dirt road.

Modi:

Okay so unless you know that. It's like people get scared the first time coming to the house, like where did these two idiots buy a house? So? But living on the dirt road, there's a few fun things that happen. So when you're living on a dirt road and you're driving and you pass somebody else, it's understood that you are both living in this area with a dirt road. So when you drive by you have to acknowledge them. But the way you do it is like you open your palm on the steering wheel and it's like a lazy hile. It's like a lazy little hile. Now some parts of the road are a little more narrow.

Modi:

Okay, so, they might have to zig a little bit so you can get by. Then you got to pick up if they zig. You got to zig hile. You got to hile a little higher. That's a little, that's a medium hile. Yeah, zig, hile higher, zig hile. And then, like, if it's so narrow that they actually have to pull over so you can pass by, you got to get full blown, stretch out your hand and say thank you, give a full blown hile. And that's in Connecticut. But the garage is going to be. Obviously, even though there's a gym in the house, we're making the garage more of a gym, it's just it's bigger.

Periel :

Okay.

Modi:

And we might be hanging some pictures that fans have sent.

Periel :

In the gym.

Modi:

Yeah, in the garage gym area, you're not going to have like an office in there.

Periel :

You don't really get an office. I don't need a really. You saw my corner.

Modi:

Leo gets an office. Leo opens up his laptop it's an office, even though he has a full-blown office there which, by the way, when we got all of our furniture, was one day. So when we have to plan on being up there, of course, our furniture, everything was showing up the day leo was launching some tour the tour. So leo was in his office, upstairs closed, doors closed. I'm downstairs. There's like eight different people one's working on the locks, one's working on the doors, one's working in the garage, and then movers are coming in.

Modi:

I'm trying to get them to help me move one bed from this bedroom to that bedroom so we can get this bed in here, and it's like smearing all of them, you know, to help me do more than I'm supposed to do. Leo comes out of the room at three o'clock, you know, boom, the house is all just in place, right or wrong. It was cute. It was cute. It's like he's literally launching the tour up there with UTA and with all the social media, and he just comes downstairs, boom, the house is in place. Wow, dining room, table, chairs, sofas, beds, everything is all like landed in its place.

Periel :

That's impressive.

Leo:

Yes, yes, it is.

Modi:

Modi. That's impressive. Yes, yes, it is Modi's good at stuff like that. I'm good at that, I'm not. So that's where we have to be. But the Wi-Fi and the TV. Good luck on that that. Leo handled all that, yeah. Internet.

Leo:

The separation of church and state. Exactly, I don't know. Should we go through tour dates? Tour dates yes.

Periel :

Wait, I want to say one other thing.

Modi:

Go ahead First.

Periel :

of all I'm bringing you to my house, because it's still like a pile of wood.

Modi:

I will say it's much easier to do work. Not in the city, if you're, I don't. First I was really feeling bad for you that you have to do all this work. But the fact that it's a house, there's no board and there's no elevator and there's no, it's be much easier than you think. The few things we've done. It's just so easy that it's it's your own house. Every construction I've ever done has been in a co-op or a condo a nightmare, a nightmare, but this is uh in your, your house is.

Modi:

I'm wishing it's gonna be much easier for you, I think we'll see about that. I think you're going to be more difficult on them than they are on you.

Periel :

No, I'm not at all. I'm very not difficult. Just ask my husband. Okay, this is what I want to tell you Go for it I saw a little meme and it made me think of you. It was a picture of the Rebbe.

Modi:

Yeah.

Periel :

And it said somebody asked the Rebbe that, like all of these people who only go to synagogue on Yom Kippur, that they're like dressing up like Jews, they're not, like they don't do anything all year and it's like they're not really Jews they're dressing up to because it's Yom Kippur. And you know what he said to them.

Modi:

What.

Periel :

He said, no, they're dressing up every other day of the year.

Leo:

The day that they go to synagogue is really how they are. I thought, that was really sweet. It's like the Catholics who only come to church Christmas and Easter Right.

Periel :

Yeah, but I think that there's something so nice about the way that you're Jewish, because you're so like inclusive of the way that everybody else is Jewish, and I think that, you know, one of the things that I see with all of the comments is that, like people are like so judgmental and they have no idea what they're talking about and it's just so much garbage and I think that it's such a nice way to be.

Modi:

There's 15 million Jews and 15 million ways to be Jewish.

Leo:

One of the ways is buying tickets to Modi shows 100%. We're going to be in Zurich November 4th.

Modi:

London, november 6th, sold out.

Leo:

Skokie, illinois, november 13th and 14th Still available.

Modi:

St.

Leo:

Paul, minnesota, november 24th, montreal November 30th and December 1st. Then we go to Denver, colorado, december 5th. Then we're in New York City December 17, 18, and 19 at the Beacon Theater. The Beacon Theater, girl, girl, girl. Okay, we'll be debriefing on that. Then we go to Texas in January. We're in Austin January 21st. Houston, january 23rd, phoenix, arizona, february 2nd Tampa, florida, which is still standing February 13th Did you check on the theater?

Leo:

Yeah, the venue's fine, we're going to still be doing a show. Then we go to Fort Lauderdale. By the time this airs, we actually will have added a fourth show in Fort Lauderdale.

Leo:

February 16th and 17th and 18th Yep. Then after Fort Lauderdale I have to click load more. Then we zip back across the pond to London to do a repeat show for everyone who couldn't get tickets for the November show at the Palladium we do February 27th in London again. Then we are in Baltimore, march 2nd, las Vegas, march 8th, los Angeles March 20th I get a lot of requests for LA. Then we're in Connecticut at Hartford, the Bushnell Theater. March 23rd, pittsburgh, march 26th, buffalo, march 27th, toronto, march 30th. And by the 27th Toronto, march 30th, and by the time this airs we will have added the March 31st show. So two shows in Toronto, yes, and that's the tour.

Modi:

And everything's available on modilivecom Fun new space. We just did a little training wheel session here. And we just covered a lot of ground.

Modi:

Yeah, we should not be hanging out with you before we do a podcast. This is we like podcasted ourselves to death before getting here. Everybody you know. I love you for listening and thank you for being such great friends, family, fans and followers. The 4Fs Wow yeah, we love alliteration, we love that stuff. Mod 4Fs Wow yeah, we love alliteration, we love that stuff. Modilivecom for everything you need. You can get your tickets there or hock them a Chinook on that, and we'll see you all soon at the shows. Lots of love and Mashiach energy. Thank you again to our sponsors A&H and Weitz in Luxembourg. Bye.

Periel :

Bye.