AND HERE’S MODI
AND HERE’S MODI is an inside look at the man behind the microphone. Hosted by comedian, Modi (@modi_live), AHM features a raw and unfiltered side of the comedian rarely seen on stage. He always finds the funny as he navigates the worlds of comedy, trending topics, his personal life and spirituality. AHM is co-hosted by Periel Aschenbrand (@perielaschenbrand) and Leo Veiga (@leo_veiga_).
AND HERE’S MODI
Nobody's Thinking About You (As Much As You Think They Are!)
Episode 147: The AHM crew tackles some big questions—like, what message would you put on a billboard for the world to see? Do comedians get stage fright? And, have you ever had to stop a friend from walking down the aisle?
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welcome to. And here's modi. And here is modi. We are back, uh, in the studio here, uh, it's just not just just. It's me, perry l and leo, the three, the. What we found out is to be the favorite of the listeners. They just want. They're not looking for a guest, they're looking for what nourish kite we have to talk about.
Speaker 1:I love that nourish kite a little nonsense that we have and they listen to it while they are washing their dishes, driving, walking the dog, want to just block out the family for a little while. They put this in their ears and we are glad and we appreciate all of you. We have been doing um questions.
Speaker 3:Reflective questions yeah, I bought these little conversation starter cards. Um, you had some too. I pulled some again for this episode, but do you have any that you wanted to start off with?
Speaker 2:what's the best piece of advice you have ever been given?
Speaker 3:no one's ever thinking about you as much as you think they are.
Speaker 2:I love that for better or for worse?
Speaker 3:I love that whenever you think, oh, I have something in my teeth or my zipper's down or whatever, no one cares. No one noticed, and if they did, they didn't care. And if they did care. They're going to forget about it. That's mine.
Speaker 1:I don't know. I've gotten so many, depends what comes to mind immediately Pay your taxes, pay your taxes, oh my God, pay your taxes, best piece of advice and we pay a lot of taxes.
Speaker 3:We pay a lot. Let me tell you something.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for what we're paying in taxes. The IRS should be sending us jokes. Yeah, they should be. They should be writing material for us. But pay your taxes is a good piece of advice. You don't want to be messed up in all that stuff. You see artists and you see documentaries on artists that didn't pay taxes, so that's a great piece of advice.
Speaker 2:That is a good piece of advice.
Speaker 1:What about you?
Speaker 2:Mine is to be a helper. You are a helper. You are a helper, not a builder a helper. I always rather than yeah, to be a builder, you are a helper. Yeah, not a builder a helper. I always tell that to Ari. Like to.
Speaker 1:To build people. Yeah, yes.
Speaker 2:It's like it's easy. It's as easy to be nice and to help. Like whenever you see an opportunity to help, there's like a kid who feels out of place. It's like it's always on your responsibility.
Speaker 1:Don't look around, always look for opportunities. They come. Yeah, what about you? Yours was what? No?
Speaker 3:one's thinking about you as much as you think they are Really Okay.
Speaker 1:No, they really aren't.
Speaker 3:Look at us. That's it, we're done. That's my social anxiety, thank you for coming.
Speaker 1:I'm going to be modilivecom for all of your tickets.
Speaker 3:Okay, no, I'm kidding. Do you have another one? I have one.
Speaker 2:Go.
Speaker 1:What's the best piece of advice you've given people that I've?
Speaker 3:given people. Yeah D him girl break up with him.
Speaker 2:That's my only where it's appropriate, but my some people just need to hear it, mine is along those lines.
Speaker 3:Yeah, like friend to friend don't, don't marry that guy have you told that to someone before? Have you really told?
Speaker 1:people don't. You said someone.
Speaker 3:Don't marry this person yeah, did they. Did they listen to you? No, did it turn out well? No, wow, is it? How did you know this person From childhood, college? It was.
Speaker 2:She's one of my closest friends since yeah, from college.
Speaker 3:So you told her don't marry him. She didn't listen. How long did it last? A few years, are you still in touch with this person? Or yes, that's impressive, because usually, I think, when someone finds out that they've how often do you, how often do you drop?
Speaker 1:remember when I told you not to marry him and you married him?
Speaker 2:I never say that, never do that, because I mean it was there a specific red flag that made you say that. Yeah, a few.
Speaker 1:Like what.
Speaker 2:Like finding out he had children that he didn't tell her about.
Speaker 1:Oh wow, that's a little different.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, okay, that's reasonable, then that's very reasonable. I thought you were like. The vibes are off.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like he doesn't like sushi, how could you be with someone?
Speaker 3:who doesn't like sushi. It's not like that. It's like he had a whole secret family.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, that was one that was like the tipping point for me.
Speaker 3:That might be, that's more.
Speaker 1:How did you know he had a family?
Speaker 2:Because she found out and she told me that she found out. Oh, so she knew she didn't know they were together for a while and that she found out. Oh, so she knew she didn't know they were together for a while. And then she found out this and I said you know, Are you really sure you're going to marry this guy?
Speaker 1:Who hasn't told you about his family? If you told her about the family. Hey look, I have this thing going on, yeah, so who?
Speaker 2:cares. Fine, If he told her what's the big deal Wow. Yeah it, who cares? Fine, If he told her what's the big deal Right?
Speaker 3:Wow, yeah, it was not a pretty divorce.
Speaker 1:Oy, wow, okay, all right, that's a pretty good answer, but she wasn't happy to hear it.
Speaker 2:By the way, girls nobody wants their best friend to tell them that that's a piece of advice. That is like you get like a one time card to hand that to somebody yeah, and they probably won't listen. So you have to be ready to deal with whatever the ramifications are for giving somebody that piece of advice, potentially losing them in your life. For sure.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But it's better to do that than to witness them blow up their own life. Maybe well, I spoiler, spoiler alert you witness them blow up their whole life anyway, because usually they're not taking that advice from you, right?
Speaker 3:yeah, so it's a tough thing have you ever been in that situation that what I have to tell everybody that they just like hey, listen, I know some information you don't know or like no, no, not, nothing, not, not, that, nothing, that crazy one other time a similar thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was very close, very, very close with someone and I knew her wife had slept with one of my friends.
Speaker 1:And.
Speaker 2:And I told my friend don't tell me, I don't want to know Like I do not want to be involved. But then I had to go tell the other person Because she had just like nursed me through this breakup.
Speaker 3:Because they were cheating. Yeah, oh, it wasn't like prior to the relationship.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, no, no, and it wasn't like she was okay, go ahead, hook up with somebody, yeah no, it was not good.
Speaker 3:Wow.
Speaker 2:I hated to be that person, but this person had just nursed me through somebody cheating on me.
Speaker 3:And they're lesbians. Yeah, that makes it a whole other level. Yeah, another level. Apologies to any lesbians listening, but your dynamics are a little bit more complicated than If I would have said that.
Speaker 1:you just said you shouldn't be saying that, yeah, but you don't understand.
Speaker 3:It's funny because I said it and you didn't. Okay, so If you could be a world-class talent on any instrument, what would it be?
Speaker 1:Wow, what an amazing, A world-class talent on any instrument the best. It's going to be a hard toss-up here, because it's I'm going to say guitar, because you can still be front and center with a guitar. If you're on the piano, you're hiding behind that thing and you're delaying and clapping on it and you've got to drag it to wherever you're going too Well.
Speaker 3:if you're best in class, someone else is dragging it for you.
Speaker 1:No, of course, best in class. You want to say piano, because it's the most instrumental of the instruments. It is. Yeah, there's all the keys. I don't know anything about music. All the keys, the keys. You got the four chords here, the four strings or six strings, whatever that. And with you, with your, you know, with your what is that?
Speaker 2:is that a?
Speaker 1:violin I'm doing. Yeah, I don't want a violin and a violin you gotta shut up you can't talk.
Speaker 2:oh, that's a good point you can't show up.
Speaker 1:Just a song in the piano man Dang dang, dang, dang dang.
Speaker 2:Who's the best piano Like? It's Gaga, elton John, like Liberace they're all amazing. Gaga is a great piano player.
Speaker 1:No one's going to pass Liberace entertainment-wise on piano. He killed it. He was an unbelievable thing. It was just, of course Gaga's musical Elton John thing. Was this of course gaga can gaga's musical? Uh, elton john's a musical person. They can probably play a bunch of instruments they get behind the piano. Okay, now the camera doesn't have a full vision of them and it's like you need a guitar. The guitar is hot when we watch the eagles.
Speaker 1:When we watch the eagles yeah it's like it's down to the town and it's very. The coordination is very hard. You understand that you're playing the notes.
Speaker 3:It's just a sexier posture.
Speaker 2:That's what I think. 100% guitar, because you get to be a rock star if you have a guitar. But what's your answer? Guitar, for sure.
Speaker 3:I still think I'd pick piano because I'm not going automatically to that. I'm performing in front of people and I need to be on stage and everything. I just think having that skill for myself and like being in a empty home alone with a piano and I can like just play piano for myself, that sounds very cathartic it's so funny that you went to like you're in a home alone playing and modi and I immediately placed ourselves.
Speaker 2:I was in front of like tens of thousands of people.
Speaker 1:I was At the Sphere.
Speaker 2:I was not At the Sphere in Vegas.
Speaker 1:One man showed the Sphere in Vegas With a guitar and the band like substantially further behind me, substantially further behind me.
Speaker 3:You need attention, honey. You need the spotlight, I don't.
Speaker 1:Yes, but further behind me. You need attention, honey. You need the spotlight, yes, but for a reason I want to make people feel good, that's really funny.
Speaker 3:I can make them feel better with a guitar. Yeah. Okay, here's kind of a similar question. And, Perry, I'll prefer to cut you off. Cut me off if you are getting better ones over there. No, no, you're good. If you weren't self-conscious or worried about failing, what form of expression would you explore? Huh?
Speaker 2:It never occurred to him. You get it If.
Speaker 3:I were afraid of failing. If you weren't self-conscious or worried about failing, what form of expression would you explore? Form?
Speaker 1:of expression Like an art painting.
Speaker 3:Singing, writing, dancing. He doesn't have it.
Speaker 1:Oh, a little more singing, a little more singing.
Speaker 3:Oh, you sing enough honey.
Speaker 1:Nah, but I don't really sing enough. I should be singing a lot more, but I'm always afraid that I'm going to be off or something's going to be on Like a key will be off, but this is if you weren't self-conscious or worried Singing Okay.
Speaker 3:So what about you?
Speaker 2:Stand-up comedy.
Speaker 3:But you're still self-conscious and worried about that.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, sometimes.
Speaker 3:That's fair, then should you be doing it. No, I feel like that's normal, I feel like most people.
Speaker 1:Thank you. Do you know what Thank you? Can I tell you what I'm going to do?
Speaker 2:We're crushing all of my hopes and dreams.
Speaker 1:I was asked to leave. I was asked to not come back to an acting class.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I like where this is going at all.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I was in an acting class once, right, and when you, when you go in acting class, um, it's like in this black box theater that seats maybe 60 people max and the teacher has the, the class and the people, you, you get your scene and you do it and you, some people bring props and some people bring the table and the chair whatever the scene that they're doing is and and you watch everybody else when you give feedback and then this one girl goes up, then she's setting herself up for the scene and you can tell she's super nervous. There's only 12 people in the class and the teacher and she's setting herself up and she's super nervous and the teacher goes. What are you feeling? She goes. I'm feeling nervous and a little shy and I'm not sure what I'm feeling, and he's like go with it. Whatever they say in the acting classes.
Speaker 1:And they were asking the people what do you think? What are you seeing? They were asking the students to tell her what they were. There was that thing. And I said to her why are you? They were asking the students to tell her what they were. There was a hat, that thing. And then, and and I said I said, I said to her so why are you here, helpful? I said why are you here? You want to be an actor? There's 12 people here. If you want to be an actress there's, you should be. You should be hoping there's 1200 people here no, but that's.
Speaker 2:This is different, though, because I'm never worried that I'm not going to be funny. I know I'm funny, I get nervous, I get like stage fright.
Speaker 1:I still get like nervous. Get it like About what? Let's go. What would you be nervous about? Why would you have stage fright if you know you're going to be funny?
Speaker 2:I don't know, it's a good question. I guess that's something to um.
Speaker 1:The only reason you should ever be afraid to get on stage is if the lighting and the sound is not on, if the audience is not set for comedy.
Speaker 2:That's the only time you should be nervous if you're a comedian to get on stage but I talk to comics who have been doing this for like 30 years, who are considered like some of like the best comics in the or you know, in the world, like in our world, um, and they say that sometimes they get still get stage fright.
Speaker 3:I don't know you never get stage fright like it's not something he's like missing that I know, that's what I'm saying. He doesn't have that shit. Those people who like don't feel pain yeah, and like they break their arms.
Speaker 2:He's like he doesn't have it. It's, but it's a fair. Doesn't have it, but it's insane, it is, it's insane, you're lucky.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the only time I'm nervous if it's not in a theater or in a place where comedy is meant to be done. And then the sound and the lights. That's the only thing you get nervous about. You don't get nervous that you're going to forget a line. Oh, I know I'm going to forget a line. Are you insane?
Speaker 2:I don't know On the ride home with Leo.
Speaker 1:You know I forgot to do the diarrhea suicide joke.
Speaker 2:But that doesn't make you nervous I know.
Speaker 1:No, they don't know I forgot the line. They don't know I forgot the line. I know I forgot the line. I'm upset with myself that I forgot the line, but not nervous. I want to forget the line. The show is off the hook. They have no idea how they. I knew it was an 80 where it could have been 100. They think it was 100. They don't know that I was off by 20. It's a big thing, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I hear what you're saying, though. Thank you, leo, I hear you still get stage fright I think you are an exemption to the rule. I think a lot of performers who are professional performers still get stage fright sometimes.
Speaker 1:Okay, and it's okay for them.
Speaker 3:Okay, get stage fright. What message would you put on a billboard for thousands of people to see every day?
Speaker 1:Create Mashiach energy. Just create Mashiach energy. And if you don't know what that means, discuss it with somebody. Just discuss Mashiach. That should be in your conversation. Hey, what's Mashiach energy? I don't know. It means messianic, so what? We should create a messianic energy. Yeah, like if we were living in a messianic world. What would the energy be like? Ah, it'd be like me inviting you to a comedy show in an hour and a half. We're laughing together. That's a messianic feeling. That is mashiach energy. That is what I would put on the billboard. Create mashiach energy. That was the easiest question we've ever had in our lives.
Speaker 2:Okay, maybe you should take out a billboard.
Speaker 3:What about you?
Speaker 2:I don't know. I have to think about that one. What about you?
Speaker 3:Don't be a dick. I was going to say go fuck yourself. Just be nice. Just be nice, period Just be nice, I like that. If you could gift all humans one thing, what would it be?
Speaker 2:Self-confidence.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, If I could give a gift to the entire world. If I could give a gift to the entire world for them to know that your intentions come true. To make sure you plan your intentions out well.
Speaker 3:I was thinking more like logistics. I was thinking more like I wish everyone had a place to sleep at night. Yeah, I get so sad when I see people sleeping outside because we don't even do that to like murderers and rapists and like people in prison. Like they have a place to sleep, not the ones in el salvador not the ones in el salvador.
Speaker 2:Hard topics shift okay I am in the middle of a gut renovation, as you are well aware, and I have become very close with my plumber, who looks like he was cast in the role of Plummer from a sitcom in the 90s. Hey, sweetheart, is he Israeli? This really no, he's italian this guy's been working for me for 39 years. He said, uh, next year I want to get a gold watch for him. I said, I don't know, I think about it okay um, now it's a nightmare.
Speaker 2:this thing like the house, like the floor of the house, is in my yard. Okay, because we've dug up the entire floor to lay down new plumbing, because I'm moving everything and I have not been able to get in touch with my plumber for like three days. And it turns out I'm like is something wrong? And something wrong.
Speaker 3:and he said actually, yes, he's in the hospital so I just want to send my prayers and um love to let's see have someone who can like take over the reins while he's not well, I felt like it might not be that appropriate for me to ask that.
Speaker 2:I think it is appropriate. I think it is absolutely I think you should.
Speaker 3:Who do you? How do we? Uh, I, I hope you know you're not, it's not too serious, but uh, you know my, yet my yacht. What'd you say?
Speaker 2:your floor is in your yard my well, I mean, it's like you have a hole in the in you can't A hole. What are?
Speaker 3:you supposed to do.
Speaker 2:I have many holes. I have three bathrooms that have been dug up.
Speaker 1:This is a family-friendly podcast. Why is this not family-friendly? We don't want to hear about Periel's holes.
Speaker 3:Okay, you did that, not us.
Speaker 2:If anybody has any plumbers that they could send to me, please DM us.
Speaker 1:Do you know how hard it is To get a referral from somebody For a plumber?
Speaker 2:This is my fifth plumber and he was amazing To recommend somebody.
Speaker 1:Do you understand how crazy that is? Because now, if something goes wrong and you then tell the person who recommended, the plumber you recommended to me destroyed my house and has cost me thousands and thousands of dollars.
Speaker 2:What am I going to do, you guys? Like I can't, I need this to be done, Like this has been going on for a year.
Speaker 3:I think you need to speak to him and you need to I can't speak to him, I can't get a hold of him. He, I think you need to speak to him and you need to. I can't speak to him. I can't get a hold of him. He's in the hospital, there's no, you need to go to the hospital With flowers and a wrench and say get back to work.
Speaker 1:No, you have to figure out from him. How is he going to plan on?
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's completely reasonable, does he have?
Speaker 1:somebody else, or can you? Can you get out of this?
Speaker 3:Hello, it's your home. It's awful that he's sick or not well or whatever happened.
Speaker 2:We told you this, what am?
Speaker 1:I supposed to do though. We told you this we were both looking for a house at the same time. Leo and I bought one that we just had to bring our toothbrush and move in. You said, oh no, I'm going to move the entire house to the left side of the property. I'm going to move this to the we told you.
Speaker 3:Don't say I told you so that's boring.
Speaker 1:I told you so is boring.
Speaker 2:But, like I said, to tell people I don't know, I told you, so is boring, but I told you so I told you so, but okay Anyway.
Speaker 3:I'm sorry that that's happening to you. Awful. We are currently getting estimates to. We love an estimate. Do to do some work on our home in Connecticut.
Speaker 2:How many estimates do you get before you?
Speaker 3:Not a lot, not a lot. We are not shopping around. We found someone we like. He's a very white-club guy. We're paying more money than we need to for it, but we know we're paying a premium because he's the best.
Speaker 2:But one, you get one estimate no we've had Well from him.
Speaker 3:Now we're on our second estimate because we changed our mind. But I'm not no, I'm not getting estimates from other contractors, because he's already done one or two things for us and he's amazing and this is like what he does.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 3:And he like checks on the house. He's like managing the house for us, like he's also a contractor, but since we travel so much, we need eyes on the house. So he knows the house very well. What.
Speaker 2:Have you ever spoken to this person?
Speaker 1:All the time.
Speaker 3:I'm the main contact.
Speaker 1:But when it came to the construction part, I was the man that got involved here.
Speaker 2:That's the part that I'm trying to suss out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, is Guy not involved at all in this. Your husband not involved at all in this.
Speaker 2:Your husband not involved at all in this no, okay, I mean he's involved in writing checks right, and a lot of them, yeah, yeah but like if you're looking at the person who's like in in the trenches here okay um, um, oh.
Speaker 3:So if you guys are listening to this, let me just make sure it's in the oh, it's not there. I'm gonna have to put it in the description of this episode. But there's this new thing called speak pipe and it's an app on your phone where you hit record and you can leave us a voicemail so you can like call into the show and you can ask us questions. You could make give feedback. You can like call into the show and you can ask us questions. You could make give feedback, you can ask for advice and we can play. Just know that if you submit a message there, you're giving us permission to potentially embed it in the episode and use it as part of the show.
Speaker 1:So I'll link that in our instagram and in our and on that note too, we also have a PO box where you can send letters that you want me to bring to the Rebbe's grave, if you want. So I have a package now of a few letters that I'm bringing to with the next time I go to the Rebbe's grave. I will be bringing those, those letters, and putting them into the, into this beautiful big bin that's in front, and that's not a bin, it's a built outout cement wall that's around the grave and people put all of their notes in there and I will be delivering anybody who sends me their letter.
Speaker 1:And you can write if you want me to read it out loud there, or if you want me to just put the letter down.
Speaker 2:First of all, that's very sweet. Yeah, is somebody reading these letters on the other side, or is it like going to like the wailing wall where you?
Speaker 1:just someone's reading this. On the other side of olam haba, of the world to come, this letter is going into a connection of a higher, higher power but there's not a person who's like going through these letters no, no, I think every once in a while they go through and they burn all of them.
Speaker 1:Which brings us to another topic. I want to talk about that. The CIA, now we've all realized, has access to our WhatsApp and our chats and our all of that. Yeah, mark Zuckerberg said that CIA has access to our WhatsApp chats and I want to say gesundheit, have it, take my WhatsApp chats. And I want to say gesundheit, have it, take my WhatsApp chat. Let me tell you what my WhatsApp chats are. Let me just I'm just serious, I want to just tell you right now, go ahead, read, so you have this, me and Leo, and anybody that's ever seen me and Leo's chats would ask Leo, is everything okay with you and Modi?
Speaker 3:Because it's like one word answers.
Speaker 1:I'm heading home. Okay, see you there Dinner. I'll make something. It's like there's no, like hey, with little balloons. I don't have emojis on my phone. I have no emojis. It's yes, no, on the way coming going. Then I have with Dina anybody from the CIA? Here you go, I'm not eating I am eating.
Speaker 3:I was gonna eat yesterday. This is your I message, or your what's up this?
Speaker 1:is on I message and what's up? Actually the I message we know the cia has access to. Now it's whatsapp too, but this is the conversation. I feel so bad for anybody that is watching out. My, my, it's so boring, it's so like it's horrible.
Speaker 3:I don't think you have an FBI agent assigned to you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't think you are quite what they're looking for, no, but like go ahead here.
Speaker 1:I'm not eating today. I ate yesterday. I'm going to eat Thursday. That's the conversation that they can listen to, but go ahead, look at the people's WhatsApps and find the terrorists.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:That was too much.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 3:Do you have one Perrielle?
Speaker 2:What do you normally take for granted?
Speaker 1:Oh, everybody takes one thing for granted always their health, their health, always. You take that for granted until you don't have it, until you don't have it.
Speaker 3:I will tell you what I don't take for granted what. Anytime I turn on a faucet or a shower and clean water comes out. We've spoken about that. I am appreciative of that every day. We've spoken about that. You know, people are like I was born in the wrong decade. I was not born in the wrong decade. I was born in the decade of iced coffee, hot water in my shower At this age and body wash of all shapes and sizes and toiletries. People stunk 100 years ago. They didn't shower.
Speaker 2:I have news for you honey People stink right now too. What I said, I have news for you honey People stink right now too.
Speaker 1:They do. Some of them really do have a BO, not me, though. Yeah.
Speaker 3:What did Parker? Posey say on the I just don't think at this age I'm meant to live an uncomfortable life.
Speaker 2:Yes, you did say that I've always felt like that I have a good one.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Do you want to answer that? Oh, we're health. We said health, you said water. Okay, I feel like you're going to have a good answer for this. What is something you wanted for a long time, but once you acquired it, it didn't quite meet your expectation. Oh, um I don't know.
Speaker 3:Those are mez sandals no but that I didn't want those for a long time. He didn't want those, I just picked them up for him, um something I wanted for a long time.
Speaker 1:A nose job, did it meet?
Speaker 3:your expectations. That met my expectations. What are you talking about? I'm beautiful Um.
Speaker 2:Love that.
Speaker 3:Let me think about that some more, because I feel like everything that I've wanted really badly that I have had been lucky enough to receive and get. I'm pretty happy with. Same same, but do you have an answer for that?
Speaker 2:um.
Speaker 3:I'll tell you one thing that a house cause you're missing a plumber. But if you didn't have, if you weren't missing a plumber, that might not be your answer once you're done with that house, you'll forget everything.
Speaker 1:You're done with that house, you'll forget everything you went through. Once it's done you'll forget everything you went through.
Speaker 2:No, I won't, because you're never done. I don't have a house manager, so every time something happens it becomes like your whole life. What did my grandmother say, honey? It's like having a baby. They never stop needing something from you.
Speaker 1:There's a big difference here. There's always, obviously, when you own property and you have to do, you have to maintain, you have to maintain. But once you finish that main construction, you get to a point where that's it, no more, no more workers, no more putting paper down, that's it, I'm done, I am done, I am done. And you take a big fat breath from it and you're finished and you forget. And you're living in the house and you forget all the hell you went through with the contracting to get there. Later on you start to add something or fix something or change a light fixture, but that main thing, when you're done with it, you feel like wow, when we had all the paper left in the house came out, we were like we're done and you forgot the months of hell.
Speaker 3:You went the last few weeks where we were walking around in flip-flops in the house because it was still sawdust and construction Inch of dust.
Speaker 1:We were out in the house and then we whatever, but it's.
Speaker 3:You get that If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality. What would it be? A great night's sleep.
Speaker 1:That's not a quality.
Speaker 2:Oh, such a quality I was going to say a six pack, is that's not a quality? Such a quality, I was going to say a six pack.
Speaker 1:Is that a quality? He already has that?
Speaker 2:Patience, yeah, but I don't.
Speaker 3:I don't have a six pack.
Speaker 2:Patience.
Speaker 3:I was going to say patience Also, just like the ability to chill the fuck out Patience. Like.
Speaker 1:I just want to be To not be anxious.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you want to not be anxious. Yeah, you'd want to not be anxious. I would like to be like, not anxious and be able to just calm down. Okay, that's all. Your answer is sleep. I have another question.
Speaker 2:Can I have more cards?
Speaker 1:I don't know we're committing to these cards, aren't we?
Speaker 3:Unless you want to talk about something that you think is going to engage the listener. More People are going to write in their own answers to this and we're going to get to like interact with that?
Speaker 1:I don't know that email you sent that email. You sent that email. You Did you like that email. Do you want me to read it? I think we should read it. Okay, we have time. Okay, okay, received uh again as we do. You guys know that we we receive emails and dms and all kinds of stuff from listeners and we love it and, uh, this one is kind of heavy.
Speaker 3:Okay, so I'm not going to read the name, but someone emailed this to me. Dear modi, leo and perriel, first I would like to let you know that I really enjoy listening to your podcast, especially the ones where it's just the three of you, and I'm thrilled that I have a ticket for your show in Antwerp, modi. Your singing is so beautiful and a show with you telling stories and singing songs I think would be amazing. Please don't make me sing. That goes back.
Speaker 1:We've talked about this. Please don't make me sing.
Speaker 3:That's a project we're working on Now. That's a project we're working on Now for my question. My father, a Jew, was born in the Netherlands in 1942. While his whole family was deported to the camps, my father, who was just a baby, went into hiding with a loving non-Jewish couple. His family did not return and my father grew up with these non-Jewish people. Despite this, my father also grew up with Jewish traditions, as he spent time, weekends and holidays with a Jewish family. My father chose to give his children me, my brother and my sister a non-Jewish upbringing.
Speaker 3:I, however, grew up imbued with my Jewish family's history and the atrocities of the Holocaust and therefore I feel a strong connection to the Jews. However, my mother is not Jewish and that means I am not Jewish either, although my Jewish name suggests otherwise. Because of October 7th and the negative reaction in the world towards Israel and the Jews, I feel an even stronger kinship with the Jewish people and I have started to delve deeper into Judaism, but I struggle with the fact that I am not jewish. I feel like an outsider standing out. I do not belong to the jews, but I do feel the hurt and frustration. Also, I have a non-jewish partner that has a hard time understanding my feelings. Can you please give me words of wisdom that will help?
Speaker 1:It's a lot no.
Speaker 2:It can be. I mean, I think it depends. The history is a lot. I think that there are. She's not alone, though. I think that there are a lot of people who survived the Holocaust that went really in the other direction, that I've been reading about recently, but I don't think it has to be a lot. I think that she does belong. It's not. There's not one way you say this all the time there's not one way to be Jewish Correct. It doesn't have to be one or the other. I think that she can embrace the parts of her that feels like that and I think that, um, but do you think it means?
Speaker 2:something spiritual, that spiritually that she feels such a gravitational pull towards it yeah, I do, I think that I, I think it does mean something spiritually she doesn't mention potentially converting right.
Speaker 3:Do you have to?
Speaker 2:convert if your mother is not, if your father's Jewish?
Speaker 1:yeah it baffles me how much you don't know. I've never. I always think to myself wow, we've reached a point where we Perry L really doesn't know. But now, if, now that you had asked that, yes, yes, yes, the Jewish religion goes by the mother.
Speaker 2:That I know. I know that it goes by the mother.
Speaker 3:I have feelings about that, which okay, I know, but I didn't know that you have to.
Speaker 2:Actually that feels like a little Like if your father's Jewish, you still have to convert. Like that feels like a little bit much.
Speaker 1:I think you still have to do the traditional process of conversion.
Speaker 2:Yeah speak to an Orthodox rabbi to get the full. Get him on the phone.
Speaker 1:No, no For this person first of all.
Speaker 3:I First of all thank you for buying a ticket to Antwerp Exactly.
Speaker 1:Can't wait to see you there, can't wait to see you in Antwerp. Come and say hi, modi will convert you.
Speaker 1:I'll give you. I'll give you Moshiach energy, yarmulke or hat and you will be right on your way Again. I just think again, everything is just create Moshiach energy. Now, if something that helps you create Moshiach energy is lighting candles Friday night or hanging a mezuzah on your door, do it. If you connect with the energy of lighting a candle Friday night because it's the Sabbath, do it, whether you're Jewish.
Speaker 1:The energy of lighting a candle friday night because it's the sabbath, do it, whether you're jewish or not. If you want to hang a mezuzah on your door, bring this prayer that protects your home and put it on your door, do it, do it. You know it's something that that's. It's a technology that has been brought to the world by the israelites, by the jewish people. It's here it, and she has a connection to it, obviously, because it's in her DNA and it's. You know, it's in there. I've seen people who converted, but you can really see that the soul changed and they had such a calling for it. It wasn't because they were marrying somebody Jewish. So she obviously has a calling. Now, if you and your husband are working this out and he's okay with the journey you're on, you know that you want to light candles.
Speaker 1:You want to go listen to Kol Nidre services on Yom Kippur? Go buy a ticket to the synagogue and go listen to the cantus in Kol Nidre. Do it Again. You're doing it because it's going to make you a better person, right? I don't do anything in the Jewish religion unless I'm doing it because it's going to make me a better person. I put on tefillin every day because it's going to make me a better person that day, or that's at least my intention. It's not. So I can tell everybody. I put on tefillin, you didn't. I'm better than you. I'm a better Jew than you because I like candlest Friday night. No, I like candlest Friday night because it's going to give me an energy of being a better person, creating more mashiach energy, right? So that's one thing I can. I can definitely tell this beautiful person is that whatever is on the menu of judaism that works for you and you like, do it a la carte, baby, do it a la carte.
Speaker 3:See what works, see, see where you can find a place where you can have a shabbat dinner and bring your husband and he'll feel welcome too um, I will say there's something to be said that she has such a direct connection through via her father, to the holocaust, of course, because I believe in like generational, um, trauma, trauma and like memory almost in your dna, like I think that's been like scientifically proven at this point, so I feel like I don't know, there's some. It's not like she's coming out of nowhere, she's just like, oh, I just want to be jewish.
Speaker 1:Now, all of a sudden, like she has a direct, she has a bigger card that she can play in that, in this um at the table. You know, she might not be able to say I'm, I'm jewish according to dna, but I am a survivor. I'm a. I'm a daughter of a survivor. My father was my father, not a survivor, a holocaust victim. He died right, she said.
Speaker 2:How could he die when he was a baby? How would she be born?
Speaker 1:Oh, no, no, no, okay, yeah, he escaped.
Speaker 3:He escaped.
Speaker 1:He's a survivor of the.
Speaker 3:Holocaust no he was hidden.
Speaker 2:He was hidden. His whole family was killed. He's a survivor.
Speaker 1:That's considered a survivor of the Nazis, yes, someone that was in hiding and come out as a survivor of the nazis. I know this personally because I had one speak with the people who give aid. You know, when mr hirsch lived down the hall from us and he was in hiding during the war and we tried to get him aid from the uh, it's called the victims of nazis. It's not just holocaust survivors, it's victims of not and he was a victim of that. He was in hiding because of nazis yeah, so it's my uncle.
Speaker 1:He was the craziest conversation you ever had. I called this thing and the woman that called up was was a woman who I her name was a very okay, keep going was a very not jewish name, and she could tell she's not jewish. And she was asking me all these questions like and where was he? Where was he during during? Was he during the war? I said his parents had a timeshare in Florida. That's where he was. I'm like you know, but we got to the point where she was able to get help. You know, yeah, people, she has that big card to play. There's a big, big card to play and she should be accepted, definitely by herself and by other people. And, again, if at one point she feels she needs to convert, never push somebody to convert. If they're being pushed by their inner soul to convert, go and convert and find your happiness. And God, you listen to us. Thank God, thank God she listens to us.
Speaker 2:This is a very Jewish thing you're doing.
Speaker 1:To listen to us. Yeah, you're getting points. If you go to a conversion rabbi and said what do you want? Why do you want a conversion? I listen to Anhir's Modi.
Speaker 3:He'd be like you're in, you're out of points.
Speaker 1:Done Next.
Speaker 3:I have a question that I struggle with myself personally.
Speaker 2:Wait, what's?
Speaker 3:your advice to her. Well, as someone who it does have a very strong tie to judaism at this point via modi um, but I am not jewish, obviously, and I have no plans on converting um I don't feel like I have the right things to say to her other than finding a place where you feel welcome, starting with a shabbat dinner somewhere, um, but I just know that's not. I don't feel that same calling that she does, so I it's hard for me to speak to that because your, your father, wasn't in hiding during the war.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you don't have the same experience as her. Yeah, you married a jew. It's a different experience.
Speaker 3:Okay, next question is it better to let relationships ebb and flow in and out of our lives or intentionally try to maintain them? Wow, wow, perfect question, because I feel like I'm guilty of both.
Speaker 1:You shouldn't feel guilty again. Who feels guilty? Um? People feel guilty. Modi, as somebody who has years on you, we won't say how many.
Speaker 3:What?
Speaker 1:We won't say how many. Well, I have 22 years on you and I will tell you, I've had friends when I was in my 30s and 20s and relationships change. Sometimes it's somebody that you talk to every single day and then things change. Things change, they move, you move, they come. You're dating somebody, you're busy working. Things change. The relationship needs to be able to change A hundred percent and you shouldn't feel guilty if you don't see them for a big chunk of time.
Speaker 3:I just feel like there are other people who it is a skill they have to know how to check in on people, how to like show up for people even if they're far away, even if there's a long distance thing. There are people like people I went to college with, who are like still very close even though they live in different places now and I see you know they do weekends together. I'm not good at that. I never stayed in touch with people like that.
Speaker 1:It's very hard for me Me neither- I have the people in my life now, people that I met. I have almost no friends from college, almost no friends from high school that I are close, nothing. But I have the people now. So if I do see and I don't on Facebook two friends from high school that are piling around, good for them.
Speaker 2:I don't need to be piling around.
Speaker 1:That's not what I'm asking. By the way, when we are in town, we invite all our friends over to come over for sushi and we sit and we catch up. We have an amazing time Doing that tonight and you go to movies and restaurants, which I hate going to with your friends.
Speaker 3:At least you said on record that you hate going to restaurants, because every time I tell you you hate coming to restaurants you go. I don't like going to restaurants you hate going to restaurants. He doesn't like going to restaurants.
Speaker 2:Do you like going to restaurants?
Speaker 3:I love a good restaurant.
Speaker 2:I love a good restaurant. Obviously there's bad restaurants. Why don't you like going?
Speaker 3:He doesn't like loud, it has to be like the right decibel level.
Speaker 2:You have to be able to have a conversation. The lighting has to be right, yeah, and the food has to be right.
Speaker 3:There are a few restaurants that I know you like very few, yes, but those you like going to, yeah, yeah, okay, but isn't like experimenting, like oh, there's a new restaurant, but you guys also aren't like foodie people, you don't eat so like, but let's get back to the okay.
Speaker 2:So this is what I want to say. Okay, um, because I struggle with this too and I struggle with I've had people who were really like my closest friends in the world, who you know. Then suddenly they're not, for a variety of reasons, and I think that, like with anything, and it can be very painful, but, um, yeah, going through a friend breakup can be just yeah it can be heartbreaking, but I think that, like you can't hold on to things like tightly, you know, I don't not you.
Speaker 2:Just in general, I think that there's a difference between trying to like hold on to something tightly or being willing to put in the effort like you have to show up, like if you want to have a relationship. It takes two people who are willing to go out of their way when it's not convenient and show up. I think you guys remember I just flew to california to see one of my oldest friends because I hadn't seen him in years and um, it's hard, though yeah, you're, you're busy, you're busy everybody, everybody is.
Speaker 2:So I think relationships do ebb and flow and people do come in and out of your life and it is, it's hard and it's sad too, like somebody who you were really, really, really close to um yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So I don't know what the answer right in your thoughts, comments, your thoughts, but. But I but it's your. If it's a real friend, you can with withstand whatever it is you're going through, and if it's a bunch of time you don't have to call and then you catch up.
Speaker 2:And then it's like no time has passed at all. Right, like then. It's amazing, because you see the person and you feel like you saw them yesterday, which is an incredible thing.
Speaker 1:I really love the fact that we have Instagram and so, like whoever we have, that's like a close person. I see what they're doing, they see what I'm doing, so when we get together, we catch right up. When you have a friend who doesn't have social media, then they're like what have you been up to? I'm like are you kidding?
Speaker 2:you're really just go through my instagram.
Speaker 1:I'm just um just go through the instagram but like then, but then I'll just I'll avoid it, I go, I'm just happy, I'm doing great, we're happy, but hashem, thank god, that's it. You can't start that. We were here we.
Speaker 3:We were there we came there Speaking of happy our sponsors Are we happy to have these sponsors.
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Speaker 1:Kosherdogsnet for all of what you need from A&H Provisions Unbelievable food, seth, great partner here at the. And here's Mody podcast 30% off of your first order with promo code. Mody Again. Kosherdogsnet podcast 30% off of your first order with promo code Modi Again kosherdogsnet. Make it a part of your summer, make it a part of your life. If you are a food person and love meat, this is where to get it. Weitz and Luxembourg the law firm that not only does well, they do good, philanthropic help, communities and charities and everything they do. One of the things they do is help us. They are a collaborator of us and we love them. Thank you very much to Arthur, luxemburg and Randy, who listens to the podcast and tells them what we talk about. Thank you, guys very much for being a part of us and visit modilivecom for all of our upcoming tour dates.
Speaker 3:We're going to be in Europe in May and then we have shows domestically in the summer and I'm working on finalizing fall routing, which includes cities like Atlanta and Vancouver and San Francisco and a bunch of other cities you guys have been asking for. So please sign up for the mailing list. Go to Modi's website type in your email so that whenever I send out ticket links, you get them and you don't miss us when we're yeah, we're flying over.
Speaker 1:Look, it's nothing europe. We're going to warsaw, we're going to manchester, munich, frankfurt, geneva and antwerp. If you're not living there, find somebody who you know is and say, hey, you know, modi's coming to where you are. And then also Indianapolis, columbus, hampton Bays, omaha, nebraska yeah, help us find the Jews there. Okay, kansas City, not just the Jews. Let somebody who you think is going to love comedy with a Jewish flavor go see Modi ModiLivecom. Be the friend that brings the friends to the comedy show. Thank you very much for listening. Go see Mody ModyLivecom. Be the friend that brings the friends to the comedy show. Thank you very much for listening. I hope we've helped you. Just have a nice hour or 45 minutes or 15 minutes, whatever we did here, just to stop your thinking about things that aren't fun, that's it. And then maybe provoke you to think of something that wants you to send us a DM or a message or that voice message on what's it called?
Speaker 3:I'll link it. On it's called SpeakPipe I'll link it in the description of the episode. You can send us a voicemail.
Speaker 1:That's it. So get on CrackPipe. Give us a message, speakpipe. Don't get on the CrackPipe. Don't get on the CrackPipe, speakpipe. Let us know you can send us anything you want to the PO Box, which is also there.
Speaker 3:The address is listed in all the descriptions of the episode. That's it.
Speaker 1:Everybody. Thank you very much. Hope you're having a great life.
Speaker 2:Bye.